I am broken.

Is it time to die yet? Please say yes

Ive made too many promises to people who that no longer care and Im not sure why I keep them...

You can't tell me that everything is okay and you're just busy and then being always online and ignoring me for days. You're a liar.. You used to like me more, that's a fact. You just pushed me to the perifery because I'm not as good as you thought.

Do you ever feel like you miss out on life, because you are not able to socialize the way most people do?

I try to be happy about this at first, No one is afraid lose me because im reliable.... But then the thought is maybe they dont care

Even if I wanted to talk... Even if I wanted to vent... I can't articulate what I feel.

And I am worried Ive done it again so uhh neat

You know what I miss? When I was their favorite person. It seems like it was forever ago, and it stinks because it wasn’t. I can remember the exact date they stopped taking to me with effort. I can remember when they slipped through my fingertips, when i thought it was impossible. I hate to admit it to myself, but I really miss them because now I feel like I’m missing a piece. I miss them for who they used to be.

I’ll forever be the person who says "It’s okay, I understand" even when my heart is literally shattering.

I’m jealous of those who can function like a normal human being. They don’t have anxiety holding them back from everything, they don’t struggle to get out of bed or have to put on an act that everything is fine when its not. They don’t struggle to hold friendships and relationships… they don’t feel sad for no fucking reason everyday. Those that can hold jobs and work towards their dreams, the ones who have self esteem and see the beauty in themselves. Those that know what its like to feel safe and secure, not insecure and fearful of it all.