Here Comes The Squirtle Squad

i think every gay person should get a monthly stipend for. piercings and such also beverages. and i think every trans person should get to hit people with sticks legally

the best way i can think to describe the experience of reading moby dick is you’re in line at the dmv and this guy behind you very loudly says “well who HASN’T had a gay experience” and then proceeds to tell you every detail about his life in between anecdotes about how great sperm is and how ropes work and sometimes he’ll say the most poetic shit you’ve ever heard in your life and them jump RIGHT back into explaining how a whale is a fish because 1) it swims in water and you’re still only like halfway through the dmv line

The euphoria of receiving a legit new follower during the Great Tumblr Pornbot Siege of 2022/2023

thrift stores have some of the most Gender clothes but also, Worst Textures. yet another one of life's trials

one time a women in a thrift store told me god was watching me make this purchase and he was pleased ,i was buying three clowns and a shot glass

one of life's blessings

If I were a doctor and someone came to me to have a Pickle Rick tattoo removed I wouldn’t charge them. It would be inhumane for me to make them go on like that

im sorry the doctor made you pay for the removal but you dont need to subtweet him

All my followers do is own me on every post I make