lavender ribbons of rain

The last of the classically trained tumblrinas

why the FUCK is there a big spider on my bedroom wall it doesn't look like any spider i've ever seen in my entire life what the fuck

are you sure it's a spider?

oh that's a wolf spider. they taste like celery and pork and they aren't poisonous.

why is it in my room

and why do you know what it tastes like

@sicklythiasus why do you know what a wolf spider tastes like

nom nom.

what

yummy yummy in my tummy tummy

when and why did you eat a wolf spider

why was your solution to eat them

i mean, no one else was gonna.

how to stop biting the skin off your fingers every time your hands are free easy tutorial

feels good as fuck to know no matter how dire it gets there’s another bitch with a blog going through the same god damn thing almost word for word somehow

the world's first kiss happened at some point

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

“bend over” “bend what? over”

I hate this place

another glorious day of not joining an imperialist military and not invading someone else's home and not getting shot in the head by a guerilla resistance fighter :3 god this is literally sooooo easy if u aren't a bitch

"i didn't want to work at mcdonalds" shit dude me neither but i'm not about to bomb someone's house over it yk?

"they lied to me" wat did u think all the guns were for bro?

"i wanted to serve my country" u wanted a dodge challenger and priority boarding and u were ready to kill strangers for it. and now ur dead

I hate to break it to you all, but the military is the closest thing that a lot of countries have to socialism - for a lot of people it is in fact a way out of their living situation. You also need to learn that the majority of military jobs are not combat roles, they're support roles. Stop fighting individuals and start fighting the government that wants to strip people of rights and options so it can force them into an institution that will ship them off to fight in a war they didn't start.

everyone in my notes competing for the worst take possible please pack it up, you're not beating "the US military is socialist"

omg the new emoji 🫪🫪🫪🫪