Fragile Dreams

Baby boomers have to switch life situations with a millennial for a year. The millennial gets to live in their house (which they paid off like thirty or forty years ago) and work at their job that provides a good salary and benefits. The baby boomer has to live in the millennial’s shitty, overpriced apartment and struggle to pay rent and work a minimum wage part-time job as well as an unpaid internship in their (the baby boomer’s) field. 

Play in the sewers

Build a bridge out of birds

Buy 5200 thrushes, or any number of thrushes for that matter

Mention sea cats in any context, but especially a playable one

Waifu the same NPCs on subsequent playthroughs (The Don and Bryan Waifu Rule)

Make the DM ship even more goddamn ships involving the time traveling sad lesbian

Argue with the DM on how much damage a thrown frying pan can do

Debate with the DM about the merits of an ear trumpet or a tennis kit in combat

Buy ear trumpets or tennis kits to use them in combat

Look for genocidal, murderous spiders in castles, or anywhere else, really, unless they’re the small dragon cleric

Bring horses to space stations

Ask gods of immense power for horses

Be a local lord in areas where they don’t speak local languages

Be a local lord at all

Ask why humans are called “humans”

Name their character after another player but with two letters rearranged, be it by accident or not, especially if it’s at 3am when the DM checks new character sheets and doesn’t realize the ramifications of the name

Have +3 Natural AC for no adequately explored reason

Pester the DM to roll for divine intervention

Ask about the genitalia of fictional species

WHAAAAAT UP!

Yeah I got bored and thought, Why are you such a grumpy douche Rick? Go to the Garage and transfer your mind into a Cat version of yourself and get embroiled in some internet hijinks!