Untitled

i hate that im sensitive and jealous and stupid and quiet and ugly and annoying 

ever wondered what the exact spot you’re sitting in looked like 10,000 years ago

not until nOW AND IM TRIPPIN BALLS

NOPE BYE

HOLY SWEET JESUS YOU CAN HEAR THE CRIES OF THE PITIFUL SOULS FROM HELL

DON’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YOU!

why are 13 year olds these days constantly drinking, smoking weed and having sex?? when i was 13 i had a stable job, a loving wife, 3 good kids, and some savings put away for my retirement. i worry about the younger generation sometimes smh

excuse me as i ruin something in my head before it has a chance to happen

do u ever have a thought that’s so fuckin inappropriate that u feel like dumping a bucket of water on urself like. calm down, self. tone it down. think about jesus

at work last week i was ringing up this guys order and when he signed i was trying to read his signature and i was like “is your last name Duck?” and he got really nervous and he was like “oh nobodys ever uhh noticed before…. i signed it as donald duck i always sign as donald duck im sorry”

why iphones gotta take two million years to turn back on after they die like you plug em in and you’re all ready to start texting again but they’re like “nope. i gotta take some time for myself. figure out who i am. you hurt me too much the last time. let me think.”

do you ever realize that there was a moment when your mom or dad put you down as a baby and never picked you up again

Wtf

this fucked me up

Look at all those ducks there are at least ten

Well, you’re not wrong.

please do not be mean to dogs they are only trying to help

liking 2,197 facebook pages in 2008 is my biggest regret

FRENCH KISS