Secret Agent Lizzo

https://youtu.be/HcA5S9DZnLg

moderately anticipated video rendition of whatever was going on in the notes of this post

What did I forget?? Pls weigh in, as demanded by the lordt 👼 🍑

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2fty7MKGpdRDAF0H0UnEwa?si=-zwGq_CYT_mDbpx63-D6Lw&dl_branch=1

Hello I have not drawn or posted fan art in 15 years but spn has sucked me back in. There will never be peace. Look at them look at their noses the worms are wRIThing. Thank u enjoy ❤️

John doesn’t ask Bobby if they can stay–he pretty much just dumps Dean and Sam on the porch and drives off. Dean hears the squeal of Bobby’s front door opening as he watches the Impala’s tail lights fade into the distance. 

Bobby didn’t plan to take care of them, so they end up going to the grocery store at nine pm. Sam gets excited about everything–riding in the cart, getting to choose what kind of bread they have, carefully holding the egg carton, telling Bobby how this is the most they’ve had to eat in weeks.

(Dean carefully avoids Bobby’s gaze when Sam says that.)

The next day is a Sunday, and at breakfast Bobby tells them that he’s signing them up for some free summer program at the Boys and Girls Club downtown. 

“There’ll be other kids your age,” Bobby says. “It’ll be good for you.” 

The first day, Monday, Dean lasts until pool time after lunch. 

“You can’t drown the other kids,” Bobby says sternly in the truck, a dripping-wet Dean in the passengers seat. 

“They were pullin’ Sammy’s hair,” Dean complains.

“Ignore ‘em.”

Tuesday’s not much better–some other kid at lunch says they’re “weird” because they don’t have a mom, so Dean dumps his milk carton out onto that kid’s head. 

“You just said I couldn’t drown anyone,” Dean says to Bobby’s stern face when he picks him up. 

“I also said to ignore ‘em.”

Wednesday: Dean shoves someone on the playground for teasing Sam about the soles of his sneakers falling off. 

Thursday: another boy makes fun of Dean for “eating too fast.” Dean leaves with a split lip. 

Friday: the secretary at the club tells Bobby regretfully, “We can’t keep Dean anymore.”

“What about Sam?” Bobby asks.

“He’s been an angel.” The secretary beams at Sam. “You can go inside the gym with the other kids.”

Sam’s lip wobbles. “I’m not goin’ without Dean.” He grabs Dean’s hand.

Dean bends down to his brother’s height. “I’m sorry, Sammy. You gotta go by yourself.”

“Don’t wanna.”

“Sucks.” Dean ruffles Sam’s hair. “Go on, go play with your friends.”

The secretary really does look sorry. 

The whole ride back to Bobby’s, Dean’s sure he’s gonna get it. If his dad was around, well…

Dean’s glad his dad’s not around. 

“Get out of the truck,” Bobby says after skidding into the drive, and then he gestures for Dean to follow him into the house. 

Bobby pours himself some coffee. 

Dean waits. 

Bobby drinks his coffee.

Dean waits.

“I got a Pontiac in the yard that needs work,” Bobby finally says. “You wanna help?”

“What–help?” Dean stares at him. “You’re not mad at me?”

“Oh, I’m mad, but shoutin’ at you ain’t gonna fix anything.” Bobby stoops down to Dean’s level, mirroring Dean and Sam’s conversation from half an hour before. “When a kid says shit about you or your brother, that ain’t a reflection on you. It’s a reflection on them. But you can’t just lash out at ‘em every time, okay? You wanna be frustrated? That’s fine. Then you gotta find another way to get that frustration out.” 

Dean keeps staring. The room is getting blurry.

“You can cry, too,” Bobby says. 

“Dad said–”

“Screw your dad. Boys can cry, and if you don’t you might explode.”

Dean cries. 

Then they go fix up that Pontiac. 

But the man playing the manly dude said “what if beneath the big gun and the big car and the leather jacket there was a soft, bruised, open heart?”

And then the writers said nothing, because they were on strike, so the manly man with the soft, bruised, open heart went to Hell.

And a woman with a big imagination said “what if there were angels and one pulled him out of Hell?”

And then the guy playing the angel who pulled the manly dude out of Hell said “what if the angel was gay?”

And thousands of queer little voices responded “and what if the angel and the manly man fell into a love so big and profound and deep that it deconstructed the male power fantasy invented free will and saved the world?”