Part time human

Free hysterectomy

Me after my

bugs when you lift up a rock

i go to the shop and I ask if they have any raspberries. they say no, they used to sell raspberries, but they haven't had any in stock in the last 15 years. I ask if there's somewhere else I can go to buy raspberries. They say no, with confidence and pride, they're the only shop around who has ever sold or will ever sell raspberries. Other shops might sell other fruit, sure, but they have a monopoly on all raspberries forever. I ask if they're possibly planning on them selling them again in future? they say they can't tell me that.

it's so funny when men try to act like walter white is a stoic badass when he spends 50% of the show's run time looking like this

The best genre of family portrait is and will always be Husband With Multiple Kids Making Come Hither Eyes At His Wife

Going to add my fave - Family Portrait by Anton Einsle

watching an old disney movie