Part time human

i have chocolate chip eggo waffles in the chest freezer i want so bad right now but to get to the garage i have to cross the pasture and tonight a fell wind blows…

not to "trying to be chill but can't help noticing how misogyny bleeds through the cracks etc etc" but once you realize that almost none of the cute disney comic relief sidekicks are women you can't unsee it. like that thing only exists to do some slapstick and look cute for plushies. why can't it be a woman. why are ALL of them he/him. it's driving me fucking insane

I would like to formally apologize to everyone. I had no idea what consequences my actions would create but I should have been more careful anyway. I should have remembered this is a Genie Website and I should have clarified that when I want more female nonhuman comedic relief characters, I did not mean I wanted Olaf the Snowman to have an intensely heterosexual love interest in Frozen 3. I will do my best to go through each post with a team of lawyers going forwards to ensure this never happens again.

i just found a 9,000,000 leaf clover

sliding you a note that says "do you fantasize about putting me under extreme physical, emotional, and/or mental duress? circle yes/no" with a bunch of hearts doodled around it

when the guitar solo starts touching your clit

Lets work on healthy habits like not saying this

lets work on healthy habits like minding your own damn business

you thought tumblr in the 2010s was bad but last year i joined a community garden and a member in his 60s just emailed blasted all of us a ten page pdf call out post about one of the other member's problematic behavior and rules violations

one of his (many) complaints is that she is wiccan and has been actively recruiting female members to her coven during garden meetings (true) and also planting invasive species (rules violation) in the four corners of the garden (rules violation, planting in communal space) and when they dig them up to remove them there are jars filled with talismans and feathers and stuff in the dirt underneath

yes she's white yes she has dreads

Primadonna worm all i ever wanted was to squirm

remember to completely fumble every single beautiful woman you meet

"Consensual, but still weird" is underrated in toxic freaky shipping world. There are many ways you can make it weird while still having everyone agree to it

They consented but at what cost

make your subtitles accurate to what’s being said or i will kill you!!!!

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

Reblog to materialize $250,000 in prev's bank account

if I was cupid I'd line up trickshots to form polycules all the time. it'd be all I ever do

tumblr putting my head on a platter