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You get one opportunity in this life to play mermaids in the lake at Shane Hollanders cottage and Im not going to fucking blow it.

Slurpin on itttttt 😜😜🍆🍆

Caffeine pills and a noon margarita yuuup #brunch

entire locker room on suicide watch cuz Jane won’t text back. They should be on homicide watch as well but maybe they have fantasy of me killing them all. I know marly has had dreams like that.

Just because I prayed every night for my father to finally die doesn’t mean I can not miss him 🙄

Told Hollander I wanted to bottom for aprils fools and he started crying

(Looking at nine inches on a ruler) I love lying .

Choke on it spit on it ride on it. Didn’t say his name, but you thought of him anyway ❤️