cholecystectomy sucks. 0/10 would not recommend

Kiana Khansmith
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I'd rather be in outer space πΈ

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@death-limes
cholecystectomy sucks. 0/10 would not recommend

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cis lesbians be like: yes, trans men can be lesbians because they have a special afab girly girl female connection to womanhood. and βtranswomenβ can be lesbians because anyone can be anything i guess. i am a respected ally of the trans community.
People that are TME have started tagging my post about v-coding as just "lgbtqia", as if this is a general queer issue...
Just some very literal "all lives matter" bullshit.
This isn't done to gay men, or cis lesbians, or TME bisexual people, it's not even done to transmasculine people. It is done exclusively to trans women and transfeminine non-binary people. We are being legally sex-trafficked by yhe government within the men's prison system. And this has been happening for generations!
This is not something that "effects all queer people." The only way it effects TME queer people is by making them a little sad when they have to read about it. We, trans women and transfeminine non-binary people, are the ones being fucking legally sex-trafficked by the state.
So you call this what it is, transmisogyny, or you get the fuck away from me and my posts about it.
Talking to men is fucking unbearable no matter what the fuck you do or say they do not care or listen they do not give a shit about women it's so fucking exhausting just to live around men every interaction is a reminder that you do not matter one bit in their eyes I'm so fucking tired of men
reblog if you like to see your own characters tortured
@pangur-and-grim this feels like you as well

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currently thinking abt how saying "i hate women including trans women" is β¨trans inclusive misogynyβ¨ and is expected to be gender affirming while "i hate men including trans men" is somehow both misgendering and offensive
yupppppppppp!
play scarlet hollow
This is such a nice review yaaayyy
It's 25% off btw :]
βgetting thicker skinβ is great in theory but I think for some people βget better at handling your thin skinβ is gonna be way more helpful advice. I have strong emotional reactions to criticism and they might never go away, but i can continue to try and handle each situation maturely and thatβs the important part. Sometimes irrational feelings are chronic and living with them is better than trying to beat yourself up into not having them.
This is great advice because it still recognizes that "handle the situation maturely" still needs to be the endgame.
that one ask arguing against TMA/TME is so much. in addition to what's already been pointed out, i just don't ever see the same push back against other terms.
like anon is basically saying something akin to "people just talking about their own experiences are being called able bodied." like yes, sometimes it is in fact very relevant to point out that someone's experiences are informed by the privileges they have access to! like if a neurodivergent person is speaking about their experiences but they have a clear blind spot when it comes to the privilege they experience as an able bodied person.
that and i can't help but notice, "yet they are often used regardless for transmasc, non-binary and intersex people speaking about their individual experiences" carries the implication that all nonbinary and intersex people are TME. like i wonder why TME is the default for these groups, why TMA nonbinary and intersex people are largely made invisible. if only there were words for those categories; that would be so useful in identifying that and talking about it
βΌοΈβΌοΈβΌοΈβΌοΈβΌοΈβΌοΈ
The perception that intersex & nonbinary people are only ever TME has done insane amounts of damage to the transfems in the intersex & nonbinary communities as a TMA intersex-intergender transfem myself.
I've spoken on this before, but it actually feels like a very coordinated effort particularly where it concerns intersex people. Our community is much smaller. TME intersex people (especially the men) in our community are often violently misogynistic & go to great lengths to use their identity to silence us and pretend we don't exist and it has gotten to a point where i have experienced distrust from perisex transfems based on my intersex status, because these men have SUCCEEDED in making it seem as if every intersex person (or every outspoken intersex rights activist) is TME. They steal our voices and suffocate us all while claiming to experience what we do. It's very coordinated and i'm begging perisex people to recognize this. You cannot let them keep twisting transfeminism as anti-intersex, it actively endangers & silences transfem intersex people. PLEASE correct people on this when you see it. I am begging you.
I've spoken to intersex trans women and most of them have expressed a similar sentiment. the anxiety that they don't "count" as trans women due to being intersex. I was told about a remark from a transmasc that went something like "well, you don't *have* to be transfem if you're intersex" as though percieved distance from transfemeninity should be considered a perk of being intersex. it almost feels like they're saying "why would you *want* to be transfem lol"
TME trans and nonbinary people really *do not* want intersex people to identify with transfemininity(the same is also true for nonbinary transfems, regardless of perisex/intersex status but definietely more pronounced when they're intersex) . otherwise intersex people couldn't be used as a rethorical bludgeon against transfemenism.
I was part of a discord server that said held a lot of queer people and we had a channel where we talked about serious stuff we've experienced.
I start talking about how I feel so drained whenever people call me an "mtf" or an "amab" because it's so draining to hear people never let go of who I used to be. I just wanted to hear that I'm a girl for once.
A lot of them didn't get it. They got confused and said "wait, amab/afab and mtf/ftm is bad now?????"
I tried explaining that I didn't like agab in general because it's as if people can't let go of the fact that I was "born with a man". I told them that I was also ready for that reaction because usually TME's didn't get it.
As soon as I even UTTERED the words TME I got accused of being a transandrophobe and that I shouldn't be infighting and got kicked out :/
ππππππ

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if it's so unethical to want to avoid giving birth to an unhealthy baby why should women avoid drugs and alcohol during pregnancy
what it all comes down to is the belief that pregnancy is god's will, that babies are gods creations, and women's bodies are just the vessels he uses to make life. it's the belief that pregnancy is passive. anything the woman does to actively interfere with god's plan is her playing god and acting above her station.
but we know this is bullshit, that women's bodies make unconscious decisions regarding pregnancy, from conception to miscarriage, prioritizing her welfare above all else. if binge drinking during pregnancy is an active choice that creates a disabled child, materially so is continuing a pregnancy that you know will create a disabled child. there is no difference in outcome for the child who has to deal with the lifelong disability. and there's no material difference between miscarriage and abortion, either, except that one is a conscious choice. fundamentally, what people are uncomfortable with is women defying what they see as divine authority by exerting her own will over creation. but she's the only god in this scenario, because nobody's getting created without her.
i promised myself i'd do a bunch of stuff for myself as a birthday gift and i! did! none of it!! and instead i had a big ibs episode!! yayayayyyy!
anyway i'm 31 now
something that i find interesting about independent animation nowadays is that if you don't have studio/streamer backing, you have to release your work yourself on the internet, but you have to do it for free on the internet because virtually nobody is going to be willing to accept a paywall just for one original show, so what you have to do in order to make any money off of it is make all of your money from merchandising, but then this means that you show must be merchandisable and have very toyetic character designs that translate easily to plushies and whatnot, but then you also need to cater your show to people who are disproportionately inclined to buy merchandise like that in the first place so that your sales can be enough to sustain you, which means that even if you want to communicate complex or difficult ideas in your work, your independent animation project must attract (at least on a first impression) and retain viewers who are both very consumerist and very capable of rabid passion, which unfortunately has a single-circle shaped venn diagram with a lot of the most toxic fandom tendencies known to man, and this explains a lot of things about independent animation and its fandoms nowadays I think
trans woman i am friends with was ejected from a "queer" discord server we were both in because she started talking about how jax was taken less seriously as being transfem as even completely discounted but fandom implied transmasc characters, used sources when a trans boy asked for them, but the boy had a "feeling" she was wrong, cited no sources, and then called her out for using "girls" like people use "guys", and got the server admin to call her transphobic mid kicking her from the server while saying when guys is used its "not even that big a deal"
I'm so normal I'm not mad at all I've never been mad in my life
TMEs when you say their favourite character, Trannella Dickgirlington from their favourite media Sissies are Pedophiles, makes you uncomfortable:
"Errrrrm, it's actually super progressive for the time and is totally valid to some transfem identities. You really need to grow a spine and get more educated. And besides, it's not even a trans woman. It's more an allusion to the cultural concept of [slur][slur][slur] so it can't really be considered transphobic"
TMEs when there's a genuinely grounded, empathetic and universally loved transfem character:
"Um, yikes? Problematic medias much? This is soooo harmful to the trans community. Just riddled with stereotypes, really. No trans woman actually does this, and even if they do it's too small to matter. What? You don't think that's not true at all? Heh, you clearly don't know any better. Go do some reading. I see this for how awful it truly is, you silly girls just don't get it yet"

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almost entirely unprompted, a cis person on reddit accurately explained how most people see trans women as at least slightly subhuman. instances like that always make me feel ten million times better than any kind of deliberate attempt at "validation", like.
fuck man, yeah, thank you for saying that. everyone hates it when I say that, they get mad at me, but you just understand it without me having to say it. and you said it for me, so I don't even have to be the one everyone hates for saying it. I feel so protected.
the "gangle should KILL jax for abusing her" + "jax (accidentally) (possibly) KILLED her (abusive) mother >:(" cognitive dissonance is interesting. is it not abuse when it happens to a trans woman?
the jax defense spores are spreading throughout my body I'm sorry
me: "I mean it's just fiction it's not real it doesn't matter all that much"
tmes: *treating the transfem character exactly as transmisogynistically as they treat real trans women*
me: ,,,,,,,,,,, :)
I know it's a fictional trans woman but oh lord does a chill run up my spine getting people talking about her like this in my notifs...!
demonizing her for committing suicide. degendering her after her death. it's almost like a real life trans woman committed suicide, the reaction is just that lifelike π