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the place I work at remodeled these split gendered restrooms into “inclusive restrooms” and never told us what they meant while construction was ongoing. I need you to know every atom of potential criticism or whining that could’ve happened disappeared when people found out this meant we got 10 fully separate private bathrooms with sinks inside. I’ve not heard a single person crack a joke about the inclusive signage. this is the world TERFs are trying to steal from you
This is called a "superloo" and terfs are actively trying to steal this from you, in the UK they changed bathroom regulations to mean new buildings have to prioritise gendered toilets rather than build superloos.
This also upset a lot of architects and designers who like the superloos. They're also typically more like small rooms rather than having doors you can look under.
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i was chatting with a coworker about this whole saga today and someone nearby popped into the convo to be like “you know, you can use chatgpt to write a demand letter!” and i sort of blinked and went, “okay. i did it myself, though.” and she was like, “yeah but it can tell you what laws and stuff are relevant” and i was like, “i also did research myself.” and she was very well-meaning but she said “chatgpt” like six more times before she left and it was genuinely baffling to me, this insistence on it.
and in the one hand, did i enjoy spending hours researching housing regulations in my state? not especially. drafting this email was stressful. but on the other hand, did i learn a lot by doing that research? yeah, i did. i’m more prepared for my current and future leases. i used some of that info to make decisions about a new renter’s insurance policy. i already told three different people about things i learned that are relevant to their leases that they didn’t know yet. (pro tip: see if you’re supposed to be getting annual interest payments on your security deposit! also look up what specific appliances your landlords must legally provide as of 2026.) i also got to reconnect with my cousin for a bit because her job gave her specific insight on part of the situation, and i’d much rather do that than have a chatbot make shit up for me.
also, i drafted that email with the power of friendship (friends angry on our behalf) and spite (from landlords telling me not to do my research). chatgpt could never.
Please never use generative AI tools for any kind of legal dispute. It does not know what laws or court cases are. It will make up something that sounds favorable to you, and you will get crushed. There are free resources out there to learn this stuff. And sometimes attorneys will offer free consultations or volunteer at a free legal clinic. OP didn't just do it themselves to do extra work or some shit. This is really the only viable way to do things short of hiring a professional to do it for you.
ChatGPT is not easier or faster in matters like this. It is a shot to the foot.
Anarcha Westcott was a young Black girl enslaved in Alabama. After a traumatic childbirth, she developed vaginal and rectal fistulas, a condition that left her in constant pain and shame.
Instead of receiving care, she was experimented on over 30 times by Dr. J. Marion Sims, who operated on her without anesthesia. He used her body to develop a surgery that would later be used to treat white women, with pain relief, dignity, and consent.
Anarcha didn’t agree to any of it. She wasn’t a patient. She was a victim of medical violence.
Today, she is finally being remembered, not as a statistic, but as one of the true Mothers of Modern Gynecology, alongside Lucy and Betsey.
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aint it crazy how many people realize they're queer when they have the language to express how they feel and a support system to encourage self exploration????
right at the beginning when she's like how do I help my son feel loved and accepted I'm here shouting
"QUEEN YOU ALREADY DID THAT BY TAKING HIS SIDE AND LEAVING THAT NO GOOD HUSBAND FOR HAVING THE AUDACITY TO KICK YOUR BABY OUT!"
And Good for her! this is the only response to a man who kicks out a child.
the bad thing about having unhealthy habits due to mental illness, is when you DO do something healthy style you can't brag about about it because then people will then know you've been doing it yucky style all along. Like you can't brag you changed your sheets or brushed your teeth because then ppl will be like oh did you not brush your teeth regularly before? Thats yucky disgusting! So you just gotta keep it to yourself. And be proud alone, I suppose.
These are rules I generally adhere to in my own writing, they aren't gospel or meant to be the end all be all of writing. Also it should be noted that like all rules, these too are made to be broken when and where it serves the text. This is not about grammar or Correct Use of King's English™, this is just a list of personal style choices.
Anyway.
1. Indicate who's speaking as quickly as possible.
See difference between:
"Wait, does anyone have an extra eraser? I could swear I brought one, but I can't find it."
"You can use mine. Though if you steal it, I will kill you."
"Nice. I'm changing my brother's name to Gerry, is that okay?"
"You had two weeks to come up with your backstory."
And:
"Wait, does anyone have an extra eraser?" Melanie asks. "I could swear I brought one, but I can't find it."
"You can use mine," Jan says. "Though if you steal it, I will kill you."
"Nice," Melanie says. "I'm changing my brother's name to Gerry, is that okay?"
Annie says, "You had two weeks to come up with your backstory."
But this looks like talking heads in a blank void talking to each other, so, give the characters bodies and physicality, which brings us to rule 2.
2. no talking heads in void.
Though people do just sit around talking without doing anything else, it's not that interesting to read and also, gotta remember that readers can't see what you see in your head while writing. You gotta actually give them something to latch a mental image onto, so. Characters should move and emote.
"Wait, does anyone have an extra eraser?" Melanie asks, rummaging through her bag. "I could swear I brought one, but I can't find it."
"You can use mine," Jan says, nudging his own eraser over. It's in the shape of an old fashioned motorcycle. "Though if you steal it, I will kill you."
"Nice," Melanie says and snatches it up to do quick edits on her character sheet. "I'm changing my brother's name to Gerry, is that okay?"
Annie gives her a flat look. "You had two weeks to come up with your backstory."
Now you can sorta tell what they're talking about. Just don't go overboard - dialogue has a momentum and a rhythm, and too much description can overwhelm it.
3. Character Action and Character Dialogue go on the same paragraph.
See difference between this:
Melanie rummaged through her backpack.
"Wait, does anyone have an extra eraser? I could swear I brought one, but I can't find it."
"You can use mine."
Jackson nudged his own eraser over. It was the shape of a motorcycle.
"Though if you steal it, I will kill you."
"Nice."
Melanie snatches it up to do quick edits on her character sheet.
"I'm changing my brother's name to Gerry, is that okay?"
Annie gives her a flat look.
"You had two weeks to come up with your backstory."
And this:
Melanie rummaged through her backpack. "Wait, does anyone have an extra eraser? I could swear I brought one, but I can't find it."
"You can use mine." Jackson nudged his own eraser over. It was the shape of a motorcycle. "Though if you steal it, I will kill you."
"Nice." Melanie snatches it up to do quick edits on her character sheet. "I'm changing my brother's name to Gerry, is that okay?"
Annie gives her a flat look. "You had two weeks to come up with your backstory."
Not only does it make the text way more cohesive and snappy but, once again, it's much more clear who is saying what - but even then, I prefer to use dialogue indicators. Text like this to me looks like maybe there's a voiceover going on or something.
4. No mixing and matching characters. One character per paragraph.
This is one of my most broken rules, but in general it's character per paragraph.
So, none of this:
Melanie rummaged through her backpack while Annie set up the DM screen. "Wait, does anyone have an extra eraser? I could swear I brought one, but I can't find it."
"You can use mine." Jackson nudged his eraser over and Melanie snatched it up "Though if you steal it, I will kill you." Melanie begun making quick edits.
"Nice. I'm changing my brother's name to Gerry, is that okay?" Beside her, Annie gave her a flat look.
"You had two weeks to come up with your backstory."
Mixing and matching who's doing what like this makes it hard to see who's saying what, it makes the dialogue messy. However, this is fine.
While Annie set up the DM screen, Melanie rummaged through her backpack "Wait, does anyone have an extra eraser?" she asked. "I could swear I brought one, but I can't find it."
"You can use mine." Jackson nudged his eraser over and Melanie snatched it up. "Though if you steal it, I will kill you," he added.
"Nice. I'm changing my brother's name to Gerry, is that okay?" Melanie ask, grinning at the look Annie gave her.
"You had two weeks to come up with your backstory," Annie says flatly.
Note that in mixing and matching like this, it's all the more important to point out who is saying what. In general though, I tend to minimise this sort of stuff.
5 is kinda rule 1 rehashed, but, again, indicate who is speaking upfront. Especially when there's a larger piece of dialogue.
Sometimes, people aren't actually reading - sometimes for various reasons they're using text to speech, or maybe someone does a podfic or something. Even in visual reading, when there's a big block of dialogue without indicators it can be hard to follow.
So instead of:
"If Melanie can change her background, can I add a cool uncle to mine? I want a cool uncle - like, a gunslinger or something. Or a wizard - oo, a wizard uncle! He can be creepy and vague and give me problematic spells!" Jackson says eagerly.
I'd rather do:
Jackson puts his hand up. "If Melanie can change her background, can I add a cool uncle to mine?" he asks eagerly. "I want to give Kaiser a cool uncle - like, a gunslinger or something. Or a wizard - oh, a wizard uncle! He can be creepy and vague and give me problematic spells!"
Especially so when there's multiple characters talking and maybe one character hasn't been talking as much as the others - if they jump back into the discussion, it should be noted.
6. Limit your bits.
But as said before, every rule is made to be broken, and I break my own rules all the time. When I do it, though, it's generally for the bit, to make the text more interesting. Stuff like bits of dialogue without any indicators who is saying what to show that there's a faceless crowd speaking all at once, or two characters going back and forth, stuff like that.
"Jackson's dude has Main Character Energy," Melanie says solemnly.
"Kaiser is the anime protagonist," Jan agrees. "We're just NPCs in his world."
"The cheerleaders of his adventurers."
"Founding members of his harem."
They nod in perfect understanding and agreement.
For a couple of lines, exchanges like this can be fun - if the back and forth goes on for 12 lines, though, it will get tiresome.
There are other bits I do, and again, I break my own dialogue writing rules a lot for stylistic reasons to make the text more interesting or to give it better rhythm, or whatever. Sometimes, there's no dialogue at all, sometimes there's no indicators. There's no actual rules in writing, even grammar is all made up. These are more guidelines than anything.
But I hope the effort makes the dialogue more readable.
I read a study once on the fuel efficiency of various types of commuter vehicles (car, bus, train) on a per person basis and the number of people needed riding public transit to match the "efficiency" of cars is shockingly low. A bus needs to carry like 3-4 people to be fuel efficient, and trains require 2-3 per train car. Both often carry two dozen or more during peak hours, more than justifying any perceived requirements for efficiency for the train or bus to provide service the entire day.
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Just watched Adam Conover (of Adam Ruins Everything) make such a solid point that I think we should spread far and wide. Yes, having AI write your emails is lazy, sure, but people love being lazy. We need to really emphasize that sending AI emails (or using AI responses on social media, or publishing AI flyers, or or or) is rude.
It's rude. You're making someone take their time to read something you couldn't bother to write. You're telling them they were so unimportant you couldn't be bothered to actually take the time to say something yourself. And frankly, you're lying about it while you're at it.
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