very. tired.

the thing about body horror is that there's nothing you can come up with that can compete with what the human body will do to itself under a sufficient amount of stress

EXCEPT ‼️ radiation poisoning. that shit is fuuuuuucked.

i know if your parents are from different countries you can inherit either nationality or both but wouldn't it be more fun if they drew a line between the spot one parent was born and the spot the other parent was born and you got the nationality of wherever the midpoint of that line is? just a thought to spice things up. like if you have one algerian parent and one egyptian parent then you get libyan nationality. it's awesome too because many people would get ocean nationality.

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

Reblog to materialize $250,000 in prev's bank account

HESOYAM

need a hat that says I WONT SPEAK UNLESS SPOKEN TO AND ITS NOT BECAUSE IM DISINTERESTED AND DONT LIKE YOU I JUST DONT UNDERSTAND SOCIAL INTERACTION AS WELL AS MOST PEOPLE AND ASSUME BY DEFAULT MY PRESENCE IS UNWELCOME AS A PRECAUTIONARY MEASURE SO I KEEP TO MYSELF BUT I DONT MIND IF YOU INITIATE so i can wear it to work

i think ppl would be a lot happier and better-adjusted on here if they realized that being online on a website is like being in any other casual public space full of people. if u walk into walmart u dont immediately think to yourself “i have to be friends with everyone in this walmart and if not everyone likes me i’m a failure” and u really shouldn’t feel that way online either. likewise if there’s a guy in the walmart parking lot shouting obscenities u probably wouldn’t answer him and that’s literally an exact equivalent to some of the weird stuff that people on here seem to feel they’re obligated to respond to.

every spelunker should go in with a cyanide tooth capsule so if they get stuck they can take the gentle way out instead of being tortured by the earth for 72 hours and then dying anyway

sometimes you just have to peel the entire skin off your lips because self-care

ACCIDENTALLY LEFT MY MACERATED APPLE SYRUP ON THE STOVE AND IT CARAMELIZED I GUESS?

it was super thick and dark and golden and bubbly so i took it off the heat. happy accident.