Server's Revenge

You’ve sent stories, and man my inbox is flooded! I’ll get to those soon, but the songs I’ve written for you guys are FINALLY on the SoundCloud.

Here’s the link: https://soundcloud.com/serversrevenge

Anyway, I thought you should know more about me.

THINGS I LOVE:

Broadway Musicals, duh.

My cat, Demeter of course.

Revenge

Tipping well when I eat out (will I be able to afford to eat out again?)

My dads

THINGS I HATE:

Bad tippers, obviously.

Old ladies who run their mouths.

People who hate cats, whether it’s CATS on Broadway or real cats. If you don’t like cats, I don’t trust you. 

When the unemployment website doesn’t load. If I can’t work right now, the website should at least work, LOL.

If you are a bad tipper who hates cats, get off my page! I’m looking for employment, but all these stories make me not want to work at a restaurant anymore. I think I should finally make the move to NYC…

One can dream.

Until next time, stay vengeful.

Keep submitting.

I was told a party of six was on the patio, so I of course bring out six waters. Only one person was at the table, and he says, “you need to leave my water and take the others back, it’s hot out.” I put the waters back on the tray, which is when he decides to give me a lesson in elementary science. He used a tone you would use when speaking to an eight-year-old. “When water is left out in the heat with ice on it, the glasses get wet. It’s called condensation,” he told me.

“Wow, that’s so crazy, I never knew that. I’ll sure remember that next time,” I responded, and he failed to pick up on any degree of sarcasm.

I guess the posters really got this page some traction! You’ve asked, and I hear you! I have eleven stories in my ask box right now, and one angry restaurant owner asking me to take my page down! Free speech, ever heard of it?

I wrote the song to accompany the first submission, I’ll be posting that here soon. Here’s a little preview (to the tune of “One” from A Chorus Line) “One singular incision, made this Karen hate her steak. One, little more incision, she’d see it was the perfect make.” She’s vile and suddenly turned against you. You never know what an angry rich old lady can do.”

Yesterday at work this lady ordered a medium filet. She finally ordered something after about 10000 questions, so I made sure to check on her a couple times. She cuts the filet at the very end and declares it “too fatty to eat.” I ask her if she could cut the middle and she says, "no, it's too fatty, I need to see a manager." So, I get my boss, and she demands a free 60$ steak. We do it for her, but my boss cuts up the steak and shows her that it was cooked a perfect medium. She asks if it is the same steak, and we say yes. She gets her new steak, and apparently, it's "too rare," now. She ended up leaving $8 on a 120$ check after running me around the whole night.

I was just fired from the restaurant; I won’t mention the name of the place just in case anyone from there finds me here. I got a table of one grumpy old man, and he was mad because I didn’t come to his table sooner… well no one told me you were even here! That’s not my fault. He calls me “Orphan Annie,” so I lean into that and say, “I’ll be right back, with a porter, bet ya’ this time your wait will be shorter,” to the tune of “Tomorrow” from Annie. Of course, that man wanted me to sing everything on the menu back to him, so I did, and I was happy to do it. I ran back and forth, singing. When he got his steak he kicked it across the room, he left without tipping. I’ve been doing this since I was seventeen and I’m tired. I ran after that man and told him right off, to the tune of “Phantom of the Opera.” I’d never felt freer than when I left that place. I just want to write Broadway songs.