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Warnings: Blood, biting (ok its a vampire story so.) stalking I guess?
A/N: Very soon after the last chapter haha, I totally write this fast (I have up to chapter 10 done, I just finished editing today bc tht's th appropriate thing 2 do when u have finals ofc.)
Umm this is one of my fave chapters haha, the bite of 2016!
The next entry will be the Autumn Festival entry, a very long one! But I'm rly excited abt that one tho I will take some more time before posting it.
2016 October 1 - Saturday
Work went well today! I had to work with a guy named Daniel and someone named Morgan and I definitely fit right in with them!
Daniel told me to call him Danny, he’s in his 20s and I love his style (note to self: ask where he gets his piercings from). He’s super nice and funny. He plays his own playlist for the day and it’s like exactly the kind of pop music I haaaate and that hate has only increased today because after about an hour and a half it all starts over again. When there’s no customers he dances and sings along really badly too, which is honestly pretty funny though. Oh and he’s Benjamin’s boyfriend? I’d never expect those two to be a couple, talk about the definition of black cat x golden retriever couple.
Morgan’s a junior at our school and they’re really easy to talk to. They’re also really funny, they remind me a bit of Joy at times, like they have that same bluntness and stuff. Like they’ll just tell me I suck at doing something but in such a neutral way that I can’t even be offended. And then they add that I’ll get the hang of it.
I can already tell Saturdays are probably going to be my favourite, which is nice since I start my day at 8 and I really have to get used to getting up on weekends now. Benjamin and Missy took over when me and Morgan were done and Morgan walked with me until we had to split up, I can definitely see myself befriending them too!
I was already kinda anticipating Cas after work and yup, there he was, knocking on my window while I was listening to music and doodling a bit.
I asked if he’d let me have some blood again today and he was fine with that. He says he likes how eager I always am to drink his blood. Ew! And also that he thinks I’d make a good vampire. No thanks.
We went into the woods again, of course. We went up the same cliff again, though this time we took the long way and hiked up.
I’ve been thinking about how cool it kinda is that humans can drink vampire blood too? And that it’d be cool to bite a vampire I guess. Reverse the roles, sorta, you know? Joy would get me.
I don’t know what overcame me, but I just blurted it out. Like if I could bite him. He got this weird grin and for real let me do it!! He said I had to watch out and not take too much blood because that could kill me. A human can take a mouth full of blood max. Well I didn’t see myself take that much anyway, in the end it still tastes like blood, not tasty at all.
He asked where I wanted to bite him and I took his wrist, since that would be the least intim the easiest. Knowing that taking too much could kill me definitely made me more nervous about biting him. I knew I didn’t have to hold back, since he’d heal up quickly anyway. And so I bit him hard and deep. I hoped it’d hurt him a bit anyway, but he just made a cute weird little noise the moment I sunk my teeth in. He sorta guided me through it, I guess he also couldn’t afford to have me drop dead and having to explain at the Nexus that he let me drink his blood. He bled more heavily than I anticipated and I quickly started lapping up the blood and sucking at the wound.
It made me feel so powerful in a way, I dunno. Like I’m biting a fucking VAMPIRE right now! There’s something about doing this to someone who could just snap me in half if they wanted. I don’t know. I guess I did get really carried away because at some point he had to push me off. It was awesome!!! I feel like this kinda awakened something in me. Like usually you’re not really ‘allowed’ to bite people and draw blood, right? When I bit Anthony he had to get a tetanus shot haha. But that was under different circumstances, this was ho fun! I really hope he’ll let me do it again every time he’ll let me have some of his blood.
I asked if we were gonna go swimming again, since that’s what I assumed would be the plan since he brought me there again. But he said he wasn’t really in the mood anymore. That’s when I also noticed that I’d made a fucking mess of it and we’d both gotten blood on our clothes.. Cas offered to go to his place and he would handle it. ‘Since he’s an expert on getting blood out of clothes anyway.’ Yeah man, remind me of that shit again. Immediately made me wish I had torn a whole piece out of his arm.
He raced me to the edge of the woods and sadly won. So then I had to deal with him trying to rub it in as if I give a fuck about winning a stupid race against him. I noticed that just walking at a normal pace definitely seemed more challenging after drinking his blood. Cas made fun of the way I walked, though it wasn’t THAT bad I think. I just had to make sure I wouldn’t move too fast.
I gotta admit I was really excited to see where he’d live though. Like just because I’d been wondering where the vampires would live, you know? It turns out that they all do live in town, except for the vampires that are currently in hiding and supposed to be ‘dead’. They all do have some sort of studio apartment in the Nexus. Cas told me about how, once you go deeper inside, you reach the part where everyone lives and it’s basically like a super small underground town, with stores and buildings and all that (mannn I’d love to see that, it sounds really cool..). But to keep up the human guise, everyone lives in town outside the Nexus. The teen vampires get paired with adult vampires who pose as their caretakers and live with them.
I asked if he got along with his ‘parents’ and he told me the Venandi’s are like family. Even closer than biological families. Suuuure, that’s why they mutilate you when you break the rules. I didn’t say that out loud since I wasn’t in the mood to argue. He also told me that after graduation he’d get a shared apartment with one of his friends. Scott if I remember correctly? I think he’s in my history class, though he doesn’t show up often.
Cas actually lives closer to me than Gabriela does, like only two streets away. It was fun seeing his room, he’d hung up a lot of posters of bands and movies. He even had a few werewolf movie posters up too! His room was pretty messy (as expected). Lots of clutter, clothes on the floor, bed unmade.. He had a bunch of art supplies laying around, but immediately put his (what I assume) sketchbook away when we walked into his room. Kinda cu funny if he’s shy about his art. I wonder what kinda stuff he draws.
We both got undressed and he told me to just take something out of his closet. Or from the floor pile (no thanks). He has a lot of nice clothes honestly, it was pretty fun digging through his wardrobe. I ended up just taking a simple flannel and stuff though. While he was gone I looked around some more, he had a lot of comic books and cd’s on a shelf. He had a little box on his desk with jewelry, which I’d have loved to rummage through. And also a sewing machine and sewing supplies in the corner of his desk. I just love looking through people’s rooms cuz you can learn a lot of shit about them. Just seeing his room like that is so strange in a way, like in the end he’s also just a guy with a life outside the vampire stuff. With hobbies and all that, y’know?
When he got back, Cas reminded me that I still hadn’t given back his other clothes that he lent to me. I told him I’d decided to get back at him by stealing all his clothes until he has to come to school naked because he has no clothes left. Not gonna lie, he really has a lot of clothes I’d just wanna take and never give back. I shouldn’t have said that by the way because then he was like ‘oh so you wanna see me naked?’ Die!! I wonder if I’ll be getting my clothes back.. I noticed that it was getting dark, so I should probably go home. He tried to talk me into going into the woods with him anyway, but that’s really where I draw the line.
Only when he dropped me off at home, Cas decided to inform me that, since I’d drank a lot more blood than the other times, the effects would last way longer. He couldn’t tell me how long. Well it’s been 6 hours now and I still feel like a fucking vampire minus the fangs!! I ate dinner with mom (which tasted WEIRD because apparently all senses change when you drink vampire blood). And then locked myself in my room, because I’m not sure if mom would notice anything off about me.
I also found out that vampires can see in the dark. Though that makes sense, I guess. I'm sitting in the dark as I’m writing this.
Mannn I wish I could tell Joy about all this! I bit a guy and he let me drink his blood! And the guy is a vampire by the way. And also the blood gives me temporary vampire powers. I bet she’d drop everything and fly straight to Maine.
I had a really fun day. Honestly, I always have a lot of fun with Cas. He mostly dropped the whole humans are lame and weak-talk.. He still confuses me a lot though. It’s just weird, thinking about how he murdered someone a few weeks ago. I just cannot let that go.. And I shouldn’t! We haven’t talked about that at all anymore. Neither of us really want to, I guess. Ugh it’s just weird like in the moment I just forget all about it. And then I get home and am overcome with guilt once I start thinking. I want to hate him but I feel like I just don’t anymore, if I’m completely honest with myself. But I should, you know?
I’m starting to feel nauseous so I guess the blood is finally wearing off.
2016 October 2 - Sunday
Last night I was awfully dizzy and nauseous once the blood had worn off, I only managed to fall asleep by 5. I wish I had slept before it wore off so I’d just slept through it or something. I woke up cranky as hell, but still pulled myself together since Gabriela was gonna come over to help me with school.
Gabriela pretty soon asked me what I’d been up to yesterday. I was honest about it and told her I spend my Saturdays with Cas lately. I can tell she really doesn’t like it and that makes me feel guilty. I didn’t share a lot of details, also just because mom was home and I couldn’t have her hear me talk about me drinking his blood.
We really did manage to catch up on all my homework! From now on I’m for real gonna try to stay on top, I gotta get out of here!!! She also explained a bunch of stuff from Algebra class again and promised to send me her notes so I could use those when I’m studying.
Gabriela stayed over for dinner, she and my mom get along well! Not that I’m surprised. Mom also said she likes her a lot, after she left. Mom knows that me and Gabriela like each other. And that we were kissing when she got home last week (she felt so bad haha, she said next time I should send her a text when she’s over so she knows not to disturb us). She thinks we should just make it official, she doesn’t see the point of pretending like we aren’t basically girlfriends already. I guess she’s right. I might just bring it up next week at the autumn festival.. it just seems nice to do it on a special day..
After dinner we went up to my room and cozied up together. And made out again.. I really like her so much, I feel so happy when we’re together. It’s like we’ve known each other for years, like some missing piece fell into place when we met. That’s so cheesy but yeah, it’s true!
2016 October 3 - monday
Apparently Aiden and Jade saw me and Cas together this weekend. Uuuugghhh… Jade’s confused about why and since when I’m hanging out with Cas. I told her he’s nice when you get to know him, I CAN’T believe I said that! About CAS! Well what else am I supposed to say ‘he lets me drink his blood and then I can jump off cliffs and climb big buildings and it’s awesome’??
I took over Missy’s shift today after school and it was SO busy today, she dodged a bullet.. And so many difficult customers too, something was in the air today I guess. Daniel made it all bearable at least, I really enjoy working with him! I also met my co-worker Michelle, she’s a bit older than both me and Danny. It was way too busy to properly talk but from what I gathered she’s very nice! Things definitely went better than expected today, though the others also just knew exactly when to take over from me so that helped.
Me and Danny clocked out at 7 and he insisted on driving me home since it was dark already. He drives a baby blue fiat 500 haha, CUTE!!!
I’m so fucking tired now. I had planned to touch up my hair tonight but I’ll just do it tomorrow, I just wanna sleep right now.
2016 October 7 - friday
To celebrate the start of fall break, after school me, Gabriela, Libby, Aiden and Jade went to the wharf and rented a boat all afternoon. Libby keeps teasing us and asking if we’re official yet. We don’t kiss around other people but I guess it’s still pretty clear. And mannn sometimes I really have to fight the urge to give her a kiss. Mom’s right, there’s no point in stalling. I’m gonna bring it up again next monday, after the Autumn festival. We’ll have had a great day together and then that will just make it even better!
Afterwards we went to Aiden’s, since his parents are out of town right now and he and Jade cooked for all of us together. And we all watched Blades afterwards. I really loved this episode too, but I’m mourning Mal’s gorgeous locks (Joy was even more appalled when we texted tonight). It was a fun night, man I really love this group so much! I still can’t believe they all just accepted me into their friend group so easily. Everyone’s excited for me to experience the Autumn Festival. Gabriela will be picking me up next monday and then we’ll all meet up at the fairgrounds!
Something kinda weird did happen tonight though. After Gabriela dropped me off at home, I saw her outside, talking to Lewyn who was parked outside.. I don’t know if I should text her about it or ask her about it on Monday.. I feel like talking face to face will be much better, but I also know I’m just gonna worry all weekend about what that was about.
It prompted me to check in with mom again, but she didn’t tell me anything that seemed very significant. She’d called off the meeting with the sheriff after Lewyn had urged her to, so that’s good at least. But Lewyn knowing that she called a meeting in the first place really worries me. Especially after seeing the motherfucker lurking outside our house. Ugh I wish I could just kill him.
2016 October 8 - saturday
Cas didn’t come over today. I can’t believe I actually sat here and waited for hours. I refuse to text him and give him the idea that I’d miss him or something like that. He’d be so annoying about it, I just know it. It’s really just that by now I’m so used to it, it’s weird when we don’t hang out, you know?
Eventually I took it as a sign and instead texted Gabriela if we could meet up at the park, I just had to get it out of the way! Thankfully she had time. When she got there, the first thing she asked was like, about if it had to do with Cas. So protective haha.
She told me she just saw Lewyn in his car outside our house when she left and she told him to go away. That he’s keeping an eye on both of us now because we are friends. Ugh great, so he’s fucking stalking us?? BOTH of us, so I’m getting her in trouble now too?
Gabriela reassured me that it’ll be okay, that I don’t have to be scared. That monday we’ll have an amazing day to take everything off my mind.
Easier said than done, when I walked home it was getting dark and I couldn’t help but look over my shoulder every now and then. And to top it off I passed one of the Venandi elders who flashed her silver eyes at me for a second.
And umm the cat Wolf but im 2 lazy 2 dig up those posts
I imagine they have a bunch of pets thru their life esp Because they live so long.
Open or closed relationship? Do they sometimes share?
Open, Ik Cas gets w other ppl th most (+ theres this) + Ripley 2 at some point prolly tho I think in general Ripley's more likely to end up w someone Through Cas.
Gabe v rarely like she doesn't rly seek it out n stuff but I cn see esp Ripley hyping her up 2 approach someone lol.
Summary: Ripley and Gabriela go shopping for their baby for the first time.
Warnings: Teen pregnancy (Ripley is 19)
A/N: This one's been done for a whike but I wanted to wait until chapter 4 of the diaries was posted, since this is a scebe from that chapter! U don't have to read that one first to be able to read this one though!
Credit: Dividers: @/cafekitsune
Ripley’s eyes lit up when Gabriela entered the coffee shop, the bell above the door cheerfully announcing her presence. She hoped she wouldn’t be able to tell she’d been bawling her eyes out just about an hour ago. Her morning had been the worst.
Saturdays used to be her favourite day at work, sure it was busy, sure she could be sleeping in, but she loved working with Mo and Danny. Or rather, she used to. Danny hadn’t survived the night the Creator had attacked and unlike her, he didn’t get a second chance at life. He was gone and never coming back and his absence was so damn loud.
Gabriela appeared to her like a bright sun breaking through the clouds after a somber gray day and for the first time in hours Ripley didn’t have to force her smile. She wasn’t sure if the fluttery feeling in her stomach was the baby—still so small it was easy to miss whenever they moved—or butterflies because Gabriela looked so pretty in that dress and she was so excited to wrap her in her arms once her shift was over.
“Hi gorgeous!” She could see Nick startle in the corner of her eye. He had to relax, she wouldn’t flirt with customers. Well, okay, she was flirting with a customer right now, but this customer was the other mom of the baby she was currently cooking up, she wasn’t just a customer.
Though it probably didn’t help that sometimes they loved to roleplay as strangers for shits and giggles when Gabbie stopped by at work.
“What can I get started for you?”
“One cappuccino, please!” Gabriela tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.
“Coming right up!” It amazed her how much her presence had lifted her mood. She hummed as she worked on her order.
After finishing she wrote ‘Gambie’ on the cup, and doodled a little deer next to it before setting it down on the counter. Gabriela giggled when she saw it. “Cute.”
“Anything else?”
“Yes, please!” Gabbie’s eyes flit to the pastry display. “What would you recommend?”
Ripley smiled, knowing she was really just asking about what she’d like to have after her shift.
“l think you— um, you look like someone who’d really enjoy the chocolate cake!” Oh Nick was probably so weirded out right now. “But I’ve personally really been enjoying the red velvet cupcakes. Ooh, or the lemon cupcakes…” She had to reel herself in a little, before she’d just end up listing everything inside the display. “Well honestly you can just surprise m— yourself.”
Amused, Gabriela put her elbows on the counter and leaned forward. “Well, then… could I get two slices of chocolate cake, one red velvet cupcake, one lemon cupcake aaand…” She glanced at all the cookies and pastries inside the display again. “And one of those oreo cupcakes, please?”
Ripley’s eyes went big. “Wow, that’s a lot, are you sure?” Well she hoped she was sure, because she already looked forward to eating all of it after work. But still, that was over fifteen dollars spent on baked goods. She wasn’t even halfway through her pregnancy and had already been watching her spending, everything felt expensive or unnecessary now.
Behind her she could hear Nick gasp. Mo, who was helping him with restocking, whispered, “it’s fine dude, that’s her girlfriend. And she’s one of us.” The Creator attack had forced Nick out of a ten year slumber and he was obviously still very out of the loop.
Ripley got a warm feeling in her chest at the word ‘girlfriend’. Sure, she’d been avoiding using the word herself. But just knowing other people saw them like that anyway… Well, it didn’t bother her at all.
Gabriela nodded. “Yeah, don’t worry about it! I’ll take it to go.”
“Alright!”
As Ripley packed her order, a group of teenagers entered the shop. Gabriela sat down at one of the seats by the window, sipping her coffee as Ripley did her thing for the final fifteen minutes of her shift, making silly faces at each other whenever they made eye contact.
They waved her co-workers goodbye as they exited the coffee shop. Ripley could smell the pastries inside Gabbie's bag and had to do her best not to start drooling.
Gabriela entwined her fingers with hers. “I thought I’d surprise you and pick you up. How was your day? How do you feel?”
“Oh. Um, it sucked, honestly, but it’s whatever really. Like no one yelled at me or whatever, I’m just being emo! You already cheered me up a lot by showing up!” She pressed a quick kiss on top of Gabbie’s head and gave her hand a squeeze. “Aside from that I feel pretty good, though!”
When Gabriela guided her around a different corner than usual a few minutes later, Ripley asked, “hey, I thought we were going to my place?”
With a cheeky glint in her eye, Gabriela looked up at her. “It’s a surprise! But I think it’ll cheer you up even more.”
As they passed the pizzeria, the post office and finally the jeweler, Ripley realised where she was taking her and came to an abrupt stop.
Nervously, Ripley fiddled with the hem of her t-shirt and chewed her lip. “I— what if someone sees us?”
Gabriela chuckled. “Then what?” She extended her hand at her again and Ripley took it. “Are you planning to keep it secret the whole time?”
“No, but—”
Gently, she playfully poked Ripley’s stomach. “People will know soon enough anyway!” She started walking again, pulling Ripley along with her. “I thought we could get something for the baby together, just to celebrate now that we can, you know?”
Ripley liked the idea of that. Though a part of her felt like Cas should be there too. Or at least she wanted him to be there… But she knew he wasn’t ready for that yet. Not even close.
They politely greeted the lady behind the counter as they entered the baby store. She already felt her cheeks go warm, she’d walked around with this secret for a while, it felt wrong not actively hiding it. The past weeks she’d lingered in front of the window a few times, but she’d never dared to go inside. Especially while she was trying not to get attached.
But now she also felt herself getting excited as she looked around the store. It was still hard to believe they even got to do this together! The same excitement radiated from Gabriela. She felt so incredibly lucky with Gabbie’s reaction to the pregnancy, especially considering the baby obviously was Cas’ kid. Yet she didn’t seem to give a damn about that.
Gabriela came to a stop in front of a rack with baby clothes. As Ripley started browsing through all the little shirts and rompers—marvelling at how tiny they were—Gabriela leaned into her.
“Look!” Gabriela took a romper with a wolf embroidered onto it off the rack.
“Ohhh…” Ripley whispered as she tried her best not to open up the waterworks again today.
Quickly she composed herself. “I dunno if I wanna get them anything wolf themed though. Um besides Uncle Thomas’ books, I guess. Don’t wanna be one of those parents that, like, force their interests onto their kids, you know?”
Gabriela chuckled and rolled her eyes at her. “Oh come on, it wouldn’t be like that…” She picked up some socks with cat paws on the soles. “How about this?”
Ripley groaned. “I don’t know how I’m gonna make it out of here without crying, that’s so cute...”
Everything was just so tiny, just like their baby would be once they were finally here. She could already so easily picture Gabriela with a little baby in her arms and she was so grateful she’d get to see her become a mother, knowing she’d do a great job.
Hand-in-hand they strolled through the store, looking at the blankets, the toys, the decorations. Until finally they reached a rack filled with stuffed toys. “I think I’d like to get one of these for the baby,” she said to Gabriela.
Gabriela immediately picked up a little stuffed wolf. “This one right?” Playfully she waved its paw at Ripley.
But Ripley shook her head. “Wolves can just stay my thing for now.”
Gabriela chuckled as she put it back in the rack. “I feel like you’ll probably get plenty of wolves on the baby shower anyway.”
Ripley frowned slightly. Baby shower? She wasn’t sure if she wanted to have a baby shower at all. Quickly she focussed on the plushies again, no sense in discussing that stuff right now anyway.
Together they searched through all the stuffed animals, feeling the fabric, testing how soft they were. Until finally they both reached for a little gray elephant at the same time. Immediately they looked at each other, a look of understanding passing between them.
This one.
She didn’t know why, but she just felt so drawn to it. It had a blue and white checkered tummy and pink, round cheeks. It wasn’t too big or too small. It didn’t look too girly or boyish.
“Their first plushie.” She whispered, holding it out in front of her, already having a strong feeling this would one day be their little one’s favourite plushie.
Baby stuff is so so tiny and cute and precious like I just enjoy shopping for baby stuff for other people, like having a baby shower? Let me buy the cutest tiniest little things! ughh it's so cute
I'm sure walking through there brought all sorts of emotion to Ripley. It's a lot!
I love that Ripley is keeping the wolfie thing her thing for now. It's sweet to let River have her own thing. Plus after having kids I feel like parents lose a lot of their interests, so letting Ripley keep that for her she still gets something that's hers!
Yees, Ripley wld have no issue sharing the werewolf interest with River but I also know Ripley actually rly loves how different River is from her. Ik Because River loves elephants sm th trio all just end up being pulled into that too to some degree haha.
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i was working on a fun lil rewrite of ch1 of immortal desires and ofc jia is being an ass, i need to rewrite it but i think its kind of funny. Wait. Lemme grab my laptop and give yall the current opening paragraph
Jiahao could not believe these townies called this a kickback. There were so many things wrong with it: one (1) it was in a clearing of a forest; (2) there was no live music, just a couple cheap speakers set to their max volume; (3) there was nobody here –well, like, no one important; and, most offensively, all the ‘places to sit’ were limited to the ground, the hard plastic chairs, or logs and stumps. When the popular kid –Gabriel? Gavin?– had invited her along, Jiahao had only come along because she assumed his popularity would filter out the dud parties, but if this was how Crimson Beech threw down… then she needed to order the first car out of here. Chicago was hell with her parents’ divorce but at least the parties were good.
Last time I watched ATLA is over a decade ago so idk how much I cn say in reply, but I wanted 2 send sth anyway:
Sfw: 9, 10, 12
Nsfw: 3
yaaay yippie thank u :3 =^w^=
9. Is someone multilingual? Do they try to teach another language to the other? How does it go?
ngl this is one of the ones that doesn't really apply to them, bc we never hear a character speak a language that isn't Whatever Language You're Watching It In, but its a good What If situation. the What If being "what if there was language worldbuilding in atla" and not "modern, regular world au". bc i dont like those for atla.
for Lu Ten, im kind of stuck between "because he's second in line for the throne, he would have been taught multiple languages for diplomatic reasons" and "the fire nation would Not do that" but i'm leaning more to he wouldn't know any others
Akio i think wouldn't have learned any others growing up, but he would do his best to learn the language of wherever he's stationed in, but he wouldnt be that good at it. i doubt any people would be too keen on teaching their language to a soldier there to invade and colonize their home
10. Any pets? Or plants?
while they never ended up living together (beyond sharing a tent while on active duty), they did like to talk about what it would be like if they could & not have to worry about the war or Lu Ten's duties as prince of the fire nation. they decided they would have had a cat together, and a few tea plants
12. Can they stand silence? Who talks the most? Who talks the least?
Lu Ten loves to yap, and Akio likes to listen to him, but theyre often both in a comfortable silence with each other. gay relationships being illegal in the fire nation means that they'll often not talk when there's other people around lest someone figures Something out
nsfw under the cut!!!
3. Any kinks they clash on?
ooough thats a really good question....... i dont knowwww... i think most of they time the sex they had was pretty vanilla just bc they felt vanilla sex would be easier to hide from other people than kinkier stuff. and also i think Akio's a kind of roll-with-the-punches sort of dude, so even if Lu Ten were to bring up something he'd find odd he'd probably try it at least once. not that they had much time to explore their kinks together anyway #myfridgedwife
i can see Akio saying "that's weird. you're weird" about a kink Lu Ten brings up but then he'd do it anyway. bc how can he say no to his pretty pretty princess
but its a good What If situation. the What If being "what if there was language worldbuilding in atla" and not "modern, regular world au". bc i dont like those for atla.
Yaaa thts what I was thinking haha
and "the fire nation would Not do that"
Yeah I cn rly see tht
i can see Akio saying "that's weird. you're weird" about a kink Lu Ten brings up but then he'd do it anyway. bc how can he say no to his pretty pretty princess
I've been making a fic reading list 4 myself n if u guys have any fics u want 2 get read/think I'd like u cn send an ask or reply 2 this or Whateverrrr
Cn b any length but know tht if its over 6k words itll prolly take a while bc I like reading in 1 sitting n i rly gotta have th time + be in th mood for that haha
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A/N: Just a warning beforehand that though it's no self harm, I'm unsure if th cutting here would still be triggering on that front, so just putting it out there.
Very very short chapter this time but I didn't wanna attach th next day to it so!
Also what I said abt not posting 4 a while was a Lie ig, idk I will halt updates at some point but 4 now I feel like I'm prolly not gonna wanna add anything as I go on so yeah.
2016 September 24 - saturday
I guess it’s just gonna become a thing that Cas picks me up every Saturday. Though I was surprised to even see him after last Tuesday. This was the first time I saw him since our fight, I haven’t seen him at school at all ever since. Today he just acted like nothing happened and I decided not to bring it up anymore (for now) either.
We went into the forest again, of course. I told Cas I wanted to know more about how vampire healing works. Since I’ve noticed that any injuries he gets, go away pretty fast. And he takes out his knife again and tells me to cut his arm, ‘cause why not just show me’. So I did. It was kinda cathartic, I can’t believe he just let me do that! But as I watched the cut close up almost immediately, I got why he was so nonchalant about it in the first place.. I didn’t know it’d be that fast! I don’t know but there’s just something about watching it heal up like that, that’s so cool to me.. Like real life special effects or something. I’m just so fascinated by how vampire bodies work.
I asked him if it hurt and he said it only stung a little bit. He compared it to what being scratched feels like for humans. So obviously they have way higher pain tolerance too! That makes sense I guess. I asked if I could keep going and he just let me.. I ended up carving bigger shapes and words (and my name! hehe) into his arm and stuff, I kinda had fun. Though it felt kinda gross too because all his brand scars are a bit raised and it just feels kinda weird cutting through them. The deeper I cut, the longer it took to heal. He seemed so proud of himself or something, like he always does when he shows me his abilities. There’s something endearing about I wonder what would happen if a vampire lost an arm or something. Or if their guts spilled out, like how would that heal? What if they lost a tooth or an eye?? Would it grow back?
I really should note down all the questions I have, because I often just kinda forget in the moment. I did finally think to ask Cas if werewolves exist too though! He said he hadn’t ever heard anything about them but he wouldn’t really be surprised if they existed either. I asked what other supernaturals do exist for sure, but he had no idea. He didn’t seem to really care either.
Cas said that since he let me use him as a cutting board, I should do something for him too. And ok my heart sank like… Is he gonna ask to drink my blood??? (or even worse: just take it), because no way in hell will I let him do that. But then he said he just wanted to go for a swim in the lake again, but without giving me any blood this time. I thought he was gonna be a complete cunt about it or something now that I was a lot weaker than him and stuff.. But he was surprisingly gentle with me.. like I had fun. Like he still annoyed me by making waves at me and swimming too fast for me to keep up and stuff, but he didn’t hurt me. (I would’ve had more fun if he’d given me blood though, but I’m not gonna nag him about it..)
While we dried off I thought of asking him how often he killed humans. But I’m still not sure if I want to know. Am I just sticking my head in the sand? I don’t know, I can’t help but feel disappointed in myself, for just hanging out with someone like him as if he doesn’t regularly just end the lives of people with hopes and dreams and families.. And just like it’s nothing. Like I remember him saying he does this all the time. He seems uncomfortable talking about that night, but I think that’s more to protect his friend.. But also his reaction earlier this week makes me feel like he DOES have a bit of a conscience..
I skyped with Joy while trying to do my homework tonight and filled her in on everything. Minus the crazy supernatural stuff of course. But like about the job and stuff. And Cas and Gabriela. I managed to somehow talk Cas into sending me a picture of himself for Joy (where he sticks up his middle finger though, of course). And Joy thinks he’s cute. BAAAARF!! Okay he isn’t ugly at all I guess. If I was into guys he would probably be the kind of guy I’d be into, since he doesn’t look boring at least. And if he wasn’t a murdering cannibal and all that. Joy asked if she could have him, since I didn’t want him. I told her she could do muchhh better. Joy asked why we even hang out if I don’t like him. I don’t even know, I mean I can’t tell her about the blood and stuff, obviously.
2016 September 25 - sunday
I was so bored this morning, even though I could’ve worked on my homework I guess. But instead I decided to text Gabriela to ask if she’d like to go for a ride with me.
I picked her up around 1 pm and decided to surprise her and take her to Redport since I’m getting bored of just always staying in town. I thought maybe we could’ve stopped by the beach, now that it’s not that cold yet.
On the way we passed that castle too, so I asked her about it, of course. Or well, Gabriela corrected me and said it’s actually a small fort and NOT a castle. All she knows is that it belonged to the vampire hunters and this one was used as a retreat safe from vampires and to store weapons. There’s some more forts deeper into the forest, one of them is bigger and that one’s where they kept and tortured the vampires they captured so they wouldn’t be like right in town. I asked if we could go there sometime, but Gabriela told me it’d be a bad idea.
But then after we’d been driving for about 10 minutes, I looked over at her and she looked like she was about to keel over or something. She said she thought she got her period, so I immediately turned around, of course. Oh man, I thought my periods were bad.. like she got all flushed and sweaty and she was shivering really bad when just a few minutes before she was completely fine. I offered to come with her, but she really didn’t want me to, maybe she doesn’t like me seeing her like that? I mean I get it but I don’t think she’s weak for it or anything.
After I dropped her off I stopped by that little convenience store next to the bookstore and got her some snacks, since she did that for me last time too. When I stopped by her house to drop them off, her aunt opened the door. Something about her was kinda weird like, I dunno I can’t put my finger on it, I mean, she seemed nice? But okay yeah, I don’t know. Like I get she’s not her mom, I’m just used to my friends’ parents showing more interest in who their kid’s hanging out with, I guess? Maybe they’re just not that close. I can tell she doesn’t ever really want to hang out at her place, I just don’t really wanna pry.. Is that bad? I dunno. I figured if she wants to talk, she’ll bring it up, right?
2016 September 27 - tuesday
I had my first day at work! Obviously I still need to get the hang of things, but I think it helps that they don’t have like 5 million drinks on the menu, like at some other places. Most of the time it’s pretty quiet, but every now and then there’s a big surge of customers, which made me understand why the extra help was welcome. Another girl from school, Missy, was also working today. She’s in my English, Algebra and Spanish classes, though I didn’t really know her until today, though she stood out to me cuz she’s really pretty. She seemed really nice so far! She didn’t mind helping me when I needed it. And so did my boss, her name is Marian. She’s really nice in general! I dunno but for some reason I feel so relieved to finally have met a vampire who’s friendly. She kinda has the same vibes as Lisa, maybe that’s why I really want her to like me and I already liked her right away too.
I’m still super behind on my schoolwork, but Gabriela said she’d help me try and tackle most of it next Sunday!
2016 September 29 - Thursday
Survived my second day at work! I’m still feeling very good about the job. Today I worked with Jill and Benjamin.
Jill’s in my History, Economics and Algebra classes but I hadn’t really talked to her before besides borrowing a pen from her and telling her I liked some pins on her backpack. She was really nice though and she suggested walking to work together each Thursday since we both have fixed schedules. We chatted about music and movies we like and stuff, I could see us becoming friends!
Benjamin’s older than us (like in his 20s?) and I’m not sure what to think of him. Like he was nice and very patient with teaching me stuff (and a good teacher too) but he just gave me weird vibes, like it didn’t feel genuine or something I guess? I dunno maybe it’s just paranoia from the past weeks, like I’m definitely just always on my guard more. And like, people disliking me right off the bat isn’t necessarily a new thing to begin with.. He’s just like, very serious, maybe it’s just that? I don’t know.
2016 September 30 - Friday
Today was very uneventful, I kinda embarrassed myself in history class because I wasn’t paying attention and then got asked a question in front of everyone. But like if that’s the worst thing that happens on a day I’m honestly happy, with everything going on.
Me and Gabriela hung out at the park after school, the weather’s still so nice! I really love hanging out with her, no matter what we do.
Me and mom got take-out and watched Blades together tonight. It's nice to sorta have some kinda ritual every Friday now, I guess? Spending time with mom feels extra important right now. There haven’t been any more murders lately, maybe things will just be okay after all.
i like that one post that it’s like, chris playing tennis with claire for the first time and thinking she has never played it before because he never asked her about it (recurrent with him) and then going haha i’ll go easy on you 😆 and five minutes later discovering claire thinks she’s at roland-garros and going woww you’re intense😅. and then they do this every saturday morning for the next three years
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