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@retailflail
july 3rd on tumblr: happy peaceful blogging
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Infographic:Â 7 Reasons This Is An Excellent Resume For Someone With No Experience
yoooo what i need by tomorrow
AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU
Reblogging because I WISH I HAD FUCKING KNOWN ABOUT THIS IN HIGH SCHOOL YEARS AGO!
Dear sick Kitties, Please save this to your computer because one day you might be well enough to work in some capacity and itâs unfair for you to have blank spots on your resume/CV. You have worth and validity even if you donât have a huge work history. YOU have value.
This is mostly really good, but I have a couple minor disagreements.  SoâŚhere are three recommendations from an HR person who reads a shitton of resumes every day:
Move the skills section up to the top! Â You know what I give a fuck about the most when Iâm reading a resume (at least for entry-level positions)? Â WHAT YOU CAN DO. Â I frankly donât give a shit where you learned it. Â Tell me what youâre capable of in concrete terms, organized in a bullet-points list or table that I can quickly scan to see if you even stand a chance of matching what we need, because that is all Iâm doing in those critical first couple of seconds that decides whether I even bother looking at the rest of the resume. Â (Which I get sounds kinda callous but when I have to get through a couple dozen resumes, meaning download, open, read, decide what to do, forward it to the appropriate person if it makes the cut with my comments/summary/recommendations, file it appropriately and go on to the next one, and get back to my other duties and responsibilities - which I donât have enough hours in the day for as it is - I canât afford to depth-read every single resume that hits my inbox.)
Include volunteer experience as work experience if you have any. Â Running the concession stand at a high school club event of some kind counts as cash handling and customer service experience. Â Making blog themes for your friends counts as web design experience. Â Just because you werenât getting paid doesnât mean it wasnât work experience you can potentially leverage to get actual paying work.
Rework that top statement - in its current form itâs looking like some odd hybrid of an executive summary (good!) and an objective statement (bad!), and Iâm not sure how I feel about it tbh.  I think itâs the âleveragingâŚto positively contributeâ bit that is pushing all my âugh no fucking shit sherlockâ buttons.  LikeâŚwhat were you going to say, that you want to skate along doing the bare minimum amount of work and you donât give a shit about the organizationâs goals?  I see way too many regurgitated statements like that - âpositively contributeâ and âmaximize successâ and âutilize my skills to further goalsâ etc. - and they just make my eyes roll out of my head at this point because theyâre so generically corporate.  Iâd rather see a declarative statement about what you are and what you can do, than what you want.
However, huge massive bonus points for putting language fluency right there at the top where I donât have to go hunting for it - language skills are ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS A PLUS and you want to highlight that shit as hard as you can. Â Shove that language fluency in my fucking face, PLEASE. Â Better that than having to scour your work history for mention of translation or anything like that, which I will only do if Iâm A: already liking your qualifications so far, and B: totally fucking desperate for someone who speaks goddamn Spanish already.
Yes fuck me up
PSA: the cashier is not your captive therapist that you can spill your guts to about your man and how he has intimacy issues because he never recovered from that one relationship with the devil woman. They are just a cashier. They have their own problems.
Again, Kimmy asks the important questions.

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That trash can isn't for trash
We have these little tiny trash cans where I work, just big enough to hold the blotter cards that people discard. I totally fine with this. What I am not fine with is the amount of trash that people like to toss in them. Bear with me, it's not just the odd tissue. Today I present you with a carefully curated list of things that I have found in the tiny trash cans that do not belong there. 1. A motherfuckin' diaper. Go big or go home, amirite? I'm starting with the worst find, because people really are that bad. 2. Full cups of coffee. 3. So. Much. Chewed. Gum. 4. Full cups of soda put in upside down so that they are no longer full. 5. Mail. I'm ambivalent on this one, although I would never do it myself. I can't tell you how many times people have torn open our trash bags to find coupons or damaged items. It just seems unsafe to me. 6. Cans of soda. Are you seeing a pattern here? 7. Pizza. 8. Packaging for stuff that may or may not have been stolen. 9. A large tub of partially eaten popcorn from the mall movie theater. 10. My sense of dignity and pride. Ha! Haha! Ha!!!!! I'm just joking, I lost that in my early 20's! Happy shopping, everyone. Please stop using tiny trash cans for large pieces of trash.
Why throw your gum in the trash when you can just stick it on anything laying nearby?
Welcome to Hell
Anyone who has worked more than a couple of months in retail knows how much it blows. This is my venting blog. Feel free to submit your own fails and flails.