i've been here for so long...

atheist quarterback throws a hail darwin

agnostic quarterback throws a hail maybe

You can't just nerf him without admitting that he was too powerful in his original form

My dad used to design kitchens at Lowe’s and one day he got a dude from one of the national labs looking to buy a countertop. Dad sent him home with a sample of a quartz-composite countertop to make sure the color will look good with his existing cabinets. The dude asks my dad what the composition of the countertop is and whether it’ll melt if he puts a pot on it (since it’s a composite and not pure stone) and Dad gives him some rough numbers and reassures him that it won’t melt if he puts a hot pan on the counter. The dude comes back with week later without the sample. The dude gives dad a detailed list of the countertops composition, to the nearest hundredth of a percentile, and the exact temperature it melts at, because he took it to his lab and melted it down. tldr, it’s not just firefighters.

Imagine giving someone a sample of the granite you use to make countertops and they come back a few days later just to tell you they fucking dematerialized it

Ok, but this is just, like, what people do if they have access to equipment. We just… put shit in it. Just to see. At this point, I’ll try and hit just about anything with an arc, just to see. I’ll sand and polish anything you’ll let me, if I’m bored enough. If I had a machine that could melt something down and tell me exactly what was in it? I’d be just waiting for parts of my world to become “trash” so I could de-materialize it and turn it into knowledge of what it was.

YES OMG BRÜNNHILDE

official library post

Trace amounts of Monica in my life

A statistically insignificant level of Monica in my life

My life manufactured in a facility that also processes Monica

#mambo number 0.0000000000005

this is the one meme that manages to age like a fine wine

[Image: Five electrical outlet enhancers accompanied by two remotes; each of the remotes has ten buttons: Two for each outlet (one on, one off).]

Cannot express enough my love for these. My entire apartment is on five circuits, controlled by two duplicate remotes. I can turn off the living room lights from my bed, if I forget, without getting up. And no apps needing so nothing to hack or spy on you.

The way everyone just paused before just putting more tofu on XD

Pokemon Heritage Post

I really love when cats use their front legs to hold something in place while they use their back legs to kick the absolute shit out of it

They say there are other worlds out there beyond the stone sea, but I think that's stupid nonsense.

guys. i really like you. it's nice to be on this dashboard together

depressed at 11 was crazy i should have become a child prodigy

keep your head up, fellow wizard! it’s incantation, not incanttation!

wait

hold on

wait