imperatrix umbrosa

i have to do everything around here

Tony had fought with himself for a month about going to Kathmandu. Stephen had told him he needed time, and Tony had tried to give it to him. But three months in and Tony was worried. He’d hated the thought of being that overbearing boyfriend, but he just… just wanted to make sure Stephen was okay.

It turned out Tony wasn’t the overbearing boyfriend.

He was the creepy, stalker ex. At least if the sight of Stephen laughing, light and at ease with his friend meant anything. And at first Tony had thought it was just a friend, but then the man had hooked his arm with Stephen’s to pull him out of the way of a group of men and it had just… lingered. Stephen who didn’t like it when people touched him too casually.

He knew Stephen wouldn’t cheat. Would never cheat, but that meant…

I need time, Stephen had said when he’d left Tony back in new York. I need to figure myself out.

Tony had always assumed that when Stephen broke up with him, that it would be blunt and to the point, that there would be no missing it. But apparently Tony had missed it. Because here Stephen was with someone else, looking happy in a way he hadn’t since his accident. Tony certainly hadn’t been able to make him happy, anymore.

Tony swallowed back the grief. Well, at least this meant that, as far as Stephen was concerned, Tony had had an emotionally mature response to the break up. Because Tony hadn’t realized it was a break up.

But the evidence was clear.

Stephen’s gaze flickered his direction, perhaps feeling the weight of Tony’s gaze and Tony turned immediately away, hoping Stephen failed to see him amidst the bustle of the street.

He didn’t look back, hunching his shoulders and moving back the way he came.

Catalina Cheng, “YOU ARE GAY AND CHINESE”

(They don’t quite get to the driving part. Blame Stephen.)

Tony stood on the driver’s side of the car, looking across the roof at Stephen. He was in full Sorcerer's regalia, for all that there was nothing magical on the agenda for the evening.

Just an afternoon drive.

They’d planned it together. They’d start from one of Tony's more remote properties. They’d go in the middle of the day. The route was a quiet country road, no embankments or rivers anywhere on it. Tony would be driving. It was supposed to be an easy first step.

Right now, Tony was wondering what the hell either of them had been on, thinking that the first step could ever be easy.

But he didn’t say anything. As much as he wanted to comfort Stephen, to remind him that he didn’t have to do this, that there was no reason he ever needed to get into another car for the rest of his life, Tony knew how fear could feel like an albatross dragging you down. Stephen had decided to do this. Tony’s job was to be here.

Finally Stephen let out a shaky breath. “Could you get in first?”

“Sure,” Tony said, keeping his voice carefully casual. He slid into the driver’s seat, leaving the door open. When Tony was settled, Stephen carefully fitted himself into the passenger seat, his eyes fixed on Tony the whole time.

Tony swallowed a surge of emotion at that trust, then had to swallow again when Stephen reached out to take Tony’s hand. He was trembling worse than Tony had ever felt before. Tony carefully laced their fingers together.

Tony: *observes him carefully*

Tony: How is that possible that your bitch face is bitch talking?

Director tony stark 

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