˗ˏˋ𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓿𝓮𝓷 𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓽ˎˊ˗

We are so used to getting insulted that when people actually appreciate us, we either don’t know how to respond or mistake it for a sarcasm.

the cure to self-sabotage is to anchor yourself to the universal truth that you are worth it. you are worth the effort. you are worth the difficulty, you are worth the time, you are worth the consideration. there is never a point in your life, in time itself, that you are not worth it. return to this truth when you feel yourself slipping. do not let it go.

I’m angry at society for contributing to their abuse.

I’m angery at society for normalizing the abuse we went through, and that when ever we try to bring it ip so we can talk about these types of things, they say we’re just over sensitive.

I’m angry that I would be seen as ungrateful for saying something about the emotional trauma I went through, just because I was provided with nice things and a good education.

I’m angry at society telling me it’s not my parents fault.

I’m angry at society for making it seem like it was my fault, and that I deserved every horrible thing they’ve done to me

I’m mad at society for ignoring my abuse

I’m angry that when I spoke out about my abuse I was “being dramatic”

Im angry that people say its okay because i was a “hyper child” so it was okay to hit

I’m angry that when I tried to defend myself against his abuse, I was treated like the villain and taken away to Juvenile Hall for 13 months.

I’m angry that my parents only tried to do something about him until after I started telling other people about it, ruining their image as Good Parents

I’m angry that when I finally reached out to a teacher and spilled all my secrets to a social worker, when they called home (because it was a rule, they had to do it and the social worker I was talking to was very against it) and my dad came to pick me up, he dismissed everything with just, “you’ll be fine, you’re going through puberty.”

I’m angry that everyone blames my hatred towards my parents as “teenage hormones” when really it’s because of all the abuse everyone blatantly ignores.

I’m angry that my parents forced us to act like we were fine the first time CPS was called on them then cut us off from the family that actually loved us for years after CPS didn’t take us away.

i’m angry at all the “friends” (read: enablers) who turned a blind eye to me/my parents and did everything from belittling and ignoring me to attacking my character when i insisted i was in danger and needed help

the bpd thing where you spiral over the tiniest things so much to the point you can’t tell if somethings actually wrong or if you’re just that fucked up like you don’t know what to believe and all your time is spent unsure of what is actually happening, like you’re never going to fully trust anything because your reality is just that distorted

one day our meat will start beating back

if something makes you go ’!!!!’ inside it’s worth keeping around