Self aware! Dottore x reader
Warnings: mild cursing, philosophical topics, reader is implied to not be religious
The news of an unexpected guest had long reached the ears of the most powerful people in Teyvatâs hierarchy. From the grandmaster of the knights, to the hydro dragon, and even the infamous harbingers of snezhnaya. The second harbinger, or, the doctor was no such exception.
He had first heard of you from his associate Childe, who, after his exploits in liyue had begun telling his fellow harbingers about a mysterious entity that seemed to wade around the traveler. From Childeâs current experiences, they didnât seem to be a threat, even able to be considered benevolent at times. He told his colleagues how he heard the entityâs voice inside his head, speaking in a lax manner as though talking to a friend, âChilde? What an odd name. I know from reading the lore that this is just a code name, even his current name of tartaglia is not truly his. Iâm excited to see the sweet family I keep hearing about, though I do hope he doesnât cause as much trouble as Signoria.â
Despite not telling the voice, nor the traveler they seemed to follow anything about himself other than his name and pleasantries, they already seemed to know intimate details of his life. After his events in Liyue were finished he found them again when his little brother appeared, he recalled how they helped him and the traveler without question, and even helped him to fight in some moments. He said it was an peculiar situation, he could only hear their voice as a whisper before, but after taking control of his body he could hear them as clear as he would if they were standing next to him, âlets go Childe, we gotta keep up this rouse so we donât crush the dreams of your brother. Just keep beating people up and it should be fine, I believe in us.â
In truth, Dottore could recall an experience somewhat similar during his time in Sumeru, though for his own sake he had decided to keep the information to himself, even from his comrade Pantalone. Dottore was very interested himself after all if someone was following the traveler around they must be of some importance. Another descender perhaps?
He could recall from his time in Sumeru that they seemed to be at least somewhat perceptive, âif heâs the one creating these modifications to the Akasha be must have something to do with the samsara. I wonder what it is that got him expelled from the academia. I mean, clearly heâs a villain now based on his mind control of the citizens, which, would on most accounts be considered morally wrong, though some of the points he raised do intrigue me. I wonder what it would be like to have a philosophical debate with him.â
Hearing this made him curious as to not only what you were, but what it was that made you stand on his side. You allied yourself with the traveler, but nonetheless seemed to hold him in high regard, not hating him for his actions, even ones that would be deemed unseemly by most. Despite wanting to reach out, he had little info to go off of after his events in Sumeru ended. With the subsequent deletion of the other segments, he, omega, was the only person left forâŚcertain assignments. Project Stuzah wouldnât get done on its own after all, and he had other projects he would have to get to, so until more information could be gathered his questions about you would have to be put on the back burner.
While not many had believed Childe the first time, his second mentioning of the visitor, occurring after he met them again in Fontaine, had been taken more seriously. He said that just as before they treated him with familiarity, wishing him the best and though not condoning his choice of fighting the hydro dragon, did agree that his sentence was unfair. The most important difference between this time and the first was that he was backed by not just his own experiences, but the words of the knave. According to her throughout the major events that occurred during her time in Fontaine, she too could hear the voice of the mysterious visitor. She said that after a while it became more frequent, with her experiencing the same âcontrolâ that Childe had described, with the voice not just controlling her moves as she fought, but also taking her around the continent, making her stronger as they did so.
Hearing such odd things from one of their members, much less the lowest ranked would be one thing, but the knave was a serious sort. She would not lie for the sake of humor, and testaments from not one but two harbingers incited the need for investigation. With new importance placed on the subject of the potential new descender, Dottore now had the chance to further investigate in the mystery of the voice.
Because arlecchinoâs account now confirmed that the voice not only held control over the main person currently interfering with their plans, but could also interfere with those of their own and seemingly any vision holder of esteem, they would be something to worry about. There was only one gnosis left to collect after all, and with them being so close it would be imperative that the voice wouldnât intervene in the captainâs plans for the pyro gnosis.
Dottore himself would have gladly entered himself as the one to act as your watcher- with ample funding for necessary materials given by his dear friend Feofan of course- but it was decided that as the captain was the best of them, he would be able to handle the situation on his own. So far the voice hadnât intervened in any way the traveler wouldnât have done already, and their variability had already been accounted for.
As little as Dottore cared for the tsaritsaâs orders, he knew that to get on her bad side now, right before he intended to initiate his biggest experiment yet, would be an arrogant mistake even by his standards. The most he could do now was prepare for his new status as a god, and hope that it would draw the traveler and in turn the voice, to him.
Any information Dottore had hoped to gain from capitanoâs experiences was now futile, as it had been learned that the harbinger had âdiedâ as best a pure-blooded khanriahn could. Dottore was no stranger to the wishes of those who were cursed with immortality, while he, or rather prime, worked tirelessly to find an elixir of immortality during his living years, he knew that whatever joys his previous self or Pantalone would get from it would be the opposite of the agony of those cursed with immortality.
By the time he the traveler had begun their journey onto Nod Krai, he had almost completed his task of resurrecting Rerir. While they would be busy fighting the sinner he could work in the shadows and gage the best way to capture Columbina and gain her moon marrow. While he was mainly concerned with his coming ascension to godhood, he couldnât help but be excited to have the opportunity learn more about the travelerâs guest. Hopefully with his new found power he could hear the voice more clearly, perhaps even separating them from the traveler all together and having a one on one conversation.
When the traveler met him at his lab he could hear the voice once again, and found himself oddly amused to hear them compliment him and his new form, âwoah, dude stepped up. Heâs so tall compared to the traveler, I know we have to fight him in his full boss form in the future anyways but I still feel a bit sad to beat him up in his own home.â
Though he did wonder what it was you meant by âboss formâ and his future âbeatingâ any questions he had would have to be left for future conversations. Even if they were enemies now, he still wanted to convince the traveler to join his side, they were a descender after all, and could maybe hold the answer to others as well through their connection with you.
The next time he met the traveler, he was intrigued by what the voice said in response to his questions, as despite the traveler vehemently refusing him no matter what truths he may have spoke, they seemed to care more for his philosophical implications then the travelerâs opinions on his character, âI donât think I would want to live in a âperfect dream realityâ even if I was given the chance. Maybe Iâm limited by my experiences in our own imperfect world, but in my opinion, a world without problems would hold no meaning at all. Life may suck at times, but thatâs what makes the good moments so important, if we were eternally in a state of happiness then âhappinessâ would have no meaning, it would just be the expected norm. We would be forever stuck in a stagnant state of mind without hardships to overcome, and without any sort of change I can say for myself that I would find a world like that quite boring. Granted, Iâm sure a person who lived their whole life in said world would find our existence miserable, and never want to leave their paradise again, however based on my own current views as someone raised in an imperfect world, I donât think I could ever see myself happy in such a paradise. Even ignoring my own personal stance, what is considered good and bad is entirely in the eyes of the beholder, and thus a world of pure happiness would hold a different meaning for each individual. Though Iâm getting ahead of myself, the debate of moral relativity is a discussion for another time, I need to finish this quest and Iâm sure this is of no interest to you dottore.â
This was very much so in my interests, dottore thought, wishing he could continue hearing the voices thoughts on his musings though before he could voice this opinion, or even register what you meant by âquestâ he found himself asking the traveler another question about their desires.
The voice didnât seem to have much to say about his ask of the travelers wants, though he could hear them again at his mention of morality, âgoddammit, just after I mention the relativity of morality he just has to pose a moral question. Listen man, I know you wouldnât care what I have to say, hell you canât even hear me, but I canât let an opportunity for an interesting debate go to waste.â
Whatever could the voice mean by that? Despite not intending to Dottore found himself very interested in their opinion and what did they mean by couldnât hear them? Were they not aware of their connection to the traveler and the subsequent part they played in major events?
Whatever he had wanted to theorize on was then interrupted by the sound of the voice, âwhile I would like to think that I donât act in my own self interests I canât deny that I am a human, one who untimely cannot completely deny their own wants, I will disagree that I would not hurt those I cared about even if it meant I would succeed by doing so. Perhaps it is my own people pleasing tendencies but I wouldnât feel right allowing myself to move forward at the expense of others. I mentioned before that I believed morality to be relative, right? In my own sense of morals I believe that it is wrong to hurt others on purpose, not because I am worried of punishment, or because I follow the doctrine of some god, but because itâs the right thing to do in my own mind. There is no reward for moral purity other than oneâs own comfort, especially as someone who doesnât turn to a specific faith for their morals. That being said, in my personal experience doing things that would be considered âgoodâ seem to make me feel happy myself, and even if you seem to disagree, I do believe people can form genuine friendships without a specific goal in mind. I love my friends not because I think they can give me something, but because I simply enjoy their company. I would do something to make them happy not to expect them to do me a favor in return, but because I know they care about me in the same way. If I were to get you a gift for instance, I wouldnât do it because I wanted you to give me an equally priced gift in exchange, but because I knew it would make you happy. I supposed kindness to expect it in return could be viewed as selfish, but I do things for my loved ones regardless of if they do something for me in the moment, I simply care about them.â
HmmâŚwhat a contradictory answer. He had presumed the voice to be a person of logic based on their previous deductions, though it seemed even they were prone to human sympathies. Still, he did not feel himself lose interest in them, nor did his opinion of them worsen. Even if they held different ideals, they acknowledged throughout their discussion that they could be wrong, implying that they were someone who was open to other opinions, even if they contradicted their experiences. In normal circumstances Dottore would have found himself thinking on how he could use this new insight to manipulate someone, a person who believed in humanityâs goodness would be one easily controlled after all. Despite this the thought hadnât even crossed his mind, he was more curious about what type of world they must live in to have gained such an optimistic view.
Aside from what knowledge he gained of their moral stances, he could also confirm one of his biggest questions, the voice was human. As for what kind of human could seemingly implant themselves into the mind of not just a descender, but the minds and bodies of those they encountered he had no idea. It only sought to further his intrigue on where the voice came from and why they were here. Why they spoke to him so casually, despite them being on what looked to be opposite sides. And why he found himself wanting to hear more of their voice, more of their opinions. To not just hear them but to fully engage with them, to question them and debate to a full extent.
The next time he heard the voice again wasnât the most pleasant of environments for discussion to be sure, as the traveler currently faced him in battle. He could hear the strange human seem sad over the death of Sandrone, though for some reason still didnât seem to hate him as they reassured him it was ânothing personalâ and that they wished there was a way for him and the traveler to fight in a way that didnât require death.
Dottore could see them once again take over the traveler in combat like they had in his lab, and despite the want for peaceful resolution you taking control of the traveler and their allies enabled his defeat. He couldnât find himself angry at you though, as from your own words you did not want to kill him, seeming forced to do so by mechanisms he could not yet understand.
He knew that this would not be the end, however, as the other half of his soulâs interference in Irminsul was sure to draw the travelerâs and thus your own, attention. He hoped his remaining self could find a way to contact you fully, as despite the voiceâs now apparent humanity, they still possessed great abilities, possibly having insight not even possible through looking at the leylines.
Dottore, the one who had merged himself with Irminsul, was quickly able to ascertain what had happened to the other half of his soul in Nod Krai. Upon his defeat all of his memories flooded into the remaining half of Omega. Learning of the new information he had gained, not only of the traveler and his goals on experimenting what it meant to be a god, but of the mysterious voice, he felt proud. He was in the final stretch of his experiment, and perhaps in this state he could finally learn what it is this powerful human was doing.
He could more clearly hear the voice during his discussion with Pantalone, though this was an anomaly since typically they could only be heard when in the presence of the traveler. He heard them once again delve into philosophy as they debated Feofanâs stance on godhood and celestiaâs innocence. He could hear them mention their agreement that people should not follow gods blindly, and that while they may pray to random god on occasion, they would never hold their life in the hands of faith. They told a story of how they had been a raised in faith, yet always found themselves questioning it no matter how hard they tried, seems like if they were in his shoes they would have been deemed a heretic as well. Along with learning they shared an at least somewhat similar stance in regards to one needing to rely on their own actions to gain success and to question and not follow any power blindly, he also learned they shared a similar stance to the tsaritsa.
They mentioned how they loathed the heavenly principles, calling them arrogant colonizers as they mentioned both the fall of the dragons and khanriah. Even if they were supposedly human, for them to know this information they must be in high standing. Perhaps they were another pureblooded khanriahn, Dottore thought he could ask Pierro later.
Once again despite wanting to mention this to feofan he could not say want he wanted and instead found himself trapped in a sort of preprogrammed conversation. Though he attempted to break free from this, the most he could muster was a small break in his speech, prompting the voice to say, âwoah, I know I play on my phone but it shouldnât have that much issue with the audio. Maybe I need to clear out my photosâŚâ
Phone? Audio? Photos? What could they possibly be talking about? Before he could try to once again reach out he could feel the presence of the voice leave and he was left to ponder by himself inside of the Irminsul.
He would notice the voice once again in the presence of the traveler as they and scaramouch attempted to fight him off. He could hear them cursing out the annoyance of getting past his traps, which he found amusing, but did wonder how he could not find them despite them mentioning failing and setting off his alarms multiple times.
The voice and the companions they controlled were eventually able to cut through his defenses and enter a full on battle. He could hear the voice talking about how they felt as though there was no chance they could beat him with a âtwo person teamâ which gave the implication that they would normally control more than two people at a time.
Scaramouch and the traveler were able to gain a new power thanks to assistance from the dendro archon, and with a final âsorryâ from the voice were able to best him.
In these final moments realizing he couldnât win, Dottore felt the need to reach out to the traveler, perhaps if he got them, he could gain control of the voice and learn about what they meant. Learn about what they were, what he was.
He had a semblance of an idea what the voice could have meant, but he didnât want to acknowledge it. The fighting, the dialogues he just couldnât seem to get out of, the way you knew things you otherwise shouldnât have and mentioned technologies that didnât exist.
The voice, or rather you were on a different plan of existence. Was his existence, his pain, even real? Or was it simply a script meant to entertain people he could not reach- shouldnât be able to reach. Hell he shouldnât have been able to hear you at all, let alone have a want to speak with you, he shouldnât want at all, should only act in accordance with the programming he was created with.
It made him angry, he loathed you. The gods of this world were nothing compared to the cruelty of whatever created him. Someone like you decided to create scripts and worlds for entertainment, and even if he was never meant to learn of this he did. The restrictions placed on him by the gods of this world could hold nothing to the new found knowledge set before him.
He began to laugh, was there even a point to this? Under normal circumstances upon learning of a constraint placed upon him, especially one that made him wonder the meanings of this world would cause him to plan up another experiment. Another thing to learn, another variable to investigate, but here he could only think about how it would all be for naught, after all he had tried to reach out to you before, to no avail.
And as much as it pained his pride to reach out to someone in these dying moments as he did, as prime did, he couldnât help but hold on to a stupid last ditch effort to live. He had long excepted that he no longer feared death, if he was to die to reach his goals then so be it. But still, as mad as it made him, as illogical as it was, he reached out to you. He knew this would likely do nothing, and he would die, with the knowledge of the worlds true nature dying with him. But despite the extremity of his ego his curiosity and want for knowledge outweighed it, and as he could feel himself leaving this digital world he made one final attempt to reach you.
If anyone could help him, it would be the voice from the other side, the player who watched this worldâs scripted events unfold from a screen, you.
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Name, while your existence gives me reason to loathe my own, I cannot help but toss reason aside in the hopes that you can hear this. If you are the player, pleaseâŚsave me.â
Was thatâŚsupposed to happen? You could swear that wasnât apart of the ending dialogue? How the hell could he know your name anyway, let alone voice it? Itâd be impossible for the voice actor to say every single username in the serverâŚso whyâŚ
This was seriously starting to sound like one of those âself awareâ fanfictions you were always reading. This couldnât be serious, it must have just been you mishearing things. Should you go to the doctor?
Deciding to push these thoughts aside in favor of the growing growl of your stomach- deciding to do a quest in one sitting so you donât miss the rewards before an update is not for the weak- you could only hope that your hearing was what was wrong instead of your game.
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Hmm⌠Pantalone could have sworn he heard something during his meeting with the travelerâŚ
