Don't touch me I'm sterile

animal crossing:

* * .🍐 * . 🐟 * . *

🐻. * 🌼. * . .🦋

* 🍎* . 🐶🐱🐮🐭 *. *. . *. .

* . * ☀️ * 💗 🍑. *. 🐞 🍀* 🎶.

. 🌈* 🦝 . * . 🔮

me, who spent the last 300+ chapters reading about Sasuke getting his ass beat concave:

That kid from the first arc with the mask

That dude from the first arc with the huge sword

His brother

Kakashi, I think

Orochimaru

I’m pretty sure Rock Lee beat his ass physically, emotionally, or spiritually at least three times

Naruto

That big tiddy lady from the chunin arc

A math problem

Killer Bee

His brother, again

Gaara

I don’t remember if Neji ever physically fought him but I’m pretty sure Neji used his petty gay shade powers to own Sasuke at least once

Jiraiya I think

Tsunade, definitely

Literally all of the Akatsuki