One-Woman Force of Chaos

There are only 2 types of stitches. All others are variations on these types

You count as you knit. 136. You count your stitches again to be sure. 136. One more time to be extra sure. 142. You count again -

You do the heel turn perfectly. The gusset is a mess though

You are knitting in the round with many small, pointy needles. You stab yourself

You are knitting in the round with the normal amount of needles. You stab yourself

There are only 2 types of stitches

None of the actors shown knitting are knitting correctly

None of the products shown are actually knitted

Actually does modern Hollywood know what knitting is?

You see a cute pattern. It is crochet

You have a great idea and check Ravelry to find a pattern. There is none. You must make the pattern

There are only 2 types of stitches

"Can you make me x?"

"My (relative) used to knit!"

"What are you, an old lady?"

The tiny baby blanket used a mile of yarn

You are knitting. Your active yarn is wet. You have a cat. The cat is cute and innocent of all crimes

There are only 2 types of stitches

You have a yarn bag. You get a second yarn bag. You get a third yarn bag. All of your bags now have yarn in them

You have yarn at your superstore. That yarn feels Bad

You have a room full of yarn. You start a new project. You do not have The Yarn needed

Shirt stays: these go around your thighs to hold your shirt down, so that it stays smooth and tucked in. They're usually elastic, with 1-3 clips, and if you wear skirts frequently this is a GREAT way to make sure your top doesn't ride up. The clips will be visible if you're wearing something tight, so loose pants or skirts are where these do best. There's also an insane version that clips to your socks, but that is for lunatics. If you wanted, you could also use one of these clips to hold up thigh-highs.

These do a great job of smoothing and narrowing the waist area by keeping your shirt from bunching there.

Sleeve garters: usually metal, leather, elastic, or silk. These are usually worn with button-down shirts to adjust where your cuff falls on the wrist or hand. They're properly worn on the upper arm, and you pull the fabric of the sleeve above the garter until you cuff is where you want it. Because this creates a puff of sleeve at the bicep, it also broadens the appearance of the shoulders. It's great if you're working with your hands or if your sleeves are often too long for your preference.

Waistband clip or belt adjustment clip/buttons

Three different ways of tightening the waistband of a pair of pants or a skirt. You're not going to get more than an inch or so tighter without weird bunching, and for most of these you'd want them to be hidden under a shirt or jacket, but they do the job if that's something you're having issues with.

Collar pins: There are so many fun ones out there, both with and without chains. They're not terribly practical, though the slight weight may help keep your collar where you want it. Also consider collar tips, which pin (surprise) to the very tips of your collar points.

Sweater clips/guards: meant to hold your sweater or cardigan mostly closed. Great if your cardigan doesn't button, or if you don't like it to be buttoned all the way.

But menswear doesn’t get to have all the fun! Here are a few traditionally womenswear accessories:

Hem weights keep your skirt from flying up. You can get sew in and temporary ones.

Lingerie pins keep the straps of your dress and your bra together! They can be hidden or very cute. You can go for vintage ones if you’re obsessed like me or just find either fancy safety pins or small bar pins.

Some also come in groups of three with chains that keep the straps from sliding off your shoulder.

(Often these will get mistaken for baby or doll pins because they are very small, 2-3 cm in length.)

Glove clips hold your gloves to your belt or purse whole you aren’t wearing them, but keep them close at hand (ha).

F/F

I took way too many pictures this morning and this is the reason it sometimes takes a long time for me to post. I take lots of similar pictures and have to go through them and compare and decide which to post. This is just a small sample of the ones I took today of the park and catalpa trees and catalpa blossoms and my garden and other sites along the way.

ok but look at the dresses I just bought on Etsy!

Hieronymus Bosch gang represent!

link to the store (there’s lots and lots of other amazing art print clothing pieces and they’re having a sale !!)

Some other faves:

Aren’t they gorgeous???