Live a life of oh wells not what ifs

They actually bought all the fucking apple juice

ooh no they love orange juice but they been bad *swipes whole shelf*

why do old people read the bible so much

i asked the old guy standing in front of me at the post office and he said “it’s because we’re cramming for finals”

the moral of frankenstein is if youre going to build a monster out of dead body parts dont make him like 8 feet tall and super strong

or just love your super strong 8 feet tall son

Like, don’t abandon him because you are scared of him. Like you met him a second ago. He just wants a family

The moral of the story is that you need to be prepared for the realities of parenthood before you commit. Sometimes you get what you expected, sometimes you get an eight foot tall super strong patchwork zombie child, sometimes you get neither of those things. No take-backs.

lets start wearing cloaks and swords again. its time

how do u wear a sword

on your hip like a normal person. or on your back if youre a dumb anime dweeb

I’m too short to wear mine on my hip what do 

daggers

but I already spent 400$ on this sick ass sword

strapped to your back it is then

This cat would get everything from me

yeah this cat has such a big eyed woe-is-me that it could have everything it ever asked for

Actual photos of me for the last two weeks.

what if death is just level 2

I never played a level one that was this fucking hard

Petition for Chris Evans to put on the captain America outfit and physically fight Donald trump

If you follow his twitter, I think he is like *this close*