Radiant System

Trans men have shared histories with lesbians who have shared histories with bisexual women who have shared histories with ace people who have shared histories with aro people have shared histories with gay men who have shared histories with trans women who have shared histories with nonbinary people who have shared histories with etc etc etc etc etc.

I will also talk about analysis of Ruby’s dialogue during her breakdown in vol9 as well as what her words connect to/is a throwback on

Also I will have to use the justice league movie (part 2) as reference for the after part because volume 10 isn’t out yet but considering it takes place after the events of volume9, I think its fair enough.

For short, this comes from a place of “Ruby Rose is obviously mentally ill and I think she’s experiencing the mania part right now.” While I will not be trying to diagnose her with anything since everything is technically up to interpretation, I would say some of her characteristics/behaviour in this volume (+) do have a common theme.

Her unusually elevated (After vol9 in vacuo) and irritable mood (was constantly on the edge and upset at others after a certain point, even had a mental breakdown out on them, was frustrated with everyone and everything, including herself), randomly increased energy (after vol9 in vacuo, though this has been a thing of hers for a while) reduced need for sleep/feeling restlessness (straight up does not sleep/irregular sleep schedule/does not rest when others are on multiple occasions) racing thoughts (in middle of combat where she freezes and is breathing heavy, suddenly thinking about everything) impulsivity, emotional intensity, abrupt shifts in behaviour, detachment, emotional numbness (she talks about this while she’s in the tree, followed by bursts of action) increased goal directed activity in multiple situations (clear focus on missions and certain goals, impulsivity also showing a lot) taking on more responsibility as well as confidence expanding.

Most of these things overlap with other stuff, but the common ground is that these symptoms also come from trauma response and depression under extreme stress, that is the one thing that is 100% canon. Ruby is in a state where she has completely been pushed to the edge and is acting differently. A few differences here and there such as.. usually, in a very simple form, increased goal directed activity often comes from “I can do everything” rather than Ruby’s “I have to do this” “I have to carry all this” “I have to keep going” but the latter still does fit in this category, just fuelled by internal pressure, inflated responsibility/importance, severe stress and grief, a lot of emotional suppression, and identity collapse.

I would like to expand on the “irritable mood” part here. First, “at herself” part, because during volume 8? While yang is trying to comfort ruby after their plan failed ruby is straight up berating herself for being ‘childish’ even though it was many others believing the same hope she was holding onto. This continues to happen even as she makes decisions that do help people.

Ruby was obviously fed up with everyone else as well, she was constantly on the edge and had some poison in her words even when she didn’t exactly mean to, just like how a rose has its thorns. Other than her words, her expressions and body language show that she is irritated at the very least, upset.

One thing to mention about this scene is how as soon as Ruby realised that Jaune will be of no help (considering he’s not all there.. and has made no actual progress on finding a way out) and that she’s the only one everyone can rely on again, Ruby zones out while looking clearly upset.

By this point, Ruby is— has been starting to get really mad at everyone for expecting everything from her, how it’s always her who has to find a way through. She is so irritated and angry that she even mocks Yang and Blake for getting together in this situation. Which is something Ruby would NEVER do if not for this. Considering she knows very well that Yang sacrificed her own childhood to make sure Ruby had hers. But in the end, Ruby sacrificed her childhood and life for the sake of everyone. For Ruby to mock and yell at her own sister for accepting her feelings and choosing to be happy is incredibly uncharacteristic which is exactly why no one from team RWBY in this scene can actually talk back to her, they have no idea where all this anger is coming from because its completely different from “who Ruby is.” The unnoticed and uncharacteristic resentment towards everyone she’s been holding yet suppressing so far started to leak out on every side so much that it doesn’t even hold up with her own values and beliefs anymore.

The dialogue in this scene is also very interesting. I would like to note that everything that’s being said here has some— if not all, truth. It’s being said with a lot of distain and poison yet it’s still factually correct. I might be reaching a bit on some of these takes but still..

It starts with Weiss saying “Right, Ruby?” After WBY comforts Jaune about the loss of the paper afterians. Which Ruby responds with, “Why are you asking me?” I think this part comes from how most of the decisions made in vol9 was between others, while Ruby was out of the discussion entirely. Whether it was because no one asked her or because she herself wouldn’t speak, it’s still true.

“Because I’m the leader? Because I’m just.. supposed to have something to say?” How everyone has always expected Ruby to make a statement, to lift up their spirits and be the beacon of hope everyone needs. Just like what the past Ruby illusion said, “Your sister needs you, your friends need you, the whole world needs you to keep fighting forever and ever!”

But just like when Weiss tried to help Ruby open up to her and share some of the pain and burden, Ruby again is not ready to talk let alone know what to say. She can’t define her own thoughts and feelings to begin with. (Guide my way lyrics) “Because I don’t.”

“What about me? No time, right?” Everytime Ruby was close to speaking up about something, she was interrupted. Of course it was never out of ill intent, yet it still happened. Back to chapter 4, when curious cat mentioned salem, Ruby was taken aback, which then Yang called out to her, “Uh.. hey, Rubes?” noticing she’s acting off. Then after Ruby struggles to find the words, Blake says, “Maybe we shouldn’t worry about home right now. We’ve got enough problems to—” getting cut off from the fact they lost the cat again.

Everyone, including her team has been pretty much oblivious to Ruby’s suffering, but it was not because they were not paying attention to her. It was because they’ve been with Ruby since forever now, trusting her to be fine and come to them, especially yang, if she were to feel down, and simply didn’t exactly pick up on the subtle and not-so-subtle changes from her. The one or two times they did notice the obvious, it was interrupted by something or completely ignored by Ruby. (yang asking if ruby is okay after she wakes up, Ruby continues to talk about neo without answering, weiss talking about penny and how hard it must’ve been for ruby, ruby walking away unable to look at her in the eyes.)

“Gotta get home, gotta help Jaune— gotta find someone who isn’t just going to screw everything up!” The last part comes from how Ruby blames herself for everything, including the fall of atlas. While Weiss was talking about how she’s tired of leaving places in ashes, and how they need to find someone they can trust to help them get out of here before something horrible happens, even though it was not at all directed to ruby, she still took the blame for it.

“Maybe even finally get our feelings sorted out! Good for you by the way, we’re all SO happy for you!” Throwback to the previous episode where they were thrown into a place made to face your emotional/mental issues and solve it or wait for the storm to pass to get out. Where Ruby notices that Yang and Blake are missing, to which Jaune replies with “Must’ve had something bigger to work out.” Ruby is not entirely upset at Yang or Blake for being troubled by their feelings for each other, neither is she upset that they made up and out..lol it was just a part deep inside her hurt by how while everyone has “bigger problems” to deal with, such as their feelings for one another, Ruby was frozen in the worst moment, cascading down below in her own thoughts and feelings. But now holds some resentment towards things like these, which she usually never would.

“I’m sorry, is this a bad time? Are we supposed to be mourning Jaune’s make-believe friends?!” This is probably the meanest, harshest line she says in this dialogue, she says it knowing Jaune has been stuck here for so long and is emotionally relying on protecting these paper creatures he named after everyone in his life. But still, shes not wrong at all. Ruby clearly holds some resentment because of the fact that she couldn’t grieve her friend, Penny’s death let alone progress it. And this next part is.. just. bear with me cause I might sound a little insane.🥹

In chapter 2, Ruby finds Penny’s sword through the auction and brings it with her as they run off, while the others are arguing..? Talking, they notice Ruby just looking at the sword in her hands as she sits next to Blake with a pained expression. “I couldn’t explain why, but I.. I was drawn to it.” As soon as she finishes her sentence, a sudden storm appears above them, making it rain. “Great. Now its raining on just us. That’s it. We’re getting out of this nightmare!”

When I first heard her say this I physically winced because it’s just so unintentionally cruel. It’s obvious why its raining on just them, there is someone grieving and almost letting out her bottled up pain and sadness out, the rain begins as soon as Ruby realises her own pain, and ends as soon as Ruby picks herself up again, suppressing her emotions to ask Blake what Alyx did next, to keep moving. Now that we know the cause for the rain, it makes Weiss’ words even more painful, of course she wasn’t talking about Ruby, she would never say something like this about her to begin with. Weiss herself is facing a lot of trauma from the destruction of her home, she is also fed up and just wants to leave. But of course, everything being done at once, at the worst timings ever, cause things like these.

In the end, none of them were oblivious to Ruby’s issues on purpose, none of them actually knew how bad it was, but the cost of their trust, assumptions and negligence was too much.

Now for the different sides of the spectrum I initially wanted to talk about..

During volume 9, Ruby had given up on herself, falling deeper into the void with every step she takes. She was obviously miserable, while talking, walking, even when everyone else was resting she was wide awake just looking at crescent rose. As others talk to their past selves, fighting back and showing that they’ve found their own resolve and path, Ruby is on the floor completely defeated. She is lost and doesn’t know what to do.

In combat, before, she didnt have crescent rose so she couldn’t do anything other than just watch but even after Jaune gave her crescent rose back, she froze while everyone else was fighting. It was apparent that Ruby is so tired mentally and traumatised from everything that she physically cannot move her body like she should when her life is in danger, let alone others. (I would like to mention that scenes song as well, “trapdoor”, personally one of my favourites, it does a really good job at showing Ruby’s thoughts and feelings during that moment/vol9)

Even though Ruby absolutely adores crescent rose and sees it as her precious baby, when jaune gave it to her she was far from happy, stressed even. During all this, Ruby was completely out of it, disassociating and not replying to others properly, let alone have a proper conversation outside of small and eventually big arguments.

That is until the very end where she chose herself, for technically multiple reasons but most important one being because of her mother’s last words. After she comes back, Ruby is like “how she used to be” or at least, something like that. Though you can still see her tired expression.

That is one side of the spectrum.. miserable, lost, depressed, angry, disconnected from everything and suicidal. Ruby is in a very low place, a new low for her which took two years worth of trauma and pain which she bottled up to finally come crashing all at once on her. Which caused her to completely break to the point of death on purpose.

Now, for the after part of volume 9.. we see Ruby doing the exact opposite at the start. She is overconfident and reckless, throwing herself into danger without any second thought, trying to take down a king taijitu all by herself— which she is completely capable of, even more at that! but it was still really reckless, not because she can’t do it but because the way she goes on about it. She even almost fell if it wasn’t for Weiss slowing her down to catch her, which Ruby used the momentum of to go back in even more. The aftermath of that battle was Yang glaring at her and everyone else is just, not sure what to do. Blake looks so worried lol

Right after, Ruby walks in saying she feels amazing, and immediately comes up with a new plan, which is difficult to go with considering (As blake said) lots of grimm are blocking the road they’re supposed to pass by, while Weiss says it wouldn’t take long to go around, but Ruby was planning to just smash right through the pack of grimm and go on about their plan for patrol, a “win-win” plan, she says.

Not really sure how to explain their expressions here but its really interesting to me how while Blake does try to be realistic about everything and guide Ruby into making more rational choices, Weiss seems to follow Ruby without any disagreement as always, even coming up with the idea of going around the grimm. But she clearly looks upset as Ruby makes it clear she’s planning to just smash right through the grimm. Even though they don’t say anything else, you can see everyone being well aware that Ruby is being incredibly reckless. I think what they feel here isn’t disappointment at all, it’s showing how they’re worried about Ruby, but can’t really do much. Weiss even looks defeated I’d say.

Which then gets cut off by Yang slamming the door and calling out Ruby’s reckless behaviour, how she has been so driven and confident yet how shes been just throwing herself into danger, she then asks Ruby “don’t you care about the future?” And Ruby’s answer is really.. as we expected, honestly, but still painful especially considering she says it without a care in the world. “As long as we save remnant, what else is there?”

Mind you, Ruby isnt even paying attention to others, especially not Yang in this scene, shes playing with her scroll with a carefree attitude, like a child ignoring theyre being scolded for all the right reasons id say. Blake gets in between them to remind Ruby that the fight for remnant isnt just where they’re at right now, grounding Ruby a little and bringing her back to reality, out of her own mindspace she has created for herself to escape from everything, the harsh reality they’re reminding her of at the moment. And you can immediately see the shift in her behaviour, she sinks into herself, looking ashamed, because Ruby knows that shes being reckless, that shes just throwing herself into suicide missions on purpose just to get some thrill out of it if anything, she knows what shes doing is stupid and when called out, it makes her feel guilty. Because she knows they’re right, yet can’t help but overwork herself still.

Later, we see Ruby throwing herself into danger yet again, even in a new world with a new body without her semblance or crescent rose, she throws herself right into places and fights with the motto “only one way to find out” which causes Yang to get upset with her again. (I would like to mention that in that scene where Yang asks Ruby to promise that she won’t leave, Ruby doesn’t say anything)

This is the other end of the spectrum, Ruby is overconfident and overactive, incredibly reckless about her own life as she goes into situations without second thoughts about what will happen if something were to happen to her. She is still suicidal, just in different ways. Shes not actively seeking out ways to hurt herself, instead she’s doing the one thing that gives her some thrill and rush in the moment, something that actually makes her feel alive, and that is to fight, the only thing she knows. But she takes it too far by basically having a death wish in every battle.

Of course this triggers Yang’s abandonment issues pretty badly so I really hope we see some arguments between them in vol10, as we did in the movies

My idea of where Ruby stands after volume 9 is “Surviving doesn’t mean you’re healed”. Because even though Ruby did choose herself, and had a reassuring talk with Yang (vol9 extras) she still has the same issues. I wouldn’t put it past her to feel guilty for choosing herself instead of someone who can “actually do something” later on when they fail to do something yet again, which will naturally happen as there’s no such thing as winning only.

Maybe to some people, Ruby’s drastic change in behaviour (from hopeful to depressed to way too ‘confident’) is a sign of healing on the surface, but I think it shows that instead of healing she’s still stuck in the same place. Taking one step forward and falling three steps backwards.

I really hope that they take their time with Ruby’s recovery (if that happens) as this isn’t something that can be fixed with a talk or two, though some people will get upset with how she just “won’t get better” but thats the reality of it all. Healing from something like this takes a long time with a LOT of effort.

For Ruby to be completely fine again.. I think thats impossible, considering the amount of trauma, burden, pressure and pain she carries on her small shoulders alone. She’s still the one with silver eyes, who has to take it upon herself to save the world from an impossible fight, if one thing doesn’t bring her down, another will. But this time Ruby will slowly learn to lean on her teammates, just as she says to them, they’re a team and will always be there for each other. So Ruby plz listen to your own advice and be vulnerable sometimes.

Your memories have gotten weird. It's easier to recall ideas and thoughts you've had. You can sometimes remember the exact words someone spoke to you, and know you're not misremembering or making them up, they're too high fidelity for that. ## Day 1467 You've gotten really good at mental arithmetic over the few years. You weren't doing any sort of training, but any time a mathematical or even logical problem comes up, it feels much easier to get to an answer. The dread you've had from math is pretty much gone. Actually, most of your anxieties have disappeared. The world seems so much more grounded than it was before, as if it used to be an unstable vision that didn't keep its shape when you looked away. Now its all there, all the time, and a lot of it in your head. You can recognize people by their footsteps, detect emotions from their voice with complete certainty, recognize *your own* emotions as easily as the language you speak in, be it English or any of the 3 others you picked up on. You can also tell one of your friends is taking the pills too. You can sense it. Less like telepathy and more like a magnet recognizes another through its fields. You're noticing her changes, they're the same as yours were at her stage of the process. ## Day 2834 As they wheel the bed you lay on into the surgical suite, you don't feel human anymore. You're not an unemotional monster or anything, you still feel happiness, sadness, anger, if anything you feel them more than you ever did before, with so much more fidelity than ever. You still have desires and fears. You just feel so different from the person you used to be, and some things that used to be a part of your quintessential experience now just feels like a burden. Eating became boring, sleep is mostly a chore. You used to enjoy swimming and running but its been years since you last went.

One last time you confirm your identity to the surgical team, and a nurse presses a button next to the large magnet next to your head, knocking you out instantly. The doctor makes a large cut circumnavigating your scalp, then with a chemical solution works her way around your skull, dissolving it carefully down. A nurse lifts your hear off, revealing the innards. Instead of a squishy, pink brain, they find, as expected, a solid titanium sphere, built from billions of nanobots, carefully scanning sensing and replacing your neuron network one cell at a time, replicating its function precisely. As they worked, they also automated and simplified many of your functions, increasing efficiency and memory capacity.

The doctor lifts the sphere covered by sticky connective tissues upwards, severing them with tension, and transfers it into a receptacle on the side table. Along with the rest of the surgical team she moves onto your abdomen to remove your organs and other tissues for organ recipients around the country. ## day 1 You wake up. You feel different. better. You look around the room, at your hands, then body, legs. They look very much like your own, but instead of skin they're built from titanium sheathing and electric servos. All your desired changes have been implemented too of course. You feel content with yourself, as if you came home after a long trip. You step out of your alcove, getting a little notification in the corner of your vision reading "94% charged", and go make your way into the viewing room, following one of the arrows on the floor. You watch the surgeons remove the last pieces of what used to be you, box them in bio-secure containers and carry them out of the room before turning off the life support.

Beeeeeggg stretch Dalamadur commission