Floria. Neutral good bard/alchemist. Bi-ish demi-everything woman-shaped being of the world (she/her). Lacto-veg carbohydrate enthusiast. Adult: old enough to have seen Spice World in theaters. Weird Girl NOS. Frivolous in an analytical sort of way. Way too fond of bad puns. I support public libraries, bully breeds, and the Oxford Comma. The Moral High Ground is no substitute for doing right by people. I mostly blog about silly fandom things, cute animals, and my army of OCs, with occasional forays into more serious topics. Most of what I put up is work safe, and I tag what isn't. I don't normally use trigger warnings unless I'm discussing something with a fair amount of depth or detail, and I don't usually warn for phobias. But if you want/need me to warn for something specific, *please* let me know! (The Angry Marsupials in question are a reference to the Civil Internet Discourse Tasmanian Devils macros I made a while back.)
Ice Cream Project of the Day: Cake Batter Frozen Pudding
No cream, no eggs, no exotic stabilizers. 100% ingredients I already had on hand.
1/4 cup butter
1/3 cup dry yellow cake mix
2 T homemade "golden syrup"
1/4 cup granulated sugar
2 T powdered milk (I used about half toasted powdered milk because I had some left over from a previous project, and the rest out of the package)
2 cups whole milk
Make a roux with the butter and cake mix, cook until it bubbles and starts to smell good. Mix the powdered milk with the whole milk. Gradually add the milk mixture to the roux, stirring all the way (like you're making white sauce). When the milk's warmed up, add the sugar and syrup. Keep stirring. Cook and stir until the mixture thickens up. Let it cool, chill in the fridge as long as you can stand it. When you run out of patience, freeze as usual in ice cream freezer. Then put it in the freezer to firm up for at least a few hours.
(This part is where I am now, so I don't know how it turns out yet.)
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Ice Cream Project of the Day: Cake Batter Frozen Pudding
No cream, no eggs, no exotic stabilizers. 100% ingredients I already had on hand.
1/4 cup butter
1/3 cup dry yellow cake mix
2 T homemade "golden syrup"
1/4 cup granulated sugar
2 T powdered milk (I used about half toasted powdered milk because I had some left over from a previous project, and the rest out of the package)
2 cups whole milk
Make a roux with the butter and cake mix, cook until it bubbles and starts to smell good. Mix the powdered milk with the whole milk. Gradually add the milk mixture to the roux, stirring all the way (like you're making white sauce). When the milk's warmed up, add the sugar and syrup. Keep stirring. Cook and stir until the mixture thickens up. Let it cool, chill in the fridge as long as you can stand it. When you run out of patience, freeze as usual in ice cream freezer. Then put it in the freezer to firm up for at least a few hours.
(This part is where I am now, so I don't know how it turns out yet.)
Shiny New Australia: Mad Max in the Palapagos. I'm torn between having everyone ride around on Pals like they do in the game, or introducing original vehicle worldbuilding because it's not really Mad Max without tricked out cars&c. (Petroleum does canonically exist in Palworld, so people could continue to fuel any surviving gasoline-powered cars from the Old World, but all the large-scale oil rigs are under control of the islands' big crime syndicate which would make fuelling a fleet of vehicles problematic. I'm wondering, given the existence of small fire and electricity-generating creatures in the game, if either steampunk steam-buggies with a Foxsparks in the back running the boiler, or rechargeable Jolthog-powered electric cars might be more practical under the circumstances.) Or split the difference and go with tricked-out war chariots. Also there is a wasteland warlord called the Plant Pimp whose special resource is vegetable gardening. He has a bodyguard harem of flower ladies. Lily murders him with extreme prejudice.
Fuddler On The Roof: After being evicted from their hometown, a group of Jewish villagers from Imperial Russia get help finding new homes from a philanthropic group devoted to helping persecuted Jews relocate to areas with more economic opportunity and less antisemitism. (This was a thing in real life in the late 19th/very early 20th centuries.) However, instead of the US or Argentina, these folks got sent to the Palapagos. How do you maintain your sense of identity and cultural continuity when all the old eternal verities, including simple things like "sheep have hooves," are in flux? When the Psalms talked about singing the Lord's song in a strange land, did they know how strange lands could get?
Little House in the Islands: Pa's restless pioneer spirit gets the best of him yet again, and the Ingalls family sets off on their most far-flung journey yet. Will the Palapagos Islands' promise of free land, abundant natural resources, and boundless opportunity be true for the Ingallses, or will they all get eaten by monsters?
Constantly torn between "keep my mouth shut and risk people thinking I dislike them" and "participate in the conversation and risk my words getting away from me and saying something unprofessional" at work.
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From the University of Kentucky’s Art Museum, William Welsh’s grand painting Burlesque Queen (1941) … I like the University’s official description: “She wears her corpulence—and skimpy costume—with confidence and ease.“
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In distant lands full of wild landscapes and unfamiliar people, a wilderness guide is an explorer’s best friend. While they lack the advanced mystical abilities of druids or the combat skill of rangers, wilderness guides are skilled at survival, pathfinding, frontier diplomacy, and assisting their companions.
Class Skills: A wilderness guide loses Disable Device and Sleight of Hand and gains Handle Animal and Survival.
Weapon and Armor Proficiencies: Wilderness guides are proficient with all simple weapons, shortbows, handaxes and throwing axes, and machetes. They are proficient with light armor.
Nature Magic: A wilderness guide casts spells from the druid and ranger spell lists as a hunter of her investigator level, except her casting stat is Intelligence instead of Wisdom. This replaces alchemy.
Inspiration: A wilderness guide can use inspiration for free on Survival checks but not Spellcraft checks. This alters inspiration.
Pathfinding: A wilderness guide gains a bonus equal to half her level to Survival checks to follow tracks, avoid natural hazards or avoid getting lost. This replaces trapfinding.
Toxin Lore: A wilderness guide understands the hazards of the natural world and how to protect herself and her allies. A Level 2 wilderness guide can spend one minute attempting a Knowledge (Nature) check equal to the poison’s DC to identify a natural poison or venom (either by examining the source of the poison or a creature affected by it) and may spend one minute and a Profession (Herbalist) or Heal check either to neutralize one dose of it, or give herself and a number of allies equal to her intelligence bonus a +4 bonus to saving throws against this type of poison for one hour. She can use Knowledge (Nature) instead of Heal to treat poison. This alters poison lore.
Traveler’s Endurance: At 2nd level a wilderness guide gains a +2 bonus to saving throws and Constitution checks against fatigue and the effects of hot and cold environments. These bonuses increase to +4 at 5th level and +6 at 8th level. At 11th level, the wilderness guide becomes immune to fatigue and gains the benefit of a constant endure elements spell. This replaces poison resistance.
Frontier Diplomacy: A 3rd level wilderness guide can attempt Diplomacy checks to improve the attitudes of intelligent beings with whom she has no common language. She can also use Linguistics checks to attempt to communicate in the absence of a shared language - DC 15 for basic concepts, DC 20 for more complicated or abstract ones, DC 25 for a real conversation. A successful Sense Motive check at the same DC from her conversation partner gives her a +2 bonus on the check. This replaces trap sense.
Provisioner: When a 4th level wilderness guide makes a Survival check to provide food and water, she can provide food and water for an additional number of creatures equal to her Intelligence bonus. This replaces swift alchemy.
Investigator Talents: As well as the usual pool of investigator talents, a wilderness guide may select the following options:
Terrain Mastery (as the rogue talent), Camouflage (as the rogue talent), Philologist (as the rogue talent), Woodland Stride (as the ranger ability - must be at least 7th level), Inspire Competence (as a bard of half their investigator level), Animal Friend (as the animal speaker bard ability), Expert Explorer (as the feat), Xenoglossy (as the feat), Altitude Affinity (as the feat), Animal Ally (as the feat - must be at least 4th level), Live Off the Land (as the feat), Rhabdomancy (as the feat), Insightful Advice (as the feat), Wild Empathy (as a druid of half their investigator level)
My boyfriend was on lunch duty at his school yesterday and a little boy came up to him and asked him about his tattoos. When he got to the one of Bigfoot getting beamed up by aliens, the boy said “Were you born in Seattle?” And my boyfriend goes “……yes?” And the little boy knowingly goes “yeah I can tell”
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