tags: joined nde, double whump, hurt Buck, competent Eddie, angst with a happy ending, getting together, friends to lovers; Eddie Theo is very special to me
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tags: joined nde, double whump, hurt Buck, competent Eddie, angst with a happy ending, getting together, friends to lovers; Eddie Theo is very special to me
buddie trope i love: when eddie thinks he’s being clear about demonstrating his romantic/sexual interest in buck without explicitly saying it and is having a great time dating buck while buck believes his heterosexual best friend has decided to start emotionally torturing him
[the inside of eddie’s head] yay another date tonight. i know we’ve been taking it slow but it’s been nice just being allowed to hold hands and cuddle
[the inside of buck’s head] Why why why why why oh my god i can’t have him he’s straight why is he acting like this is it normal for bros to hold hands why is he doing this to me i’m so pathetically in love with him why why why why why
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was considering my ideal 'eddie finds out about The Competition conundrum' scenario but now i am stirring a big simmering pot of ruminations in my Mind about a world in which eddie is not in the dark about tommy seeing him as competition, not because buck tells him about that conversation, but because he himself already had a similar one with tommy.
'he stopped talking to me after you and i broke up' as a slight lie of omission because eddie stopped talking to him after a conversation that took place at buck's loft the day after the billy boils incident while buck was busy poking at his face in the mirror and the other two were just sort of awkwardly sharing space in their collective BoyFriend's home like
"I'm sorry you had to drive all the way over here, man. I told him I could handle it."
"No big deal," Eddie shrugs, arms crossed and leaning back against the counter. His med bag is still open on the table and he's intermittently sipping a coffee he made for himself without asking permission.
"Right," Tommy pulls a face that he's pulled at least half a dozen times since Eddie arrived. He doesn't elaborate.
"I just mean," Eddie pushes up against the tension in the air, "it's what we do. He'd show up for me the same way."
"No," Tommy laughs drily, "I'm not confused about that, trust me."
Without tearing his gaze away from that look on Tommy's face, the one he's still pulling in a slightly different font, Eddie reaches out and picks up his coffee from the counter with practiced, blind ease. He frowns as he takes a long sip. He isn't sure what to say to that and so he doesn't say anything at all.
He doesn't need to, really, when Tommy goes on all on his own.
"There are some situations where you don't show up for each other though, right?"
"Not sure I catch your drift," Eddie chuckles, head tilting with the momentum of his confusion.
Tommy studies him, like trying to suss him out, and then sighs.
"Nevermind."
"Okay," Eddie lets it go.
He tries to let it go, only, Tommy is trying to win some foot-in-mouth contest, apparently because--
"I'm just trying not to feel like I always have to compete for my boyfriend's attention, I guess is what I'm saying," he blurts out with a large, half-aborted gesture that startles Eddie aback with his mug halfway lifted to his lips.
He lowers it carefully.
He pulls a face of his own.
"Compete with who?"
Tommy stalls for a beat before he barks out a laugh. He looks at Eddie like he thinks he's stupid or something, which isn't the most pleasant experience. Eddie has gotten along just fine with Tommy for months, now, but all of a sudden it feels like Tommy isn't getting along with him and Eddie can't parse why.
"Come on, Diaz," he scoffs, "you're not that dense."
He's looking him up and down like he's reading him and Eddie doesn't care for it at all, actually. He feels transparent and he feels brittle and he opens his mouth to say something, although he has no hope of planning ahead for what, only--
"Eddie! C'mere for a sec!" Buck calls, loud and demanding from the bathroom upstairs. "Bring your bag!"
Tommy's once-over breaks, but only because he shakes his head with this frigid sort of unsurprised frustration, and only then does Eddie pick up what he's been putting down.
His jaw hinges open, just ever so slightly, and he understands the meaning of gobsmacked for perhaps the first time in his life and--
"Eddie?!"
"You gonna keep him waiting?" Tommy asks with an edge of mockery and Eddie purses his lips as he sets down his coffee and trades it out for his med bag.
He strides forward, but as he passes by, drops hand to shoulder.
"I'm not competing with you, Tommy," he says flatly with barely a pause in his step to do so.
He's a third of the way up the staircase when he catches the sigh at his back and hears the mostly-muttered, "no, you're really not, are you," that chases him up.
In all technicality, they're on the same page, but they don't really talk much after that.
Anyway, it's only a couple weeks later when Tommy breaks up with Buck, when Buck shows up on Eddie's doorstep, when Eddie is the first one to get him to smile and laugh again in a post-breakup world to the tune of loud, loud music and where are your goddamn pants, man?
It's the beer, probably, and the dancing endorphins, that makes a ghost of a thought drift across Eddie's brain:
“Uh, I think the kids are saying sick now,” Buck jabs, looking down at himself, and decidedly not mourning Eddie’s touch once he lets go of his arm.
“Do I even wanna know who the president was when you got that thing? It’s gonna split in half,” Eddie comments—eyes remaining on his arms, wandering from one to the next, and then back. Almost as if he’s… admiring the way the leather emphasizes Buck’s size. In his dreams, he supposes.
“Oh, that's not fair—don't insult my costume, you barely even had to dress up!”
“The hell does that mean? Excuse me, your kid wanted us to be Zuko and Kenickie, and I’m delivering. This jacket—” he pops the collar for emphasis. “—was not cheap.”
tags: joined nde, double whump, hurt Buck, competent Eddie, angst with a happy ending, getting together, friends to lovers; Eddie Theo is very special to me
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the Chris of it all in Fear-O-Phobia is so so dizzying because he heard the sounds from Eddie's room and decided to call Buck. not 911, who would be the first emergency approach in case of danger, but Buck. and then he waited right there, outside Eddie's door, till Buck came home. the fear of what was happening must have been overwhelming but also the sheer trust that this was the way to go? the way his first instinct is to reach Buck? the way Eddie is able to let his guard down and speak his mind in the safety of his home BECAUSE it was Buck. the way Chris dragged safety into the house in the form of Buck because he has formed that connection in his head after the tsunami and the shooting; that the one who comes for both him and Eddie is always Buck. the concept of making your safe place safe again by bringing your safe PERSON into it.
old (like oct 2025) study collage wip i still want to finish but its on my sadlonely ipad i dont use anymore so god knows when....anyways i still like it as is so im putting it here Just imagine it finished And it looks really good.
I haven’t followed spn for 5-6 years, and haven’t been in any fandom for almost twice as much, but hoooo boy did all this nonsence suck me in.
so here’s a picture of our dear queer angel with too much heart (and he will always be loved in all the languages)
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So I’ve been thinking. About you – us. About the beginning. How everything could have gone so many different ways, and it didn’t. It all went the way it did, and I got to know you.
I got to marry you.
His hand moves to his chest pocket – taps it twice, over the name etched there.
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