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Finally watching Katie the day Kitty left. And her reading the book. I thought maybe I wasn't gonna cry, listened to Katie read the whole thing just fine, read the words "my bravest knight." Immidiate tears. Actual full blown tears and choked up. I can't with his fucking smp, fuck all of you, goddamit.
My KitKats...
I can't cope man. They were each other's biggest inspiration. Most fearsome defenders. Each other's comfort and home and family. They went through the most important times in their life together. They both saw each other knighted. Saw each other strive for and train for and reach their goals. Saw each other grow and learn. They were both each other's most trusted right hand and their noble leader. The way both of them had a chance to be monarch, to lead the other as they have expressed being inspired by and learning from the other. And how both also got to be the knight under the other. Even if Kitty's was very short. Just the way it represents how they supported and guided and protected one another. Both got to be that for the other.
I know they said they'd write and stuff and probably see each other again but I'm not okaayyy
thinking about ser bek and how she is so honest and open and frank. her best trait is that she says whatever is on her mind and she means it. she is a woman of her word and only speaks truth. this is the knight who told the mad king nom to just stop it when he declared war. she knows no fear and knows no guile.
and yet
she fell in love with a woman in the enemy kingdom. she cannot admit this to those around her without casting doubt on her ultimate allegiances. and as the most experienced knight in the red kingdom, she carries the weight of their safety on her back. she cannot afford to be questioned without it fracturing the kingdom.
and yet
she still loves the swan mage so fiercely. she spends every moment she can with her. she reassures her at every opportunity that she will do anything for her. she is endlessly loyal to her love.
I loved tma so much and I'm currently really fixated on bannerfall smp, also I saw someone mentioning this and got the brain worms.
There are a lot of very easy/obvious ones imo, but there's some where I could see many options, also this is just my opinion
For each one I said which Fear Entity they most align with, either off vibes or because of lore and I said whether they would exist as an avatar (think Michael Distortion, Simon Fairchild, Peter Lukas) or as a victim (s4 Martin, Michael Shelly, Sasha). The main difference between those is if they inspire the fear in others to feed or if they themselves truly fear this, sometimes both
Blue Kingdom
Shan - The Vast. She is very aligned with the Sea, the Ocean, the many waves and those lost to them. I could see her as both an avatar and a victim of this entity
Eloise - Also the Vast. Air magic is really well suited for this entity, she would be an avatar
Scott - The Web. This guy has never made a decision for himself ever. He had no control over being sent to Blue Kingdom, was powerless to stop either of his parents from dying and right now is kinda letting himself be puppeted around for the sake of being useful to the only people he's got left. He would be a victim of this entity, but I could totally see him grow into being an avatar
Mae - The Lonely. She is sooooo a victim of this entity, the shadows follow her like the fog, everytime someone leaves or something goes wrong they just creep up
4c - The Buried. I think it works really well with his fear of being trapped in a cell,he could never escape that bounty, he could never excape fate, he would be a victim of this entity. I could see him as a victim of several entities due to what happened in hell, but I think the Buried is the most recurring from his backstory
Nom - The Slaughter. Endless war and violence and bloodshed. The mace itself is the avatar for this one, he's both victim and avatar
Gracie - Either Corruption or Extinction. She would try to fight both of these so hard but they are ultimately her biggest fears, so she feeds them without meaning to. She would be a victim
Owain - The Eye. The spirits know everything and keep a tally of everyone's sins that must be paid for in blood, he does not know everything but he knows that the spirits do, so he chooses to pay the blood price. Also he can't show his face because he "can't bear the thought that other people would see their mistakes". Victim and also maybe avatar (this one I'm not 100% happy with, hes hard to put in a box)
Red Kingdom
Sausage - The End. He's an avatar of Lady Death. I can also see him as an avatar of the web with how he's trying to manipulate his kingdom from the shadows
Cambam - The Stranger. The thing possessing him is an avatar, he's just the cover
Frogue - The Flesh. The inherent body horror of being physically changed without your consent. He was a victim and then got really used to this new him and became an avatar
Kitty - The Flesh. Body horror victim number two, paw would not become an avatar. I can also see them as an avatar of the Hunt, a cat who's very good at catching mice and fish
Cherr - The Desolation. Yes, because of the fire but also, the loss of her kingdom, the way that everything went up in flames so quickly, the fact that she may return to see Soluna in ashes. She would be an avatar like Agnes and also kind of a victim
Apo - The Dark. Without her light (Cherri, Soluna , a purpose) she's just the moon, left in the dark. She would be a victim
Ser Bek - The Stranger. She fears deception from others,that one creaking king message was kinda fucked. Maybe the Lonely, as a victim, she fundamentally needs to be seen and ordered to action, she needs people around to function
Katie - The Spiral. She doubts herself a lot, there were a few moments where she was gaslit, also whatever is going on with the 4c hallucinations, very much madness inducing. I can also see her as a victim of the Hunt, because of Freddy
Side note: Every knight has a somewhat strong connection to the Slaughter, they're literally at War, I only mentioned it for Nom because he embodies it the most
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nom and katie are like. katie, growing up, has been struggling against having her identity reduced to "nom's little sister". she loves her brother and she wants him in her life but she needs to keep a separation from him because shes worked too hard to build an identity outside of him.
meanwhile nom has his whole life built his whole identity around being "katie's big brother" and sees absolutely nothing wrong with that and is now struggling because he feels thats been ripped away from him and is desperately trying to claw back that identity because he cant cope with the hole its left in his life.
and to make it worse - to nom, this subsumption of his entire self into his relationship with his sister is because he loves her... so when katie refuses to do the same, that means she must not love him back. or at least, she doesnt love him as much as he loves her. and katie is trying so hard to meet him in the middle and negotiate a relationship where they can stay in each other's lives without being completely codependent but thats still a rejection to nom, who wants the same level of unhealthy devotion in return.
and thats BEFORE factoring in the war happening! its a horrible no-win situation! people are probably gonna die over it! and it makes me cry!
I love a good "death of innocence" motif in media. A starry-eyed girl who just got knighted, who's absolutely aching to prove herself, to be worthy of this honour she was finally awarded.
bf!Katie as a character who has dreamed for her whole life to be a knight. Who's done everything in her power to reach this dream, left so much behind.
Who heard her brother's question where he put her in the scenario he broke his oath in and decided to make a Brave and Valiant oath.
To serve her monarch to the best of her abilities. To slay her enemies. To protect the innocent.
Two stipulations of her oath that contradict, following either one doesn't break the oath itself , but it sure feels bad. One week after the oath was made too...
bf!Katie who doesn't like to lie, who's dreadful at it, forced to lie to her friend that she knows she's hurt with her actions, who will likely hate her for this.
bf!Katie who's looked up to her brother for her whole life, a perfect knight, a great protector, the strongest person she knows. When faced with a dilemma between his duty and his morals, he chose the right thing.
bf!Katie who doesn't care about his broken oath at all, who still looks up to him so much, who feels like she can definitely never be as good as him now, who feels so much remorse.
bf!Katie who's hands were stained for the first time, with the dye the Prince was holding and it's awfully reminiscent of blood...
Two children died today in Bannerfall Smp, and narratively it's soooo peak
I'm think I love vsmp!Owen so much because his character took everything I knew about story structure and smashed it into bits
okay. context.
in literature, there's basically this concept that what the story is doing is breaking down and rebuilding the character into something new, whether that's for better or for worse. the inciting incident forces them to move, to stop being stagnant, and it goes from there
the narrative of vsmp did that perfectly for owen. it showed him something new and forced him out of his shell (or, well. coffin) it gave him foils and obstacles and painful, painful juxtaposition to show him exactly what he'd become since losing louis
and he. didn't. change.
or rather, the change he did have came about so little, so late, that even if Owen had the capability to grow, he didn't have the time
It wasn't that he had a positive or negative arc, just that he needed more time to be able to change at all and Oakhurst could never give that to him
the real curse of Oakhurst is that all any of them needed was a little bit more time, but that's for another post
Owen's arc wasn't positive or negative, but it was still tragic
Owen had everything set out for him, just like any other protagonist would. but he said no. he chose to live without ever changing or letting go, and in the end the thing he had been fighting for wouldn't have recognised him.
Owen's story is about corruption and guilt and anger, but it hurts so much more because the creators set it up like it a story with hope
they tricked my little obsessed-with-story-structure brain, broke every preconceived notion I had, and managed to make me, the kid who studies story and knows how every movie or book will end by the first chapter, shocked
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The flowers they’re each holding were chosen via cursory google searches, Owen is holding black dahlias for hate and white lilies for loss. Legs is holding marigolds for healing.
These are my thoughts about the finale specifically: I love it, I adore how this ended. I can't help but see the parallels tho. Cleo and Pearl together forever, rebuilding the town, being its Guardians. A sire and her fledgling. A happy couple, taking care of Oakhurst. They are what Louis and Owen could've been. This was most likely what Louis would've wanted when he turned Owen. Oakhurst will flourish under the guidance of a couple of vampires, but so much more blood had to be shed before this conclusion and neither the kind Mayor of Oakhurst nor his devotee get to see it through
One thing I genuinely adore about the life series is the inherent subjectivity of everyone posting their own povs. I don't think any series has been able to showcase that in such a polarising manner since 3rd life.
I mean, in 3rd life depending on the perspective you watched, everyone was both a villain and completely righteous in the whole war they had going on. This season the villies specifically set out to be villains and terrorise people, which is a very interesting narrative to me since afaik no one really ever went into a life series with the goal to be the antagonist before (sl scar and ll joel had circumstances).
The trio did a really good job of antagonising people, even though in their own videos they seemed like little meow meows (which they are, but I love how threatening they seem from other povs). But this episode specifically highlighted the pluriperspectivism of every situation really well: the villies felt alone and targeted, the rejects felt vindicated, the lost gen were feeding on the chaos, the gluten guys whittled down to just impulse, cabincore were scheming but most of all, there were ongoing plots that you can only see in specific videos because *everyone saw things in a unique way*
rereading six of crows at seventeen is such a strange experience. like on one hand i relate to these characters, but on the other they’re out here committing intense crimes and pulling off impossible heists while i’m writing fan fiction in my room and struggling to get through the school year with my sanity intact. like.
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whenever people say that they dont think the crows act like teenagers i have to laugh because. like. as a teenager. they do. they're relatively mature because they're all severely traumatized and had to grow up fast (also because considering the time period it's based on it's completely reasonable for younger kids to be expected to do more) but they still act like teenagers. i've seen a bunch of people mention the "my ghost wont associate with your ghost" convo and "pay someone to pay someone to burn your kruge" but also, Jesper makes multiple sex jokes. Inej purposefully takes the harder route Kaz can't handle so he'll let her go alone. Wylan complains about pretty much everything. Nina spends most of the first book needling and pissing off her ex because she enjoys it. Kaz spends half his energy trying to be mysterious and cool. Matthias calls Kaz a demon for most of the books because he doesn't like him. Kuwei uses the fact that he looks like his crush's crush to kiss his crush. he also pretends he doesn't know Kerch because he didnt want to talk to people.
and, hands down the most teenager scene in the entire duology, Kaz and Jesper get in an argument and start a fucking fist fight. they are literally rolling on the ground punching each other. and everyone just fucking stands there. watching. Wylan wants someone to stop them but no one does. because they're not actively trying to kill each other. so whatever its fine. and then afterwards they're besties again. that is how 99% of the fights at my school go my dude, they are SUCH teenagers.
I've seen a bunch of people do reviews of the book and say they didn't see the characters as teenagers because they behaved like adults. I believe that couldn't be further from the truth. As someone who is around the same age as the characters, I have to say that they act *painfully* seventeen.
I truly love the dialogue in this book because it shows so much of the characters' true personalities. Kaz is the one I've seen most people say they age up in their minds, but even though they he's got his whole persona as Dirtyhands and is the shadow leader of the Dregs and all, he's absolutely still a teenager. He had to attract the attention of a guard during the Hellgate breakout and decided to make a joke about the guy's mom. He's constantly being sarcastic and making witty comments and playing into the jokes.
Yes, of course, there is a certain level of maturity that all of these characters have that you wouldn't normally see in a teenager, all of them are *Traumatised*, severely. The fact that they are extremely self-reliant and lucid is precisely a result of the cruel environments they had to withstand and sometimes even managed to thrive in.
The bantering that can be seen in just about every group dialogue between the crows feels refreshing, it's a moment of reprieve from all the fast-paced and sharp movements of the narrative, it's a laugh that can be had while both the readers and the characters are worrying about the odds of success.
I really love this book and have so many thoughts.
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