If only I could be so grossly incandescent

Logically i know that the fake blue gem jewelry on facebook marketplace is NOT the Hope Diamond because the Hope Diamond is locked away in a museum where it can’t hurt me so if I were to theoretically buy the lovely dark and deep sapphire blue jewelry on there it would not result in me having a violent and untimely death but also what if it actually was the Hope Diamond and i not only am unknowingly stealing a piece of history but in three weeks time they’re going to find my bones in 14 different states and one US territory

I worry about the Hope Diamond finding its way into my life the same way a grade schooler worries about getting trapped in quicksand.

Lets dissect uncle to find his wish gland

Where do you think the comma goes

Breaking news

He’s so shy he died

Reblog and put in the tags if you can remember where you got the shirt you're currently wearing.

God works at lady foot locker

they used to do nothing to me back in the morally neutral lab. it sucked

you were the control

fuuuuck what were they doing to the other folks #fomo

(backseating you at the mortar and pestle) man you aint even squarshing it