shibe mom

me: oh um, hello, i was here for a job interview last week and i was just wondering how it went? *clenches teeth and holds my breath*

employer: oh sorry the job opening went to someone else

Chris Crooked out of Lowrider Tattoo in Fountain Valley, CA.

“When your dog satys NO - whoa there sassy pants!”

Voice: Gimme your paw!

Dog: RHOO

Voice: WOAH! Gimme your paw.

Dog: Rhooo

Voice: No? Gimme your paw. Gimme.

Because I have been too lazy to type this all up.

Quartz:

If your quartz has teeny air bubbles it’s glass.

If it’s got a fruit name it’s dyed. End of story. (strawberry, cherry, lemon, pineapple, blueberry) yes there may be some very rare exceptions-fire quartz being dubbed strawberry- but due to the rise in fakes with that name it’s generally called fire quartz now.

Aura quartz is a regular quartz that’s been bonded with another material. (man made)

Cinnabar Infused Quartz usually reconstituted and mixed together to make a red crystal.

Green quartz can be grown in a lab and anything that forrest green color is

Turquoise:

Magnesite and howlite look very very similar to turquoise when they’ve been dyed, magnesite will have very deep cracks in it though.

No there is no white turquoise. 

You can do a uv test to see if it’s real

Amber

Often faked with Copal. They look nearly identical.

Amber will float in salt water-copal will not.

Irradiated/dyed stones:

Very vibrant colors!!

Irradiated: (they irradiate the crystals to get a deeper or more vibrant color)

deeply pigmented topaz or kunzite

dark (almost black) smokey quartz 

very deep pink or red tourmaline 

colored diamonds 

some cultured pearls 

vibrant yellow heliodor 

Dyed:

Pearls

Agate

coral

other stones may be dyed as well, generally if it looks fake..it is.

Heat treated stones: (really not a bad thing but if you’re going for natural)

Amethyst-lighten color+remove brown

Citrine-heat treated amethyst.

Aquamarine-remove green

Ruby-clearer stone 

Sapphire-clearer stone

Rainbow Cal-Silica

Nope, completely fake 100%

Literally just car paint layered with calcite and resin.

Citrine: (im so sorry)

Much of the citrine on the market is lab made.

If it’s lab made it’s usually amethyst that’s been heated until it changes color

The bottom of these stones will be white with more color at the tips.

srry

Lapis Lazuli:

High quality is vibrant blue, hard to come by, and very expensive.

Low quality howlite, jasper or sodalite is dyed blue, and passed off as lapis.

Acetone will remove the dye but damage the stone.

Obsidian:

The clear green obsidian you see all over ebay is slag glass.

Natural green obsidian has been found but it is opaque and is more gray than green.

there is red obsidian as well but again, it’s not a vibrant red and is more brick colored.

Wikipedia is not always right.

Goldstone:

it’s glass it’s legitimately just glass

Opalite:

also glass. 

real opalite exists but it’s green and not commonly found

once again, don’t believe everything on wikipedia.

Bismuth:

Doesn’t naturally form in the crystals, lab made!!!

rlly pretty though

Hematite:

Not naturally magnetic!

Magnetic hematite is 100% man made!

Real jade is p. heavy! A way to tell if it is real is that it’ll be heavier than it looks.

Jade is faked with the following:

Serpentine “New Jade” or “Olive Jade”

Prehnite

Aventurine quartz

Grossular garnet “Transvaal jade”

Chrysoprase “Australian jade”

Malaysia Jade- dyed quartz that may be called by its color – Red Jade, Yellow Jade, Blue Jade

Opaque dolomite marble “Mountain Jade” (usually dyed)

Dragon vein agate: 

Quench cracked, bleached, and dyed agate and some is quench cracked, and dyed glass.

Snowflake obsidian:

Being faked with a very low grade cheap dalmatian jasper.!

Snowflake will be gray while Dalmatian should have a lighter color

Hollow galena:

A lot of pieces have been proven to have been faked through sand blasting + similar techniques (but there may be real ones I’m not 100%)

Charoite:

Chinese Charoite doesn’t exist.

If it’s called that then it’s not real, real charoite isn’t banded and is more swirly.

Moldavite:

Very very commonly faked!!

Biggest giveaway is the ‘wet’ look a faked piece has due to the molding process

White moldavite doesn’t exist!!

Sunspar:

Andara Crystal

no such thing

massive scam

Quartz actually can have air bubbles/fluid inclusions, its not necessarily glass if it has that. Personally i like to tell if something is a real quartz crystal if it has horizontal striations on the faces. If the faces dont have striations, the stone is either 1) fake/glass 2) artificially carved or 3) grew in an unusually stable environment