why does shizuku have so many cards that are dead wife flashback material lmao
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why does shizuku have so many cards that are dead wife flashback material lmao

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I think if you understand TADC as a deeply personal and direct story centering on transness, emotional/self repression, the inner complexity of cruel people, ego, control, self-destructive tendencies, second chances, and what it means to live a meaningful life, all filtered through the core vision of one person, you'll find a raw expression of all those things, an experience being shared. You'll find a story that is consistent in its theme, subject matter, and quality throughout. Not something impossibly esoteric or flawlessly sophisticated, but a story that puts every piece it needs to into place. A story that completes itself, that says what it needs to and leaves a mark after it does.
Conversely, if you understand TADC as a story to take every single aspect, moment, outcome, and detail totally literally rather than in tandem with the thematic signficance it communicates. Or were looking for a more lore-driven story. Or were hoping for a more rounded exploration of its world and characters, a hollistic dive into the premise it sets up rather than a story barreling towards a specific end goal/a very pointed thematic stance. You're gonna end up disappointed with what you got.
And this is not a moral judgement, I don't think any expectation is at all more correct than another. I actually think my last point is probably even the most fair stance to have. Especially if you don't engage with any secondary material and just look at the show itself, since it doesn't totally establish Jax as a core focus until later in its run. Some storylines do feel very sidelined.
But if you view the show for what it was meant to be rather than what it was expected to be, I personally think it was rather beautiful. Not perfect, not the pinnacle of cinema, but as a trans woman, it was meaningful to me, dearly so. I feel like the standards its being held to aren't totally reasonable. I think it's a story that deserved to be told as it is, I think it's human.
I kinda like the idea of jax becoming a cautionary tale of what happens when you let dysphoria and self hatred eat you alive. I've met so many of him IRL in my own circles. I think people need to hear it. I need more characters who eat themselves alive and actually have to suffer the consequences of not choosing to be better. It's pretty refreshing to see a different and nuanced take on dysphoria and how it doesn't always manifest the way you would expect.
drawing Kanade Yoisaki at 3am

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day 5!
This is one of Ichika’s 4 star cards, The Beginning of Something New!
Do your plants need to be watered? Make sure to check!
One of the things about Path of Thorns (Mizuki5) that really sticks out is how much of its run time is dedicated specifically to showcasing the "normal" N25 banter. This type of moment is exactly the type of thing that Mizuki is afraid of losing, and the event makes this explicitly clear. In the lead-up to the event's release on global servers, there were a considerable number of posts to the effect of "does she know she has only 3 hours left" and well... yes! She does know! Nobody knows this more keenly than Mizuki herself!
Like take this whole conversation.... it charmed me the first time, and even on a reread, it still made me smile. As bite-sized as it is, it's so full of N25-isms. Though both Mizuki and Ena have their upcoming talk hanging over them, they’re both attempting to be as “normal” as possible. Neither Kanade nor Mafuyu have been made privy to Mizuki and Ena’s promise, so they carry on as normal, with Kanade complimenting Ena and Mafuyu bluntly describing Ena's reaction. It really embodies what their regular dynamic is.
So by showing these lighter moments, the game is reminding the reader of what exactly it is that Mizuki is so scared of losing by coming out. Even if Ena and the rest aren't outwardly transphobic towards her, will this dynamic change? Will she be unable to banter and laugh and feel like she belongs? The possibility, however slim, is just too frightening. But she needs to face that fear to move forward.

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Okay but imagine being the team of Eridian scientists tasked with keeping Erid's Only Human alive for as long as possible while the whole planet's environment is literally trying to kill him. And then Rocky shows up and is like:
“Grace says he would like half of dome to be water.”
“Oh, is necessary for humans to have large amounts of water question?”
Small Eridian equivalent of a sigh. “No. Not needed for life. In fact Grace will die if he falls in water and does not get out.”
“Tell him we give him water in containers that won't kill him. Lots lots lots of water on Erid for Grace to drink.”
“No. Grace say he want water on ground. Also want it with excess sodium chloride compound so it will be unhealthy for drink.”
“WHY QUESTION???”
To celebrate Erid getting their sun back on track, Grace asks for some alcohol. There's a small amount left from the Hail Mary and Rocky offers to take it to the science Eridians to see if they can synthesise more.
“Grace want this liquid for celebration.”
“Of course.” They scan it. “You have wrong liquid. This contain compounds which are poisonous for humans.”
“Yes yes yes. Grace say humans like feeling of being slightly poisoned.”
“WHY QUESTION?????”
Grace is like one of those extremely finicky tropical fish who instantly die if not kept in extremely specific conditions.
Only here the fish can talk and keeps asking you to make it vodka.
I plotted out the soundtrack for the remaining chapters, and Chapters 9-12 are locked in to specific character-songs, so Chapter 8 is the only place to fit in Bake no Hana. (I want to fit Bake no Hana to include Mizuki in the 'witches are born from the despair of human teenage girls', which, yay for pride month! perhaps un-yay for the Mizuki in that setting)
It poses a very important challenge. I can fit the song anywhere in the episode; not just a witch fight, but, the emotional core of the episode is Sayaka on the train. The men on the train will be talking that was about Idols and Shizuku specifically and Shiho's breakdown will be about how it disgusts her that Idols save people like that too. Which. Which presents a real big challenge to including Mizuki's song about dysphoria and self-loathing. But! If anybody can find some way to thread the needle it's a transgirl writing during pride month!
Writing this down so I don't forget it.
if the narrative and even Shiho herself seems to dehumanize Mizuki, I need more to balance that out that just the universe itself validating her. Minori specifically, needs to be shown validating her.
Amia is one of Minori's online friends from idol forums since she'd be a big content creator. I imagine Minori helped her with material for a Haruka video once even. but, alternately, that Familiar with the cherry blossoms and the dress it was ashamed to wear, was from Ena's witch and Mizuki's still around for this chapter.
I plotted out the soundtrack for the remaining chapters, and Chapters 9-12 are locked in to specific character-songs, so Chapter 8 is the only place to fit in Bake no Hana. (I want to fit Bake no Hana to include Mizuki in the 'witches are born from the despair of human teenage girls', which, yay for pride month! perhaps un-yay for the Mizuki in that setting)
It poses a very important challenge. I can fit the song anywhere in the episode; not just a witch fight, but, the emotional core of the episode is Sayaka on the train. The men on the train will be talking that was about Idols and Shizuku specifically and Shiho's breakdown will be about how it disgusts her that Idols save people like that too. Which. Which presents a real big challenge to including Mizuki's song about dysphoria and self-loathing. But! If anybody can find some way to thread the needle it's a transgirl writing during pride month!
I think it would be funny to write a murder mystery where not only did every single character involved have an obvious motive to kill this mf, they were actually all attempting to murder him first, but the murder attempts all cancelled each other out all except for one. Two people tried to poison him but the poisons just happen to work as antidotes for each other, and instead of killing him only gave him the shits, and due to having the shits he couldn't go hunting that day like he had planned, foiling the plans of the one who had conditioned his favourite hunting horse to panic and bolt at the cue of a whistle, and the other murder attempt of tampering with his gun so that it would have exploded his whole face off.
The whole mystery isn't about who could have done it or how, but who was the one who got lucky and actually succeeded.
Sherlock Holmes and The Case of Perhaps We'd Best Leave This One Alone, Watson. There Appears To Be An Excess Of Armed Maniacs In The Vicinity.
When I was in high school a friend of mine would host murder mystery dinners once or twice a year. They were the kind you could buy as a kit -- I don't even know if they exist anymore -- and everyone was assigned (or chose) a character, then received a booklet of clues to share. The idea was to spend an evening in a one-shot LARP designed like an Agatha Christie novel.
I was a year above most of them at school so they threw a "goodbye" murder mystery for me just before graduation, and about 2/3 of the way through the game we all realized that everyone had at least attempted to kill the victim. The game then shifted from "whodunnit" to "who succeeded in dunninit" which we all felt was not only super fun but above the usual level of narrative complexity for those games.
After we solved it, we discovered that the game wasn't from a kit -- the host had written it herself and meticulously printed out the booklets in replica style of the kits. It was the best going-away party I think I could possibly have had.
No spoilers, just themes.
With the finale out now I think a central theme that I've recognized and really adore is "all of these characters are more complex than an audience would appreciate." They are all being squished into a child-friendly set of archetypes, be that by Caine, Jax, or metatextually, the fandom. Caine doesn't want them complaining, swearing or having sex, they just have to go on endless, mindless, youtube-monetizable adventures. He's the ringmaster, he puts them in a bright poppy's playtime ass stage and demands for funny to happen. Meanwhile, Jax doesn't want to address the dire reality of their situation and copes by playing along, treating himself and all the characters as flat archetypes with no internality, so that the elephants in the room can safely be ignored. The fandom, meanwhile, is quietly guilty of all the same things. "Why isn't my favorite character acting in accordance with my headcanon? Which characters are flatly evil so we can hate them? Will they achieve my perfect happy ending? Because if not I'll be mad about it."
It doesn't work. Because they're more complex than that. They're people, they need more, they have emotions and traumas and wants and needs. Ragatha isn't always cheerful, she's not just the mom friend, and she's not some manipulator either. She's a person, trying her best, and very often failing. Pomni isn't always anxious, she's a natural leader and she wants the best for everyone, but she's not perfect either. She's a person, trying her best, and very often failing. And Jax isn't just a villain, he's a very complicated ball of traumas whose consistent first instinct is to push everyone away, hurting others so that he won't get hurt himself. He's a person, trying his best, and very often failing. She might even be a girl. Zooble isn't just a grump, Gangle isn't just a wimp, Kinger isn't just crazy. They're humans. And humans aren't always good. They're messy, screwed up, complicated things. They're things that can't be flattened down to archetypes, no matter how much Caine, Jax, or the fandom wants it.
The fandom wanted a bunch of cookie cutter adventures with good guys and bad guys, but what we got is just a bunch of people, stuck together, their traumas rubbing up against eachother until something catches fire and explodes. And I think that's way more interesting. I'm glad the show is that. I understand not everyone feels that way, though. A lot of people wanted something less nuanced. But I don't think the show not matching your expectations is the show's fault. I think people just need to come at it with the right mindset. Meet the story where it's at.
People are always more complicated than an audience wants them to be.

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A knock on the door, saying, “Are you in there, miss?" I stay quiet as can be
I'm not here, I'm where nobody can reach.
wl3 shizu...... ponytail...