I ♡ prettymen

Right….

You two were fighting with a fire based enemy in a volcanic island, with a big fat bet on who can fight em using the least amount of cosmos, or non at all.

"If it weren't for Hyoga freezing everything over, you two would've been in an urn" Shun sighs, wiping off the ashes off his cloth.

"AN urn?" Seiya repeats, tilting his head in thought before looking at you. "How romantic!" You say whilst Shiryu put some ice on your wounds.

"It's really not" Hyoga shakes his head, panting from using so much cosmos to freeze an entire island.

__________________________________________

Another time, you two forgot your cloths. Wow.

Did you two back away though?

Nah, you'd two win.

Ikki arrived to hand you two your cloths only to realize the enemy was already beaten up and bloodied, but so were the two of you.

"Absolute idiots" Ikki groans as he realizes he'd have two carry TWO absolute idiots back to the mansion.

….

"What happened" Hyoga looked at you two up and down, judging you two not so silently as his face spoke a thousand words.

You and Seiya were a mess, walking wobbly, faces looking worse than a well used punching bag.

"These two fought a specter without using their cloths" Ikki sighs, dropping your cloths onto the floor with a loud thud.

"Hehhehehehe you remember the expression on that guy's face?" Seiya looks at you, half his braincells probably smoked.

"Yeah, it was so dumb" You giggle before falling face first onto the floor, Seiya falling on your back not long after.

"Heavy" You didn't move though, stars swirling around your head. "Nuh uh" Seiya was already knocked out.

__________________________________________

"Seiya"

Seiya turns to look at you, before looking down at the far drop down the cliff. "Hell yeah"

Seiya was mid sprint and you were mid dive when Hyoga froze you two, Seiya up to his knees and you up to your neck.

"Hey! You're cheating!" Seiya notices your diving pose. "I didn't say we had to run!" You rolled your eyes.

Hyoga took a moment to realize what happened, his body just moved on muscle memory.

Shiryu was already picking up and moving your frozen bodies somewhere safer.

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" The screams of you and Seiya were heard.

Shun turned around to see the source of the noise, only to be set rolling down the hill as you and Seiya's bodies collided with his.

"WHAT THE-?!" Shun couldn't pull out his chain as you and Seiya's body blocked him from doing so.

And so the screams of you, Seiya and Shun were heard by anyone within a 10 mile radius of the mountain.

….

"Shiryu" Hyoga heard the noise, but didn't know it was the three of you.

"Yes?"

"You hear that?"

Shiryu looked up "I think it's a boulder" this caused Hyoga to get a closer look.

"No it isn't, its-"

WHAM

You three crashed into Hyoga, possibly breaking all his bones.

"It is a boulder, just worse"

"Shut"

__________________________________________

Now everyone was chilling, no missions no threat, just snacks and TV.

"I'm bored" You sigh.

"Me too" Seiya replies with a mouth full of Lays chips.

Blink.

The other three were in their cloths.

RING

He didn't expect the blinding artificial lights and the smell of air fresheners.

Meanwhile, there was you, working overtime because your boss promised extra pay that he'll probably cut and count as 'tax'.

Then this black-haired boy cringed and go in and out of the store several times.

RING

RING

RING

You didn't notice at first until the 4th time he went out and then back in.

RING

You were probably supposed to help in, but you were running on caffeine/sugar and neither of those gave you enough feelings to give a damm.

Hades, notices you, looks at you dead in the eyes before approaching you.

Oh great.

"Can I help you, sir?"

The boy's face was inches from yours. You weren't gonna lie, he was cute, so atleast it wasn't THAT bad.

"Hey" Hades manges to say. Turns out he wasn't as charming as he is in the underworld. Maybe because he was their god?

"Hello, can I help you?" You repeat, the guy was starting to piss you off. He acted like a drunkie, but looked wayyy too innocent to be the drinking.

"Yeah, what's your goddess' weakness?" Hades decides to say it bluntly, humans are simple minded creatures, surely you'd just..give it.

In your perspective, this proves that he's not drunk, just a preacher, one on drugs, possibly.

Great.

"You want a chocolate bar, sir? There's a 30% discount" You offer, but the boy still stared at you.

Hades turned around, and started walking around the store, contemplating his next move.

Stubborn mortal, perhaps I should try more convincing techniques.

He decided to try another day, and exited the store.

Before nearly getting ran over because he walked into the road without looking left or right.

__________________________________________

It took awhile for Shun to be caught off guard enough where Hades could sneak up again. It has been 3 days that Hades just sat there, thinking about you.

You were probably holding alot of information, maybe he needed more force.

Not only that, but you were probably the most pleasant looking mortal he's ever seen, so he might keep you as a cute little….

Ah, these human feelings.

So after gaining control of Shun's body again, he walked right back into the store.

RING

You were on your 4th overtime shift, eyes soulless and dark (not literally, lol).

Then you saw him again.

'For the love of…..'

This time the boy walked right up to the counter and slammed his hands down. "Tell me your goddess' weakness!" He says.

Hades was using his dark cosmos to intimidate you, something that even his highest soldiers would fold at.

"This is a 9/13 sir, we have discounted chocolate that's 3 weeks past expiration date" You shoved the chocolate into his pocket.

You can lose a couple bucks if it meant you'd be free of a preacher for a good couple weeks.

"You insolent mortal" Hades hissed, but he did take interest in the chocolate, opening it and taking a bite.

__________________________________________

"Are you okay Shun?" Seiya asks, looking concerned.

Shun was kneeling over the toilet, throwing up everything he ate. "Obviously not you idiot" Ikki bonked Seiya right on the head.

"Ow!"

"Thats what you get"

__________________________________________

RING

You had just clocked in, right back from college and the first thing you saw was 'Shun', staring at you blankly infront of the counter.

"You tried to poison me" He says, an offended look on his face. Hades felt what Shun did when he was throwing his guts up, and it was a pain he hadn't felt before.

"That's what expired chocolate does to you buddy" You say, nodding. Explaining how food poisoning worked first thing on the job was not something you expected.

"You have peaked my interest, mortal" Hades says assuming you can feel his cosmos but still stood unphased.

"Really? Wow" You just nodded along.

"Now-" before he even got to say it, you interrupted him. "It's chilly powder" you said the first thing that came to your mind.

Hades however was very skeptic. "Really?" How could a human made object be the weakness of a goddess?

"Really, here look" You blew some into his eyes. You were really needing some entertainment.

Hades did NOT expect the assault, his eyes burned and he felt his rage boil over as he climbed over the counter and gripped the front of your shirt.

"I'll kill you, you insolent mortal!" He screams.

Oops, maybe you went too far.

"Hey, I just told you the weakness of 'my goddess" Even your sarcasm wasn't lost on the god of the dead's ears, he really was about to punch you to the underworld and whatever is after that.

But the cons of being in a human body whilst their consciousness still remained was emotion.

And Hades felt somethiny tingle in Shun's stomach when you looked at him.

Even when your eyes were some of the most depressing things he'd ever seen in his short moment of seeing Japan.

He hesitated, like really hesitated.

Over a mortal….

"I'll keep you"

"I beg your finest pardon?"

He let you go, but with a smile, something that made you uneasy, before walking out of the convenience store like he got something.

You never saw him again after that.

__________________________________________

Bonus part (This is not following the canon storyline I just had a silly 'what if'):

Even with the chaos outside you couldn't escape work, people were screaming, the sky was turning dark and yet here you were.

Life sucks.

Then you felt something grab you by the waist, you looked down and noticed armored fingers wrapped around your waist.

"Found you, mortal" Hades says, standing right behind you.

"What the-?!" You turn around to see this beautiful man (in canon he is beautiful tho) with a smile on his face ss he looks down on you.

Hades chuckles, leaning down "You'd be a wonderful thing to my collection" what can he say? He likes eye-catching things and you certainly are that.

Atleast you don't have to work overtime ever again <3

He's joking, he just wants to make a silly little joke of your cat, who was actually very happy when realizing that you and Elias knew eachother.

The man who plays with him knows his parent???? Hell yeah!

Elias noticed how your cat seems to like him, alot, even after he was not the mop wielder anymore.

But now he gives small snacks to your son, after asking for permission from you ofcourse.

But you didn't expect Elias to treat your son with so much love. You're almost jealous…almost…

"Eliasss, he's gonna get chonky!"

"Apologies, dear I just can't resist that handsome face"

Your cat purrs in content when Elias pats him, back arching into the man's touch.

"Are you trying to steal my son?"

You were only trying to tease him, a little revenge for all the times he teased you, but Elias saw that as a challenge.

"They did say to get to a single parent, you need to get close to their kid first"

"…. Who said that?!"

"Common sense"

This left you wondering if he was being serious or not, especially with his tendencies to tease.

Guess you'll never know 🤷‍♀️

Atleast your son loves him…speaking of where is he?

"Mreoww"

"Huh?"

Oh he's following Elias back to Dionysia…wait WHAT!???

Jo Kongoza

Saw your cat walking around campus, noticing how it isn't like any other cat, he thought it was lost.

"Where's your owner little one?" Jo asked the fluffball.

"Jo!" Your voice rang through the halls as you ran towards him.

Your son wasn't in a rush to run back to you, infact, he looked content being scratched by Jo and stared to rub himself on the ghoul's shoe.

"He's a friendly fella, huh?"

"He is he is…" You pick your son up, the cat doing little to complain.

You know who the fluffball really likes though?

Female Jo

You two were eating together during lunch, and your cat sat in the middle of you two, purring contently.

"How are you so good with everybody?" You ask her, more focused on the question than your own lunch.

Jo could only chuckle, how could she explain it? She just had a natural charm. "It's a secret, cutie" she winks.

"Aww"

Shion Genkai

Noticed the little furball hanging around you and got curious.

"Why is that thing following you?"

"That 'thing' is my son, Shion"

Neuron activation moment for Shion there.

The moment you realize what you just did, you couldn't really do anything. One, your cat really is your son, and two, Shion is not gonna listen to your excuses the moment you mention family.

"Oh? I didn't realize we have a son already"

"Who said anything about we???"

Okay maybe don't say that last part, don't want your hair cut shorter hm?

Shion tries to get closer to the fluffy creature, offering snacks and stuff, but even your son knows better than to accept snacks from the man that literally thinks crying means happiness.

Oh trust me, he actually saw Shion making you cry and how happy the man was.

And with a little bravery, your son defended you! By jumping on Shion's face ofcourse.

Shion instinctively used his stigma to switch your cat with a bird on a tree branch, putting your poor son in a very high place.

This ofcourse caused you to stop your tears and focus on your son's predicament. "Shion! He can't get down!" You say as you wiped your tears away.

"Get him down then" Shion's words made your sadness stop completely, "I would if I can in the first place!" Poor boi was meowing in distress, not sure how to jump down.

You had to think really really hard on how to get him down….not really though, you just gotta be brave.

"If you get him down I'll give you a kiss"

Don't be surprised when you find your son up there more often.

My best advice is to offer him daily smooch, don't miss a day though!

Mio Susuhara

He was fixing something up when he saw the cat in his toolbox, playing with a random screw.

"Hm? Where did you come from?" Mio picked him up, looking at the unfamiliar face.

"Mreow" The cat was trying to swallow a screw.

"Hey, don't do that…!"

You walked in seeing Mio and your cat in a tug of war, of a small screw.

Your cat found it as a fun activity whilst Mio was genuinely concerned about the cat having a dirty screw in his mouth.

Concern also crashed into you when you realized what they were tugging on.

Thankfully, you managed to get the screw out. Unfortunately, your cat thinks your a villain for it.

Back turned on you, tail thumping…the full package.

"My bad for not putting my toolbox in a better place, inspector" Mio says scratching his head with an apologetic smile.

"Eh? It's not your fault Mio! He just likes to eat odd things…" You sigh, looking at the still sulky cat.

Eventually, you had to stop your conversation with Mio and pick up the cat, who thankfully did not complain.

Oddly enough, your cat would visit Mio every now and then, perhaps because of his personality or maybe because he reminded your cat of you.

Like come on.

If your son isn't by your side, nor in Vagastrom asking for food, then he's probably where Mio is.

"Have you seen my cat?" You ask for the nth time that day, sweaty, tired, and in a HORRIBLE mood.

"Sorry Inspector-chan, but I just got out of Obscuary"

Damm, perfect person to ask that to huh?

You and your fried mind finally connected the dots. "Oh….how about Mio?"

Rui, who was cruelly reminded by the world of his lack of freedom in wandering, and now was slapped in the face by you asking for another man's wherabouts without asking about him…managed to squeak out. "I think I saw him heading to Sinostra"

"Thanks Rui!" You ran, like really full on sprinted to Sinostra, hoping Mio was still there.

"It should work smoother now" Mio wiped the sweat off his forehead, another job well done.

"Mreow!" Your cat proudly meows, holding the toolbox.

"Finally! I landed my foot wrong while I was chasing after tha-"

WHAM

"Mio!" You slammed open the door, before your eyes locked onto the fluffy cat. "You"

You didn't even get to finish before you were bonked on the head. "Knock before you open the door, BB!" "Ouch!"

Mio sweatdrops at the interaction. "Sorry for scaring you inspector, your cat followed me here and started helping me so I assumed you already knew"