T U R R Ó N

RIP Lucretius you would have loved aromanticism and wave-particle duality

aaaaaAaaaAAAAaaaaaaAaAAAaaaaAAaaaaAAAAAAaAAAAaaaAAAAAAAAAAAaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

people who don't know anything about academics: man y'all are stuffy and boring what's up with that? actual academics: *too busy fist-fighting each other over the beryllium problem or the existence of a dentistry profession in ancient egypt to reply*

People who don't know anything about academics: they're keeping this grand conspiracy about these civilizations a secret!!! actual academics: can barely coordinate a time for a Zoom meeting, will infodump about their specialty for hours without prompting

People who don’t know anything about academics: How dare these stuffy scientists ignore this poor random dude who has a Theory That Changes Everything (and conveniently makes him a small fortune by selling books and DVDs about the Theory) Actual academics: Has already patiently explained to 40 different people why the Theory That Changes Everything doesn’t make any sense and is also kinda racist, but nobody is hyping their answer because it doesn’t make anybody money or make them feel extra special.

Also actual academics in this case: *vibrating with the only barely controlled need to throat punch Erich von Däniken the dude hawking the Theory of Racist Lies*

I'm just remembering the time I was an undergrad and ran into the assistant professor carrying the replica swords out of the professor's office. I asked why, and I was told it was a "precaution" after the last time the professor's rival visited. I did not get any elaboration, despite asking.

I’m not even an academic but this is weirdly relatable

sex is so boring and passe but things that are metaphorically sex but weirder will never go out of style