I initially wrote this Remus and Sirius for my sci-fi fest fic, Professor R. J. Lupin and the Time Machine, which is a tragic and wild tale, and does not have a happily-ever-after ending. But I fell so in love with them that I had to give them a proper story filled with fluff and smut (and a happily ever after!), and that became Freedom, Books, Flowers, and the Moon.
Remus stopped and turned to Sirius, who looked back at him expectantly with those warm, grey eyes. Remus's heart pounded out of his chest. There was no going back now.
āI can't take your money anymore,ā he said.
Siriusās face fell. āWhat?ā
āIt's been eighteen months since we started. Eighteen months of testing, and searching, and scouring the pages of medical journals. Countless hours in the lab, and Iām no closer to a cure than I was eighteen months ago.ā
Remus was stalling. But he couldn't just come out and sayĀ I've fallen madly in love with youĀ to his business partner. His best friend. AnotherĀ man.Ā If Sirius didn't feel the same way, their friendship would be ruined, or worse ā he could have RemusĀ arrested.Ā Remus didn't really think Sirius would do that, but that didnāt make him any less terrified.
āThese things take time,ā Sirius said gently. āI know that.ā
āAnd youāve been so patient,ā said Remus. āTooĀ patient. Too accommodating.ā
āIāllĀ keepĀ being patient and accommodating until you find a cure,ā Sirius insisted. āAnd after that, Iāll fund your next project. Researchingā¦ why pigs canāt fly,ā he laughed, āor whatever suits your fancy.ā
āNo, Sirius, I canāt let you do that.ā Remus sighed. āBut itās alright! Iām ready to give it up. It's time.ā
āBut, why?ā
āI just thinkā¦ā Remus took a deep breath. āIt feels like anĀ ethicalĀ problem, if I keep taking money from you.ā
Remus let himself hope forĀ justĀ a moment that that would be enough of a clue for Sirius to catch his meaning. But, of course, it wasnāt, and Sirius just furrowed his brow in confusion. Remus had to stop stalling. He had to take the risk.
āBecause Iāve come to think of you as more than a patron.ā
Sirius could have pointed out the obviousness of that fact. They became friends so quickly after they met, their relationship was neverĀ strictlyĀ professional. SiriusĀ couldĀ have said,Ā Of course, old chum!Ā and patted Remus on the shoulder.
But he didnāt. He gave Remus a small smile, the twinkle returning to his eye. He stepped a little closer. Close enough that Remus could smell the vanilla-scented oil in his beard.
It was quiet. Remus could hear his own heartbeat.
He took off his hat, focused on the reflection of the bandstand lights in Sirius's eyes, took in a breath of vanilla, and said, āMuchĀ more.ā
He felt like he'd stepped off a cliff. The only things keeping him from plummeting to his death were Sirius's growing smile and the ringed fingers that were slowly intertwining with his own.
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