still figuring out how to properly use this site, and what to use it for.

I drank even more. we are at the karaoke right now. i would still kiss them. albeit, i know i am happy. this is where i am supposed to be. i know i am supposed to be. i don't need to kiss them. i am intoxicated, yes! but that's the whole point, isn't it? i am drunk, and this time, i am an adult. it's okay for me to be so, so, so happy, and to feel like this is supposed to be. maybe, my mother and my father felt the same way, long ago. ain't this a milestone of life? I am happy. maybe this is an important step of life. to be drunk and think, "this is it. I figured it out." life is so beautiful when you are an hour and and half from home, and you can be free. you can be who you are supposed to be, with the colourful spinning lights that make you really dizzy.

i ran to the bathroom in the middle of the party. drunk, yes, but not all of it it's because of the alcohol. my back against the wall, hoping so fucking much it was their back against the wall. i hope they can't see just how much i desire them. this desire that just straight up burns me from the inside

recently, I went to a wedding. it was the first time going to a church after a long, long time. i cried during the ceremony, while repeatedly thinking "please come back to me". i still don't know, more than a month later, if i really meant that to the nailed man in the back, or to you.