The Freak Circus X Poppy Playtime

“What does the Prototype understand by loving someone? Lily tells him, ‘Say you love me,’ and a few panels later he says, ‘I could have loved you, but…’ Are they both on the same understanding of love?”

I could have simply answered “no”. But I think this question allows us to explore something very important about Lily and the Prototype: they are both capable of love, but they never learned how to love in the same way.

.

How does Lily love?

In the game, Lily seems deeply obsessed with the Prototype. She constantly invites him to her parties, considers him her best friend despite their very limited interactions, and convinces herself that he loves her: “He loves me more than anyone.”

In my opinion, Lily creates a reality where she is no longer alone. When she is confronted with the truth, she feels such rejection and such a loss of control that she escapes into denial and anger.

In my AU, she finally gets the chance to explore this obsession through a real relationship. Her idealization of the Prototype slowly evolves into something more concrete: conversations, looks, attention, intimacy.

But Lily is still Lily.

She is not particularly good at listening or understanding other people's emotions, and she tends to project her own feelings onto them.

“If I love the Prototype this way, then he must love me the same way.”

Because of this, she may overinterpret the smallest signs of affection. A simple “hello” can become, in her mind: “You missed me. You thought about me as much as I thought about you.”

What she truly wants is an fusional relationship. Someone who allows her to never feel alone again.

And this is probably what she unconsciously asks for when she says:

“Say that you love me.”

.

And what does love mean to the Prototype?

This is much more complicated.

In my interpretation, the Prototype is perfectly capable of attachment, but he has almost never been exposed to a healthy form of affection.

In Sleep Well, for example, he places his hand on Catnap’s shoulder. In Wrongside Out, we can also see a brief moment of hesitation when he hears Poppy begging to be freed from her cage and seems to realizes that she is suffering.

These small moments make me feel like, behind all his cruelty, there is a character who is capable of affection and even empathy, but who simply does not know what to do with these feelings.

In my AU, his story reinforces this idea even more. He grew up surrounded by hatred, violence, manipulation, and rejection. Because of this, he started repeating what he had always known and became extremely distrustful of others.

For him, the smallest betrayal or inconsistency can become something huge. Other people have always given him reasons not to trust them.

Catnap is probably the exception.

He proved his loyalty for long enough to become someone the Prototype can trust. But their relationship is still very particular: Catnap idolizes him so much that a certain distance remains between them.

And then Lily arrives.

She talks to him about intimacy in a way he has probably never experienced before. She tells him that his home can be his special place. That he can be himself with her. That she wants to care about what he feels rather than what other people think about him. Without even realizing it, she cracks something in the walls he built around himself.

The Prototype starts wanting to trust her. And that is exactly what scares him : He thought he was lying to himself by pretending to be kind to Lily. Then he starts wondering if he is actually lying to himself by pretending that he wants to destroy her.

He realizes that he is once again putting himself at risk of being hurt. (This is especially why he needs to ask Catnap if Lily is truly someone he can trust.)

.

So… what does the Prototype understand by “love” in general ?

I think he mainly associates love with affection, attachment, kindness, loyalty, and actions that prove that someone will not lie to him or betray him. Someone who stays. Someone who does not want to hurt him. Someone who is willing to do things for him.

He is capable of love, but he knows very few ways to express it. The way he loves is clumsy, distrustful, and can even become aggressive, to the point of hurting the people he cares about.

I like the idea that he is the kind of character who destroys everything he touches without meaning to.

And that is exactly why he does not understand what Lily means when she says she loves him. He wants to believe her. He wants to understand what she feels.

But to him, “I love you” first sounds like a promise he does not know how to interpret.

Because he has never truly experienced something like this before.

And this is where I find Lily and the Prototype particularly interesting: they are very similar, but for different reasons.

They are both afraid of loneliness. They are both desperately looking for someone who can make them feel less alone. They both project a lot of things onto the other person.

But Lily tries to merge with someone to escape her loneliness, while the Prototype learned to push people away to protect himself from suffering.

.

So, to answer both questions:

What does the Prototype understand by loving someone?

For him, loving someone probably means affection, attachment, loyalty, and actions that prove that he can trust that person. Someone who stays. Someone who does not lie. Someone who does not betray him.

Are they both on the same understanding of love?

Not exactly.

Lily and the Prototype are ultimately looking for a similar form of emotional security: someone who can make them feel like they don't have to be alone anymore. But they reach it through two completely different paths.

Lily looks for a relationship based on fusion: “Love me the way I love you.”

The Prototype, on the other hand, is looking above all for proof that he can trust someone: “Prove to me that I can trust you.”

They do not completely speak the same emotional language. But I do not think their views are incompatible. (Even if I am not sure that either of them has a particularly healthy vision of love. :'))

. .

Well... that was a lot longer than expected, sorry about that! :')

I really enjoyed exploring this topic, though. I hope I’ll have the chance to do more discussions like this in the future! And I hope I didn’t go too far away from the original question... again. (School traumas, haha.)