"Mischief Managed"

Remus: You did WHAT—

sirius: ‘called it’

james: no

regulus: ‘it must’ve been my fault’

remus: you’re not good enough for your son

walburga: excuse me?

James: a father. Someone happy with a family.

Peter: I don't know... I hope we're all still friends. It would be nice to be more confident... Also maybe work with herbology? Or animals?

Remus: if I get any kind of job it's already a blessing. If we're aiming for unrealistic, I'd like to teach.

Sirius: dead.

Marauders:

Peter: God, waiting in a supply closet for three fucking hours by myself almost drove me insane

Remus: We had, uh, a pretty boring three hours, too…

Peter: *looks at Remus before he looks at Sirius who avoids eye contact*

Peter: No… you guys took it to pound town, didn’t you?

Sirius: Uh-

Peter: Oh my fucking god, you did! You fucks were fucking!

Remus: Hold on-

*James and Regulus walk into view*

James: Ready to go boys?

Peter: Prongs- Oh my fucking god- You too?!

James & Regulus: *visibly disheveled with bites on Regulus' neck*

Peter, pointing between Remus & Sirius and James & Regulus: YOU GUYS WENT TO POUND TOWN. AND I WAS STUCK IN A CLOSET. FOR THREE FUCKING HOURS!

James: Peter-

Disco tampon fights dog with issues over walking crippling anxiety. Crippling anxiety doesn’t like dog with issues, but doesn’t wanna hurt dog with issues. So she hops between the two, but makes it clear, she likes the disco tampon. Crippled anxiety then finds out disco tampon, is in fact, a disco tampon! She’s like “ooh, so pretty! So cool! I wanna date you even more.”

Crippling anxiety meets disco tampon’s family, and expensive girl is like “WE BEST FRIENDS” while her boyfriend, blood constipation, can’t be around her cause he wants to do want tampons do and suck da blood.

Moody booty CanNOT stand crippling anxiety, and wants her to go away. (Same bestie, it’s tiring) Anyway! Moody Booty’s boyfriend, Gorilla Man is a lovable dumbass.

They adoptive parents, Dr. steal yo wife and Ms. I just met you but I claim you as my kid Are loving! Crippling anxiety is a dumbass and follows tracker the tractor and almost become a disco tampon.

Disco tampon family leave crippling anxiety behind and she becomes crippling depression. She almost dies, but expensive girl is like “NO! HELP ME SAVE DISCO TAMPON!”

They then go to ?Italy? and crippling depression saves disco tampon, gets threatened by Rat-man and his premium disco tampons, and becomes crippling anxiety again.

Crippling anxiety leaves dog with issues for disco tampon and they get married. THEN! CRIPPLING ANXIETY GETS HORNY AND CREATES FAKE DOLL BABY!

Crippling anxiety become a disco tampon; dog with issues imprints on doll baby, becomes alpha, and has his baby pack. Rat-man and his team of premium disco tampons wanna kill doll baby cause she a child who don’t age. But the original disco tampons are like “fuck you!”

And they fight, with the help of wannabe werewolves. Blood constipation dies, Dr. Steal yo wife dies, Rat-man and his team of premium disco tampons die, and a bunch of other disco tampons die. Including the wannabe werewolves!

But then it turns out that it was a vision 👀 expensive girl had, which would happen if Rat-man tried to kill doll baby.

Bonus: Crippling anxiety became crippling anger and tried to kill dog with issues because he imprinted on doll baby. She ended up hurting tiny cutie. But tiny cutie was like “it’s ok” and they mended that real quick…

whump community when it’s October

James: hi padfoot have you seen my converse?

Sirius: n-no sorry

James: *opens the closet*

James: shirts, trousers, hi moony!, sweaters, scarves but no converse ☹️

*4 hours later*