someone said βthe version of me you created in your mind is not my responsibilityβ and wow
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someone said βthe version of me you created in your mind is not my responsibilityβ and wow

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the biggest lesson im learning is that nothing is as extreme or as permanent as our emotions convince us they are. nothing is certain and things are always fluctuating and there are always exceptions and there are always mistakes. there is always pain and there is always love. everything is a delicate touch away from changing
fuck small talk how old were you when it all went wrong
Seems bad
Barry O'Brian
they're tearing it to pieces on japanese twitter. also, it's racist as fuck.
also it's really stupid. i mean really stupid.
If we all get super lucky someone will sell this to police for enhancing security camera footage and they wonβt know what to do with all the white men it generates
Have some cute foxes

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Donβt assume malice. Assume ignorance. Life is easier, the world is kinder, and you can educate. Actual malice is pretty rare, I find.Β
Always remember Hanlonβs RazorββNever assume malice when incompetence will suffice as an explanation.β
Thatβs said, never forget Fred Clarkβs Law, either:Β βSufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice.β Thereβs a certain point at which ignorance becomes maliceβat which there is simply no way to becomeΒ thatΒ ignorant except deliberately and maliciously.
#Deep Throatβs Law:#βthe truth is these are not very bright guys and things got out of hand.β
I remember first learning that you can cry from any emotion, that emotions are chemical levels in your brain and your body is constantly trying to maintain equilibrium. so if one emotion sky rockets, that chemical becomes flagged and signals the tear duct to open as an exit to release that emotion packaged neatly within a tear. Everything made sense after learning that. That sudden stability of your emotions after crying. How crying is often accompanied by the inability to feel any other emotion in that precise moment. And it is especially beautiful knowing that it is even possible to experience so much beauty or love or happiness that your body literally canβt hold on to all of it. So what Iβve learned is that crying signifies that you are feeling as much as humanely possible and that is living to the fullest extent. So keep feeling and cry often and as much as needed
SHIT WHAT
Also let yourself cry. It really is a biochemical release valve to dump out all the chemicals that make you feel stuff.
I honestly think one reason men in western culture have so many problems is that we donβt let them cry, and literally their brains get stuffed with all this crap that doesnβt have a release valve. Men, please cry. Youβll feel better. Itβs ok. You are not lesser for taking care of your health.
This is why tears from different emotions look different under an electron microscope. Theyβre literally made up of different things.Β
Happy tears are structurally different than sad tears than angry tears than overwhelmed tears etc.
I looked it up, cuz that tidbit was dope to me and..
Never would have known
Ah yes, the emotions: grief, change, onion, humor
those are emotiong? i thought they were hogwarts houses
I was high off my ass last night and had this dream where I was in this dense ass forest and sitting there was a tall woman. She was so tall I couldnβt see her face but she was wearing gold and I was like βuh...hi?β And she said βI made you, do you know that?β And I nodded and she was like βI hear your thoughts. Why do you hate my creation? Why do you try to destroy yourself? I made you perfect as you are. Please donβt break my heartβ. Then she started crying and it flooded and I woke up with fucking heart palpitations like what does it Meanβ’οΈ????
kindness is a discipline, not a trait
Yes.
As with many disciplines, kindness may come more easily to some than to others. But it is nonetheless something you can learn, something you can teach, something you can work at.
SomethingΒ you do,Β rather than something you are.
This is the single most fundamental and basic thing you need to know about kindness. Without it, it's impossible to truly be kind.
every morning i wake up & get my coffee & i recite in my head this excerpt fromΒ βinvitation,β by mary oliver:Β βit is a serious thing just to be alive on this fresh morning in the broken world.β & i just say it over & over again until it sticks to my mind for the rest of the day. it is a serious thing. i am alive. i am so lucky. this fresh morning i get the chance to live again & again & again

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And I still engage in that stuff to not let others have control of me.
you should never date someone for the sake of dating someone. you should be good friends, if not best friends with your partner. if you cant go to your partner for personal advice, if youre afraid to call your partner out on something, if you cant laugh and have fun with your partner, or if your conversations are only ever performative affection, you donβt have a good relationship
βif your conversations are only ever performative affectionβ woah my bones grew more bones and shookΒ
I used to think it was important to have common interests with the person that you are in a relationship with but now I think it is more important to be similar in other aspects. like how kind you are. how you treat the people you care about, how you treat strangers. how you deal with anger. how you deal with pain. and not necessarily dealing with all these things the same way but being perceptive enough to understand what action each situation calls for. itβs important for both people to be on the same page about what that action should be. itβs important to me to have that kind of synchrony.
This is the post exudes emotional maturity.
please donβt forget to drink water and get some sunlight because youβre basically a houseplant with complicated emotions.
my English prof teaching abt cover letters today and me trying not to bring up the luke skywalker cover letter post:
@serialrebloggerβ here you go:

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βIn the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.β
β
Idiots to lovers, 20k words, angst with a happy ending.