Neither Rain Nor Snow Nor Glom of Nit

#fandom needs this one

Discworld Heritage Post

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to deny location sharing and turn off personalized ads and reject all non-essential cookies and not set up siri and face ID

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

i think when u clean your house it should stay clean forever. what do u mean i have to do it again

#do cedar waxwings ever eat anything besides photogenic red berries#do cedar waxwings ever do anything besides eating photogenic red berries#is there any way this child can get its parent to stop feeding it photogenic red berries

watch how many berries I can cram into this other bird

I think the "pre" and "post" parts in "preposterous" should cancel each other out but everyone else seems to find my idea completely erous

get in loser we’re gonna try again despite it all

it's weird how whenever a neighbor's smoke alarm goes off it's because they're a talentless hack who can't cook, but when mine goes off it's because my culinary craft is being hamstrung by a draconian smoke detector that is far too sensitive for its own good

oh this was about someone specific

sorry for being annoying [remembers that practicing gratitude instead of shame is better for my mental health and my relationships] thank you for letting me be annoying with you