A Reality to Be Experienced

Later in the evening that day, Rafael Barba made his way towards a less noisy part of New York, a place where the trees were more abundant and the apartments further apart. The car he rode in stopped in front of a blue and white townhouse, flowers blooming in the front garden with a small porch swing swaying in the cool summer breeze. He paid the driver, grabbed his briefcase and jacket, leaving the car and heading up the steps to the townhouse. He didn’t need to knock, procuring a key from his pocket and entering the humble abode. He quietly slipped off his shoes and places his case and jacket on the table near the front entrance. A chubby tabby cat bounded up to him, rubbing against his legs affectionately. Barba reached down and petted the cat softly, smiling faintly at the feline.

“Rafa? Is that you?” (Y/N) came out of the kitchen, and apron tied around her waist, flour staining the light yellow fabric. A smile graced her features at the sight of him. “I figured it was you the way Tink ran out of here like a bat out of hell.” She came closer to him, pressing a soft kiss to his lips, a permanent smile on her lips.

“Who else would it be, amor?” He wrapped a loose arm around her waist, pulling her back towards him and kissing her properly. (Y/N) hummed happily and wrapped her arms around his neck, bending down some to reach his height. She pulled away first, leaning her forehead against his.

“How was work?” She asked softly. He gave a roll of his eyes, pulling away completely.

“Prepping witnesses, signing forms, the usual bs from SVU. Overall a lovely day.” She softly laughed at his expression, shaking her head gently and heading back into the kitchen.

“I’m making pierogis for dinner with salad.” She called out over her shoulder .

“Is that why it looks like a bakery blew up?” He followed her into the kitchen, Tink bounding next to him chirping occasionally. She threw a glare over her shoulder, sticking out her tongue playfully.

“Oh hush up, you’re lucky I’m making dinner for once and not ordering take out for the umpteenth time this month.” Barba gave a soft laugh at that, sitting at the small island table, content to watch his love finish dinner. His joking aside, the kitchen was clean, used bowls already washed and on the drying rack, ingredients put away and plates set on the table with a bowl of salad in the center with different dressings on the side. The smell of fresh cheesy pierogis filled the air. (Y/N) flitted around the kitchen, making a drink for him, scotch on the rocks, as the timer ticked down on the oven.

“How was work for you?” Barba asked as she placed the drink in front of him. She gave a noncommittal shrug.

“Different day, same shit.” He rolled his eyes and brought the glass to his lips taking a small sip of the contents. “One of the other RN’s called out so I was stuck in the ER for a majority of the day.” She sat in front of him, dusting off her hands on the apron.

“Nothing else?” (Y/N) quirked an eyebrow at his question.

“No.” She drew out the answer. “Why do you ask.” At that, Barba gave a shrug.

“Just wondering, the detectives received a complaint about a past patient there.” She nodded slowly. “A Dylan Anderson?” At the mention of the name, (Y/N) tensed slightly.

“Oh him? He’s relatively harmless.”

“Has he ever caused an issue with you?”

“Rafa, this sounds like an interrogation rather than small talk.” She chuckled softly, getting up to make her own drink and check on the oven.

“You didn’t answer my question. Amor, has he hurt you?” Barba spoke softly yet sternly, his gaze never wavering from her. She let out a small sigh.

“When people with his diagnosis are off medication for years and then suddenly slammed with them…they can have violent tendencies.” He tensed, eyes widening slightly at the first time of hearing this. “But, that doesn’t mean they mean it. They’re scared, confused.” She came back to the table, drink in hand as she sat back down.

“So he has, hasn’t he?”

“Hurt me? Nothing I haven’t been dealt before.” His hand reached across the table, slowly enclosing it around hers and squeezing reassuringly.

“ Mi Corazón, I would appreciate it if you told me this sooner.” He went to continue but she interrupted.

“Like I said, it’s nothing that hasn’t happened before. And the psych unit has good security measures for these things.” Barba let out a sigh, realizing with (Y/N)’s stubbornness, nothing will come of this conversation.

“Can we put this aside for another day? I’d rather we talk about lighter things over dinner.” She pleaded and Barba gave in, giving a small nod.

“Alright, alright, another day then.” She smiled at his words and leaned over the table, pecking his lips quickly as the oven timer beeped loudly, startling (Y/N) at the loud noise.

“And on that note.” She grinned, getting up from the table and serving the hot pierogis.

After dinner the couple moved to the living area, (Y/N) curled up against Barbas side, a blanket laid over the two. She rested her head on his shoulder, her arm wrapped around his middle. Barba held her close, absentmindedly drawing shapes into her shoulder. Her cat, Tink, lay asleep on his lap, curled up contently. The tv screen illuminated the dim room as the couple watched the movie play out.

“I don’t understand how you can watch stuff like this.” He spoke quietly, the scene on the screen gruesome.

“You said it was my turn to pick.” She huffed out a laugh. “It’s not my fault that you can’t handle horror movies.”

“I just don’t understand how you can sleep after this.”

“28 days later isn’t even that scary.” She rolled her eyes. “But if you can’t handle it, we can change it.” She made a move to grab the remote but he stopped her.

“No, no it’s fine.” He feigned a dramatic sigh. “I can put up with it for one night.” She gave a roll of her eyes and swatted at his arm playfully.

“It’s halfway through, you can mange for another 45 minutes.” She shuffled closer against his side. “If you want, you can put whatever you want on next.” She said, her gaze fixed on the screen. He smiled faintly, kissing the top of her head gently.

“I think this will be it for tonight, got an early day tomorrow.”

“When don’t you?” She mumbled, grinning slightly. The movie continued on as the couple sat in comfortable silence, content to be in each other’s presence.

A blaring alarm woke Rafael from his sleep, his hand blindly reaching out to find his phone and turn it off. His hand on the mobile, he shut the alarm off and heaved a sigh, resting back against the pillows. He laid his arm out to the other side of the bed, hoping to land on his lover but found her side of the bed empty, cold. He became confused, seeing as that (Y/N) usually went into work later than him, obligating to sleep in when Rafael had work the next day. He sat up in the bed and pulled back the covers, rubbing his sleep ridden eyes and climbing out of bed. He quietly grabbed his bathrobe from the adjacent bathroom door and swiftly put it on and tied it, making his way out of the room and downstairs. The smell of fresh brewed coffee filled the air along with the sound of eggs crackling on the stove.

(Y/N) stood in front of the stove, waiting on the eggs to cook on one side well enough to flip. A cup of coffee in one hand, she sipped contently. The chirping of Tink made her turn her head to the side some, the sight of Rafael coming into the kitchen with the tabby cat fast on his heels, begging for food. She smiled softly, turning the heat down on the stove and got his coffee ready.

“Morning, amor.” Came his usual greeting, sleep still lacing his voice, as he walked behind (Y/N) and wrapped his arms around her middle, resting his head on her shoulder.

“Morning to you too, sleepyhead.” Smile still present, she turned her head to the side and pressed a chaste kiss to his cheek. Barba leaned his head against hers, a small hum emitting from his throat as he watched her plate the food she made.

“You don’t have work today? Usually you’re still sleeping.” He mused, pressing a few feather light kisses against her neck.

“Not until later tonight, Marianna switched shifts with me.”

“Is that the one you don’t like?” She gave a small chuckle at that.

“No, that’s Melody, the one who works in labor and delivery? Marianna is the one who works the burn unit.” He gave a noncommittal hum at that, pressing one last kiss against her neck before reluctantly pulling away to grab his coffee. (Y/N) finished plating the food and grabbed her own coffee, pouring creamer in the cup, ignoring the look of disdain on Barbas face. The couple sat across from each other at the table, eating their breakfast in comfortable silence. The only sound breaking the silence was the noise of Tink eating her wet food, the bell on her collar clanking against the metallic bowl.

After breakfast the couple got ready for their day. Barba stood in the bedroom, in front of the mirror buttoning up his three piece suit. While (Y/N) was in the en-suite bathroom, brushing out her hair.

“What are you doing before work, amor?”

“I have some errands to run and my cousin Dimitri wants to meet up for lunch.”

“Oh he’s visiting again?” His tone tight. (Y/N) let out an exasperated sigh. It was no secret that Barba held disdain for her cousin, the one who disapproved of them dating, the one who didn’t want her to move to America and the one who made snide remarks about finding someone younger to be with.

“He’s only in town for the weekend on business and then he’s back in the Ukraine. You don’t even have to see or talk to him.”

“Good, because I wouldn’t want to anyways.” He sniffed, tying the dark purple tie with light pink horizontal lines on. “Now if it was Nikolai-“ she huffed out a laugh at that, interrupting him.

“You would know before I did if he was visiting! You two get along better than bread and butter .” She poked her head out from the bathroom, a smirk playing on her lips. Barba couldn’t help but smirk as well.

“Speaking of him, do you know when he’s visiting again?” She fell silent for a moment before speaking.

“I’m not really sure, I know he’s busy with our uncle’s business and hasn’t had time to travel. Maybe later in the summer? He’ll probably visit with our uncle and aunts.” She paused, “Or we can always visit him. It’s been a few years since I’ve been home.” Barba could hear the smile in her voice, keeping that idea in the back of his mind for a potential future trip.

“I’ll think about it.” And with that, they finished up their morning routine and Barba was out the door, pressing a quick kiss to (Y/N)s lips before he left.

The bustling streets of lower Manhattan made (Y/N) thank the heavens that she decided to live an hour away from the city. The crowded sidewalks, blaring horns and rude people too much to handle on good days. Pulling into a parking garage, she parked and made her way outside, her tote bag secured around her shoulder holding reusable grocery bags. As she made her way down the street she pulled out her phone, sending a quick text to Rafael that she made it into the city. Shoving the device back in her tote, she carried on her way to the Polish deli. As she walked she thought of her plans for the day, unbeknownst to her was the person tailing behind her.

(Y/N) came upon the small building cramped between two apartment complexes and ducked into the building, saying a short greeting to the older man behind the counter. In turn, the man gave her a smile and happily welcomed her in. Ever since moving to NY, she quickly found a home away from home in the deli. The man who runs it, Piotr, an older Polish man who came to the states many moons ago and brought him home town delicacy with him. (Y/N) never thought she’d find good quality kielbasa again until she stumbled upon the quaint shop a few years ago, and ever since she goes at least twice a month. She came up to the counter, pulling out a small list from her tote bag. Piotr smiled as she stood at the counter, wiping his hands on a rag before making his way over to her.

“Is it Tuesday already? I swear I saw you just last week.” He joked, mirth crinkling the corners of his eyes. (Y/N) smiled, chuckling softly at the older gentleman’s antics.

“Wait a few more months and maybe I’ll be in here more often.”

“Oh? Is there a little one on the way?” He joked, eyes crinkling in delight.

“How I wish, but you know better than anyone that my family would have my boyfriend’s head if we had a child before marriage.” Light laughter filled the small deli shop from the two, the conversation quickly devolving into the cultural differences they’ve seen since moving.

The bell at the front door rung, signaling that another person entered and the two went from pleasant chatter back to business. As Piotr packed up the meats, (Y/N) took a look at the varying jarred pickles and relish’s, picking up a bar of pickled peppers, thinking of different side dishes she could include them in. Lost in thought, she didn’t notice the presence behind her until a hand dropped on her shoulder.

“Oh hey! So funny seeing you here.” The voice exclaimed, jolting her out of her thoughts. She gripped the jar tighter as to not drop it, turning to the side some to face the person. A smile was gracing her lips, but as she saw the face of the person, it slowly dropped.

“Mr. Anderson? I didn’t expect to see you out here.” She took a s all step back, allowing his hand to slide off her shoulder. His eyes watched her movements, himself taking a short step forward.

“Well I like to come here sometimes, their sausage is really good.” From behind her, she could hear Piotr grumble about ‘Americans’ and ‘their unculturedness’.

“You like kielbasa?” She stated, her voice giving away that she doesn’t believe him. He noticed.

“Of course I do! What, you think I would lie about something like that?” His tone made her take another step back.

“I didn’t mean it like that, I just know that not everyone prefers to cook it themselves.” She offered a small smile, and like the polish angel he is Piotr spoke up.

“Here you go, all set for you.” He spoke in Polish, something he only does when he senses trouble. “Is this man bothering you?” He came around the counter, holding the meats and helping her put them into a reusable bag.

“No, he’s fine. He’s a patient from the hospital.” She replied, keeping an eye on the man as he stared at them, at her.

“Need me to call someone? That boyfriend of yours?” He clasped his hands around her free one, smiling softly.

“No, really it’s fine. He’s harmless.” She gave him a reassuring smile. “Thank you though, I appreciate it.” She pulled away, patting his arm affectionately before leaving the deli.

(Y/N) walked down the streets, her list of ‘to-do’s’ quickly abandoned as she stepped into a boutique, two blocks away from the deli. She grabbed her phone from the tote, quickly dialing in Rafael’s number. She pressed the phone against her ear as she stepped towards the back of the store, away from the windows. The relief that rushed through her as his voice came through the small speaker.

“Mi amor, what’s wrong?” He spoke, worry filling his words.

“I’m okay, I promise. I just..I had the weirdest interaction with an old patient of mine.” She spoke, her words carrying a subtle shake to them.

“Dylan?” He spoke after a moment of thought, she nodded before replying.

“Yes, him.” She recounted to Rafael what occurred at the deli.

“I can pick you up, stay where you are.” She could hear the shuffling of papers.

“Rafa, please, I can’t see you miss work because of me.” She could see the eye roll from him.

“Don’t be ridiculous, this is important. Work can wait for me.”

“I’ll call Dimitri, and once I’m with him I’ll call you, okay? You can’t miss work.” She pleaded, hoping to convince him. She heard him sigh through the phone. When it came to their stubbornness, she would always win.

“Fine, the second he gets there, you call me.”

“Yes, of course.” She nodded into the phone.

“Te amo, mi amor.” He spoke softly.

“Ya lyublyu tebya, dorogoy”* she replied, affectionately, before hanging up and quickly dialing her cousin, Dimitri.

Back at the precinct, the two detectives were compiling their notes about Dylan Anderson and (Y/N) Koval.

“So far, the only thing that links these two together is the hospital. Before that, they never once crossed paths.” Rollins spoke, leaning back in her chair as she glanced over at Carisi.

“Do you think the obsession with her started because she was probably the only decent person to him?” Carisi spoke in turn, fidgeting with his pen.

“It could be, I can’t see another reason for it.” She continued, “Unless, he knows about Kovals relationship and is jealous.”

“Which brings us back to square one, who is this mystery man?”

“I think we should pay another visit to Ms. Koval, press a little further.” Carisi nodded in agreement, gathering up his notes. Benson walked out her office, files in hand.

“Hey guys, how goes the investigation?” She asked, smiling slightly at the two detectives.

“As good as it can get, we’re gonna have another talk with Ms. Koval to see if we can get any more information.” Rollins stated and Benson nodded.

“Good, keep me posted if anything else occurs.”

“Will do, boss.” Carisi added, chuckling some as he left the bullpen with Rollins in tow.

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in chapter translation:

*i love you, darling (russian)

A/N: Hello everyone! Terribly sorry for the very long overdue post. This gal has been going through it. My life update feels like a wattpad one; my mom died and I have no will anymore to live, yayay. Anyways! I am going to try and update more, but it will take me longer. My love for Rafael Barba is not going anywhere, although Spencer Reid is certainly a runner up for that spot now.