GUN TO YA' HEAD,

i bet parasitic insects say shit like “have a lice day🤗” and “you’ve ticked me off😡”

Noobnouns vs pronouns vs hackernouns

the alphabet says HI but it doesnt actually mean it bcause it said JK afterwards what a fucken asshole

Cannibalism as a metaphor for watching yo mama compilations at age 27

I get so crunk off that apple juice

I will forever love that tiny bit of the gala scene where Adrian is discouraged because Nova didn’t come to the Gala and he’s like “you know maybe it was for the best, I need to keep the sentinel a secret and if I date Nova I probably couldn’t tell her, a relationship would never work😔😔😔😔” and then she walks in looking like a goddess in her dress and Adrian is just like “scratch that, a relationship makes total sense and would totally work, I don’t know why I ever doubted it 😻😻😻😻”

“vampires cant enter a house without being invited in” yeah neither can i the homeowners tend to call the cops when u do that