I honestly don't know

* body language masterlist

* a translator that doesn’t eat ass like google translate does

* a reverse dictionary for when ur brain freezes

* 550 words to say instead of fuckin said

* 638 character traits for when ur brain freezes again

* some more body language help

Okay, so Ivan the Terrible’s youngest son, Dmitry, was assassinated in 1591 at the age of 8. Fast-forward nine years, and there’s a guy going about Eastern Europe claiming that he is Dmitry, having secretly escaped the assassination attempt and lived in hiding under a false identity ever since. This sort of business isn’t too unusual, but this guy actually pulls it off, managing to gain the Russian throne and rule for nearly eleven months before being dragged from the palace and publicly executed in early 1606. He’d subsequently go down in history as False Dmitry I.

Here’s where it gets interesting. In mid 1607, a second impostor declares himself. Bizarrely, this one doesn’t dispute the first impostor’s legitimacy; instead, he claims to be the same guy, having miraculously survived his apparent execution the year before. He somehow wins the political support of False Dmitry I’s widow, and with her vouching for his identity, he gains the allegiance of the Cossacks, rallies an army over 100 000 strong, and tries to “take back” the throne. Though his march on Moscow ultimately failed, he successfully conquered most of Southeastern Russia, which he would rule until his untimely death in December of 1610, when he was beheaded in a drunken altercation with a Tartar prince. The history books know him as False Dmitry II.

Now jump ahead three months to March of 1611, when a third fucking impostor pops up. Dude apparently just magically appeared from behind a waterfall in goddamn Ivangorod and declared himself Tsar. Following the lead of False Dmitry II, he doesn’t dispute either of the two previous impostors, instead claiming some sort of spiritual reincarnation and/or magical resurrection – it’s not entirely clear which – to establish himself as the same guy. He must have talked a good game, because he managed to win the support of the same fucking Cossacks who supported False Dmitry II’s claim. Unfortunately, he was a far less able commander, being forced to flee his stronghold only a year later, whereupon he was spirited away to Moscow and secretly executed. Though he never managed to actually rule anything, historians decided to stick to the theme and dubbed him False Dmitry III.

all the women that had to grown up being super self-aware of what they wear, what they think, what they say, how they act, where they are, with whom, etc in every aspect of their life, all the time, in this sexist society (especially women of color, non-straight women and trans women): good. finally you all have to learn how to behave.  

“It tickles!” Keith laughs as he tries to shrugs his immortal lover off, but barely moves an inch.

He hums in amusement and continues to sniff Keith’s neck with his nose.

“So sensitive. I like it.” He grins and gives a quick kiss. “Have I said how wonderful your scent is?”

“Many times, you nerd.”

“Just making sure you know.”

The tip of his tongue peaked out and taps against the smooth neckline. His grin went wide when rewarded with a lovely gasp of his human lover. He nibbles on soft flesh.

“Ah~” He sighs playfully. “I just want to nibble you up and get drunk by your blood.”

Keith squirms in James’ firm embrace. His arms wraps Keith’s slim waist from behind and rests his chin on his shoulder. “But you’re supposed to help me with making dinner.”

“Why can’t I have my dessert now?”

“James.” He puffs his cheeks up and pointed the knife’s tip at him. “You promise.”

“I know.” He responds playfully. “Just let me stay like this a little longer. I promise to help you.”

“Fine.” Keith goes back cutting the pineapple for the curry. “It’s not like we don’t cuddle enough.”

James closes his eyes and hums softly.

“True, but simple moments like this makes me feel like I am alive again.”

Keith finishes his chopping, carefully scoops up the chunks into his hand, and dumps inside the pot. He covers the simmering pot with a lid.

There was nothing much to do except for waiting for curry to simmer longer, Keith places his arms over his lover’s and slightly tilts his head until his cheek touches him.

They stood in silence.

James carefully turns him around while stepping back a bit and pulls him back into his arms. He tucks Keith in underneath his chin.

“Keith, I lo—“

The doorbell rings. James groans while Keith chuckles.

“I swear, Shiro has impeccable timing to dampen the mood.”

“Stop blaming Shiro.” Keith smiles as he looks up. “You just suck at it.”

James raises a brow, but a mischievous grin appears as he lowers to Keith’s ear. He whispers with a sprinkle of lust.

“Do not, but I do suck on a certain someone’s blood who has the softest flesh and gorgeous body in my arms.”

Keith’s cheeks flushes in bright red. He playfully punches him on the chest.

Doorbell rings again.

“We have to get the door, James.”

“Fine.” His fingers places underneath Keith’s chin and tilts up his face. His eyes flickers in red then back to hazel. “But I will have my special dessert after dinner.”

“Of course. As long as you behave like a gentleman.”

James gasps with faux pain of such accusation. Keith giggles as he gives him a peck on his cheek and slips out of his loosen embrace to open the door.

He can hear them from the kitchen.

If there is one great thing about being a vampire beside being eternally young, it’s the ability to tease his lover without ever touching him.

I’ll prove it–>>

Sheith:

Do you remember we said, “Hello”

And you asked me about my Levi’s T-shirt

Said, “You are a friend of mine”

My, oh my

You must have saved me ‘bout a thousand times

I wouldn’t be the one I am today

If you hadn’t been a friend of mine

Jeith:

I haven’t seen around since high school

How you doing, do you still remember me?

Are you still a friend of mine?

Now I see

Why I get nervous when you look at me

It’s like your eyes are trying to tell me something

That you’re more than just a friend of mine

Pairings: Jeith/Jaith (James Griffin and Keith Kogane)

Day one of @jamesandkeith week: Competition/Co-operation/Confessions  

Notes: While brainstorming this fic, I realized that normally it’s James who confesses his feelings, so I decided to put my own personal spin on the confession trope. I hope you all enjoy!

Day One / Day Two / Day Three / Day Four / Day Five / Day Six / Day Seven / Day Eight

Ratings/Warnings: fluff, angst, somewhat sweet ending

Read it on Ao3 as well!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pairings: Jeith/Jaith (James Griffin and Keith Kogane)

Day one of @jamesandkeith week: Competition/Co-operation/Confessions  

Notes: While brainstorming this fic, I realized that normally it’s James who confesses his feelings, so I decided to put my own personal spin on the confession trope. I hope you all enjoy!

Day One / Day Two / Day Three / Day Four / Day Five / Day Six / Day Seven / Day Eight

Ratings/Warnings: fluff, angst, somewhat sweet ending

Read it on Ao3 as well!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~