classic textposts

So I don’t play the sims super often so I didn’t know that evil sims can do an “evil workout” which seems to just be a normal workout except sometimes they pause to laugh maniacally.

I think ‘I adore you’ is such a wonderful phrase,, it’s so soft and loving and feels so safe and comforting

You’d think that once you finally get long term access to a cat and your yearning to have cat access is fulfilled that you’d become slightly less obsessed with seeing people’s cats but no if anything it gets worse

Your 20s are not about getting your life together they're about learning to escape the self imposed torture labyrinth you've built inside your own head

i love discovering new music. but there's actually nothing like rediscovering old music. like, hello me from 5, 10, 15 years ago. so good to see you. same heart, i see. god, i love you.

I don't need AI to write. I can create fake scenarios in my head perfectly fine myself.

We need to isolate and start selectively breeding the plastic eating bacteria so we can optimise their efficiency, and then somehow splice their DNA into the gut bacteria of an obligate carnivore, so we can put it in our cats gut biomes so they'll finally be free of having to choose between whether they want to eat plastic or whether they want to live.

personally I'm annoyed by the socioeconomic conditions that made words like "unalive" necessary but simultaneously impressed by the linguistic adaptations young people have made to continue talking about important things while subject to those conditions and I think if you can't hold both of those thoughts in your head you might just be old man yelling at cloud

i block ppl all the time so my blocklist ranges from "actual fucking asshole fascist" n "post that mildly annoyed me because im petty" and if i went thru my blocklist rn i probably would have no idea why i blocked each of them but whatever

Hey kids, you need to start worrying a little less about getting “#mogged” and a little more about getting “#smogged”. This is an Air Quality Index public service announcement.

i love reblogging things i've already reblogged like. y'all are going to see this again

little girl in the checkout line was freaking the FUCK out reaching for a shelf and screaming "GIMMEEEE GIMMEEEEE" at the top of her lungs and the mom kept saying "no 🫩" and I look at the shelf expecting there to be candy or something and it was full of batteries

hey, sex pervert question: do you ever think about me even when im not present

sometimes on the tumblr app you click on an image to see it fullscreen and it will give you a completely different image it has sourced from the fucking aether. i hope they never fix this because i got flashbanged with an image of scooby doo calling me a ‘raggot’