why I left @bisappho
short version: I realized I’m a lesbian and in addition to that, the blog wasn’t a good fit for me.
long version: buckle up, because I have a lot of things to say and I’ve stayed quiet about this for almost two years now.
when I first joined the blog, it had a little less than 9,000 followers. I became a mod through @butchthalia, a friend I met and got to know fairly well online. she told me it would be the three of us–her, me, and one other mod. she also said I would have to go through a trial period to see if the chemistry between us worked well. (hint: it didn’t.)
since I don’t know if the other mod is comfortable with me sharing their main blog, I’m going to refer to the other mods as mod Luna (@butchthalia) and mod Celestia (the other mod).
things were okay for the first couple days. I reblogged a post here, queued a post there, reblogged already answered asks with extra advice. but then I got promoted to an admin, and the situation rapidly got worse. I started to notice several things that were off:
when I reblogged a post, it would show up on the blog for five minutes to half an hour. but the next time I refreshed the notes page, it was gone.
all the posts I queued would mysteriously disappear from the ‘queue’ tab before they could be posted.
any original post I made either a) got no notes (I later realized this was because they had been made private) or b) were deleted by the next day.
and finally:
whenever I answered an ask, it would almost immediately be deleted from the blog. also, the askbox was never open, and when I tried to open it, I would refresh the page eagerly looking for new asks, only to find it closed again.
now, at first I thought these were just glitches. I checked my computer for viruses, new browser updates, and re-downloaded the app on my phone just for good measure. but about a week into modding the blog, I realized the technology wasn’t at fault–someone was actively sabotaging my attempts to act as a mod for the blog.
for a while, I didn’t trust Luna or Celestia, and acted normally, though I did check their main blogs every so often to see if either one of them was gullible enough to post something dissing me or gloating about their sabotage of my efforts. that didn’t happen, of course. in fact, it never really clicked until the day I was asked to leave the blog.
Luna told me that Celestia had filed a complaint with her, saying I didn’t know or understand anything about how to run such an important active blog, as evidenced by my inability to successfully reblog and queue posts, as well as answer asks quickly and efficiently (much less at all). Luna had agreed with her, so what else could I do? I left the blog, tail between my legs, and tried not to be bitter about it. I tried so hard not to be bitter, because I thought everything was over.
I couldn’t have been more wrong.
five days after leaving bisappho, I got a little nostalgic and decided to reminisce on the good times I’d had with my fellow mods. but after scrolling for a solid ten minutes, I couldn’t find a single post I had reblogged, and my mod introduction as well as notice of departure were both gone. it was like I had never existed.
I never found out why Celestia hated me so much. to this day, I still don’t know why she went to so much effort to get rid of me. maybe she wanted the blog for herself. maybe she really just didn’t feel safe around me. I don’t know, because she had me blocked by the time I was kicked out.
I can’t show you any proof that this happened. hell, sometimes I wonder if that’s really what happened myself. but after talking to @disasterbisexual, who was a mod on there for about two weeks or so, I realized the exact same thing had been happening to every single mod that wasn’t Luna or Celestia. the only difference between the original mods is that Celestia was the one who complained, and refused to interact with us directly.
you don’t have to stop following bisappho. you don’t have to send anons demanding her to tell the truth, or drawing attention to this matter. but I think people need to know that Celestia is not a good person, and if you make yourself vulnerable to her by asking for advice, you need to know what you’re getting yourself into.
