close your eyes, cross your heart, and hope. @saturrrday - Tumblr Blog

urggggh you know things must fucking suck when i come running back to tumblr for one line emo posts

#pghrijdklw;'aS;#DFGWRHTEYRMFGNBCVUREGNHH

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Welcome to Episode: your home for interactive, visual stories, where as the player YOU choose what path your character takes!

kevinskeller

metadefumaca

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dailyswiftgifs

mrs-next-match

Make Us Dream

nostopdasgay

peachersen

It’s a monumental overask to expect women to be gentle with the egos of men who only feigned friendship in order to get laid.

(via vintagevandalizm)

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when you have a shit blog and someone follows you

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thecheesyllama

So whenever my hearing aids run out of battery, a deep-ass man’s voice goes off right next to my ear drum yelling “B A T T E R Y”, and, every time, without fail, giving me a minor heart attack.

And since my hearing aids aren’t synched for when I replace the battery, the left hearing aid will go off one afternoon, and I’ll know that the right one will go off the following night.

Yesterday afternoon, I replaced my left hearing aid battery.

Now it is tomorrow night. Now I sit, and I wait, for that monotone-ass motherfucker in my head to yell “BATTERY” in my ear, again leading to my gradual heart failure. It is only so long before my heart cannot take this repeated occurrence of panic.

I sit.

I wait.

He is coming.

alyciajazmin

(◕‿◕✿)

rupikaur-deactivated20170926

just-shower-thoughts

If Jesus was born from a virgin birth, doesn’t that mean he has only an X chromosome. Wouldn’t that make him female?

nominominus

wait

danimolloy-deactivated20240131

TRANS JESUS TRANS JESUS TRANS JESUS

vrxskasxrkxt

I have taken 3 years of Theology, 1 of Apologetics, and 1 of Anatomy and Physiology and I’m honesty stumped by this one

fsthhdwefg-deactivated20180515

Those species which are parthenogenic (i.e. self-fertilising, certain lizards, snakes, frogs and fish) the offspring is always genetically/physically female-typical. So yeah, if we were to take the nativity as a scientific story, a parthenogenic human pregnancy (still a scientific impossibility) would result in an AFAB child, and since that child has always been referred to as “he”, voila, trans jesus.

kjorteo

Actually, I think that depends on species? Like, New Mexico whiptail lizards are an entirely female all-parthenogensis all-the-time species, but Komodo dragon parthenogensis always results in males because their chromosome determination is different.

So clearly, to get to the bottom of this mystery, the first question we need to ask is what kind of reptile was Mary.

fsthhdwefg-deactivated20180515

Tumblr, asking the real questions

mustardprecum

Raptor Jesus born of a Raptor virgin.

prodigalqueer

Merry Christmas, y'all.

pacsgal

I’m crying 😂

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cum-martini

YA Book: wHite yoUng girl!!!1!

YA Book: sHe is difFERenT!!!!!1!!@

YA Book: speciAL pOWer!!!-!!

YA Book: cute boY love HeR!!!

YA Book: bUTttttt

Ya Book: anOTher boy alsO??? love heR?!?!??!!!

Ya Book: HOw will sHe cHOOse!!?!?!?!?1!! aNd save wORld?????!?!!

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