¯\_(ツ)_/¯

electric stoves aren’t real btw they’re placebo stoves. your food cooks because of the placebo effect

yeah no its just a bunch of LEDs that turn red, it only boils water because you expect the water to boil

when i die i will be converted into a beautiful pdf

i could be the person who changes the stoplights. red. yellow. green. red. yellow. green. it comes naturally to me

im the prettiest canary in this mine

what the fuck is that smell

if ur in a tough situation and don't know what to do immediately escalate to violence. follow me for more life advice ❤️

uniqlo needs to do a medieval monk collection

they did not call me any particular nickname in college because I did not have any characteristics or traits

They need to invent a job where I don't have to wake up or go to it

everybody in the club going yippee

i plan on becoming a child prodigy at 44

(violently jerking the steering wheel) my car swerves like crazy when i do this