flying solo

I’ve built my share of things from the ground up. You askin’ if I will for you?

That is exactly what I’m asking. 

Oh come on, it ain’t that bad. You could always hire someone to install it, or get a friend that knows how to help out. It’s either that or resign yourself to wipin’ off bird shit for the rest of your time in that place.

Not really the type of person to have ‘friends’ around here. What about you. You know how to build things?

The options are to either move again, or build a garage. I’m leaning towards the garage. 

I’m having that same problem. Do the locals feed these birds something weird? I swear, either a handful of birds are just really not having a great time or they travel in flocks with the sole purpose of destroying the paint on cars. Either way, I’m about ready to invest in a scarecrow and see if it works on common birds.

The locals here are weird all on their own, so I have no doubt the birds are next level weird as well. Can’t have one without the other apparently. Please do, and then inform me of your findings. 

I would advise you to invest in one of those tarp car covers, but I feel like that could potentially make your problem even messier.

Messier, and more time consuming in the morning. Two things I’m looking to avoid.

“i feel like my daughter is three going on eighty-five, sometimes. she decided this year that heath bars and werther’s were her favorite candies, and she will not stop asking for them. i don’t - grasp how this happened.”

“Whatever happened to the normal... snickers and hershey bars.”

You know they sell them metal carports you can install on your own, right? I got an extra one a few years back for four wheelers and dirtbikes.

That... sounds like something that has to be put together. With power tools. I’m not built for that. 

“Oh you’re going to regret it even more in the winter, when you’re scraping windshields and cursing the cold.”

“Yes, thank you for that crushing realization.”

“garages are useful as hell - even though half of mine is covered in random bullshit at the moment. - they have those car covers you can get, though. those things are pretty good.”

“While that is true, my car would still be cold when I get in in the morning. My best bet would just be... build a garage.”

You could always  get one of the popup tarp garages. they’re only like a couple hundred bucks, and it would save you on leaves and bird poo

That just seems like more work than just paying someone to build a garage. Wouldn’t the pop up tarp need to be cleaned reguarly?