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“Gary, I realize it’s your first day, but we do have a dress code.”

I literally can’t tell who is talking to who, and I don’t want to change that for a second.

If you need me I’ll be in the bath watching lava on my television

“sigh…. this extremely hot water will have to do”

Marjorie & C. H. B.Quennell, Everyday Things in Archaic Greece (London: B. T. Batsford, 1931).

Wait, wait…. Is that seriously it? How their clothes go?

that genuinely is it

yeah hey whats up bout to put some fucking giant sheets on my body

lets bring back sheetwares

trust the ancients to make a fashion statement out of straight cloth and nothing but pins

Wrap Yourself In Blankets, Call It a Day

That last one looks dope

Squares and rectangles: easy to weave!! No cutting means no hemming.

And easy to construct, you don’t have to have complicated seaming and patterning to turn fabric into clothing!

the second radish is 29 feet away

this is legitimately the funniest post on this site

ten years later still get shook

My ringing just went away for the first time in years. What is this blissful quiet.

wait wait i gotta try this, i don’t think i’ve had Actual Silence since i was like 5

HOW THE FUCK

Reblogging to save a life, and also because, even if you don’t have tinnitus, this is totally worth trying if you like new sensory experiences.  

ok so there’s a game me and my friends play called “don’t get me started” and basically someone gives another person a random topic and they have to go on an angry rant about it and it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to us at parties and car rides so I highly recommend playing sometimes with your friends

I love this idea. We used to do things like this in Improv.

Related game: “THINK ABOUT IT.” You’re given a random topic, and your job is to build it into an epic conspiracy theory, the crazier the better. You end your rant with a serious face and the command that your listeners “Think about it.” 

Another related game: Illuninati. Similar to Think About It except you are given 2 completely different topics and you have to connect them to each other in a wild conspiracy rant

Rb to safe an awkward hang out

me and my friends play “World’s Greatest Expert” where one of the other players says “Hey, I heard you’re the world’s greatest expert on ____” and you have to give an in depth (and probably completely false) lecture about the thing you’re the greatest expert on. Other players are allowed to ask you questions.

The version I learned was ‘Ah Yes’ in which someone gives you a work of art or famous landmark and you go “Ah Yes, the ____” in a posh accent while making up the most wildly inaccurate history of the topic. Bonus points for how hard everyone laughs.