Filling in the Empty Spaces

I can imagine myself seeing you again. I mean, not the way I wanted to before, when I was broken and angry and bitter. Then I wanted you to suffer. Then I wanted you to hurt. Now I can imagine myself seeing you and not feel like I want to rip your heart out. I will always be sad where you’re concerned. You were… are the love of my life and just because it ended the way it did and just because I wanted it more than you did, doesn’t change the fact that we were beautiful and amazing once. Maybe one of these days I’ll see you walking across the street or waiting in line at the coffee shop and maybe I will still be in love with you and maybe you won’t be, but it will be okay. I’ll be able to smile and say hi and wish you well and I’ll be able to say goodbye without crumbling on my feet right there and then. I guess what I’m saying is, it’s better now. I won’t ever fully be okay but… I’m better now.

I am the original fragrance of the earth. I am the taste in water. I am the heat in fire and the sound in space. I am the light of the sun and moon and the life of all that lives

You have moments where you think you’re over it and then you have others where you cry on the bathroom floor wondering why you weren’t good enough.

For once, I’d like to be in the kind of love that makes you feel complete, the kind that gives color to what used to be gray, the kind that makes it all seem worth it. Because my beaten heart is tired of falling and picking itself up.