Part time artist.

Puerto Rico 

Saving What We Love

me now about everything

Workout  ✔

eating healthy  ✔

       Deftly fingers ran through her hair and softly but firmly tugged at her hair as he worked her hair.  Ben Solo was braiding her hair and Rey had to admit, it felt super nice. She never had this kind of intimacy with anyone before, and she was finding it hard to stay awake. Against her better judgment, she felt she was relaxing against whatever magic he was working on her, and a soft sigh escaped her. 

        “Mum….” Ben began, his voice coming from somewhere behind her, unsure. Rey never asked Ben for details about his childhood, didn’t want to remind him of his loss and his role on it for fear he would break- “Leiah let me braid her hair when I was little. She taught me how. Said I was better than Dad. Han.” He seemed so unsure of how to properly address them. As if he had no right to address them as his parents; as if instead he needed to use their names to show respect. 

           She said nothing. Partly because it felt really good when he messed with her hair like this, and also because she wasn’t sure what she could say in reply. He shared an intimate moment with her and memories of his childhood. She wanted to give him a part of her too, reciprocate the same he was giving her.  

         “…I-” She started, unsure, “Never had anyone touch my hair.” She finished lamely. She wasn’t as wordy as he was, nor held the same level of communication he had. He had more words for feelings than her basic ones and was a lot better than her at expressing sentiment, something that she found unfair considering he had been wearing an emotionless mask for a long time.

          She was rougher than he was. She felt this more pronounced when they slept next to each other. On those moments, she felt she was all angles and bones, while he was soft and curved. She knew they had led different lives, and he was fed at any time he wanted to eat, while she had to scrap away destroyers all day to eat basic protein and carbs once a day. This never went away, not completely. Even after staying with the resistance, she didn’t eat as much portions as the other, even knowing that they could afford to spare some rations (In fact, Poe, Finn, Rose, even Leiah, had tried giving her more portions, but she found that after a certain amount it just gave her pain in the stomach, so she settled for eating only one portion as before). Now with Ben, however, she had been eating more. Mostly at his insistent, but he was very careful to make food that was light and wouldn’t give her a stomachache. Now she ate two portions a day.

             “I'm sorry,” He said, bringing her out of her reprieve, She didn’t realize he was done and his hands weren’t on her hair anymore. Instead, they were wrapped around her waist. His head was against her shoulder. She didn't know if that was directed at her.

                                                           ~*~