smokyphantom

Sometimes people will say things to me and I just want to tell them that the thing they just shared is like catnip for manipulative bastards with bad intentions.

"For women, only one standard of female beauty is sanctioned: the girl. The great advantage men have is that our culture allows two standards of male beauty: the boy and the man. The beauty of a boy resembles the beauty of a girl. In both sexes it is a fragile kind of beauty and flourishes naturally only in the early part of the life-cycle. Happily, men are able to accept themselves under another standard of good looks — heavier, rougher, more thickly built. A man does not grieve when he loses the smooth, unlined, hairless skin of a boy. For he has only exchanged one form of attractiveness for another: the darker skin of a man’s face, roughened by daily shaving, showing the marks of emotion and the normal lines of age. There is no equivalent of this second standard for women. The single standard of beauty for women dictates that they must go on having clear skin. Every wrinkle, every line, every gray hair, is a defeat. No wonder that no boy minds becoming a man, while even the passage from girlhood to early womanhood is experienced by many women as their downfall, for all women are trained to want to continue looking like girls." — Excerpt from Susan Sontag's 1978 essay The Double Standard of Aging

If you're a lesbian you will soon discover that a lot of women (A LOT) have a really unhealthy relationship with sex or sexuality

As women we are often encouraged to not contemplate our own sexual desires. What we like and what we don't like is not considered important. Discovering your own sexual preferences or chasing pleasure are actively frowned upon. Because of this, discussing sex beyond the surface level is like impossible for many of them because they never put a lot of thought into it.

And they will think they have rid themselves of this unhealthy relationship with sex by dating women. But that's not the case at all. It usually gets worse too because on top of their already strained relationship with sex they suddenly have to figure out how to have sex when there's no man. If you were raised with the belief that having sex is about pleasing and serving a man you have to reinvent your whole relationship with sex.

I love revoking people’s access to me like actually no you don’t deserve to know me anymore :-)