well meowdy there

i love "coyote time" as a phrase. I wish it was time for coyotoes all of the time.

Lowkey I’m talking to someone… should I be killed

jojo heritage post

if i made a video game where you get to pick the gender of the player character i'd make both the options be nonbinary and you can either have they/them or it/its pronouns. those are your only options

I love getting unaccompanied minors (kids flying alone) who so clearly just. Don't want to be here lol. Sometimes I get to know a little of their story, like their parents are divorced, or a family member died and they're heading to the funeral, but usually they just don't want to talk about it and that's fine. But I always treat the flight like it's a challenge to make them smile. I offer them snacks and soda but that's never enough, that's whatever, they could get those from an airport vending machine. Chump change. So then I tell the worst jokes. Just the most embarrassing, kindergarten teacher, annoying dad jokes you can think of. And those always get a groan, or a "Seriously??" And that's my in! Now I can say "Why, what's your idea of a good joke? No, come on hotshot, make your best joke, let's see it." And they hem and they haw but of course they eventually tell me their very best joke because kids are little competitive comedy goldmines. And it's always super funny, so I laugh, and that's where they slip up. Because you know what you almost always do when your joke successfully makes someone laugh? You smile. And I'm like. Gotcha. Rookie move. Now you're going to end up having a good time in spite of yourself. I win.

Did this with an 11yo u.m. today and he said "What did the ghost say to the other ghost?" And I said "What?" "Nothing. Ghosts aren't real."

very entranced and enamoured with this deeply mad rant post I read about leon kennedy erectile dysfunction and how physically impossible it would be for leon kennedy to have erectile dysfunction and how according to consulted medical and fitness experts erectile dysfunction is impossible for leon kennedy to have. if I am honest I cannot stop thinking of the improbable case of leon kennedys impossibly limp penis

thinking about the improbable case of leon kennedys impossibly limp penis again

Leon Kennedy is not allowed to have a limp dick unless your parents are at least 49 years old(?)

goodposting example: hey guys, just fucked a bug

no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

pins you to my Dragon sized mattress. give me EGGS.

it was pretty good :)

It’s called Dungeon Meshi because it was originally supposed to be about two brothers named Dunj and Meshi. They had to change it

dramatically doubles over and coughs into my fist really hard.. no dont worry ill be fine i just miss my girlfriend abit..

takes one step before stumbling and falling over.. you can see blood streaking my hand and i look deathly pale.. heh.. looks like i missed her more than i thought.. youll have to go on without me kid..