all engines 𝑹𝑼𝑵𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮 .

conrad fisher + smoking

 ❛❛ YOU were sent down here just to give me a headache, weren't you ? ❜❜ clarke regarded apollo with a playful sigh. fingertips rubbed at her temples to justify her statement and she flashed him a knowing look, as if daring him to challenge her.

apollo stopped dead in his tracks,  slowly turning to look at the blonde,  uncertainty written across his features.    carefully deciphering the intent of her comment,  a shake of his head dismissed it altogether.    “  i no more see myself as another noble citizen,  just trying to do what’s best.  ”    he paused,  clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth.    “  for all of us.  ”    his tone,  carried with it,  an obvious undertone.    subtle scowl glared in her direction.

his grasp keeps apollo close, matching the passion and fervor with a like of his own. the feelings that burned for years were now set free like wildfire. for a moment they manage to stay in place, limbs holding the other close as if their lives depended on it. but it couldn't last for too long, with the power behind both of their bodies forcing them back to where they'd been; toppling over without a second thought. it's only once the air in the room has almost vanished completely that luca pulls away, hovering above apollo as he'd wished for. like the sun, the central point of orbit. the red tint to his lips causes a laugh. the savagery was startling. "you're an idiot for not knowing, but i love you." the words hung there, waiting for more. "you know that, right? whatever happens here, that'll always be true."

they’d always shared their warmth with each other.    birthed warmth into the coldest of places,  just so they might live better off having done so.    the warmth they shared here,  the closeness?   it’s unmatched.    peace had done its best to avoid him,  it’s a rarity he can find its good grace.    but from where he lay,    head in green grass,  luca captured in the most poetic silhouette brought forth by piercing sunlight.     it all worked.    they fit together,  perfectly,  the missing pieces of the puzzle which had finally found each other alas.    “  oh,  shutup.  ”    he reached up to pinch the bridge of the blonde’s nose,  playfully rolling his eyes.    “  i love you too.  ”    a sharp inhale pondered on his words.    he’d never said it with such intent,  this way,  it’s different.    it’s better.    “  let’s never do that waiting thing again,  okay?  i hated that.  ”

"jeez, dad," cassie all but snarls as she watches him snatch the bottle from her grasp, brows furrowing as she looks at him with a scorned expression within her features. she's exhausted, evidence of a poor sleep littered across her countenance, namely the dark bags beneath her gaze. but she doesn't care, doesn't care that pike stripped her from her position as a guard, doesn't care that her mother is gone; she can't let herself care. she works her jaw as she stands up, moving towards him to reach for her drink once more. "c'mon, don't do this. don't pretend that you give a shit now."

a palm planted itself firmly into her shoulder, knocking her back towards the bed once more.    apollo almost felt bad for her,  the shriveled state he’d found her in.    he knew things hadn’t been easy,  but hadn’t anticipated they’d be this bad.    “  i didn’t,  really.  ”    he reassured with a gentle scoff,  pondering over to the sink and turning the bottle upsides down.    ensuring she could see him pour the liquor out.    “  that was before i knew your grand plan was to drink your sorrows away,  come on now.  ”    his tone is harsher than intended,  as per usual.    but carries with it,  the fact that he did care.    she’d been a strong beam of resilience created in the face of her mother.    that image,  she’d always held up to the best of her ability.    now,  she’s a mere shadow of herself.    “  it’s eating you alive,  isn’t it?  ”    he inhaled deeply,  the feeling was all too familiar.    “  all of it,  all at once.  ”

THE HUNDRED: S01EP05. @alphastationed

"apollo," she grits out through clenched teeth, a warning; wanting to continue with you don't know what you are talking about. she moves around him, their shoulders tapping one another, as she slides on her mother's guard jacket. "someone has to look out for our people," she murmurs, taking his comment in stride as she does, in fact, look at herself in the mirror and fix her hair so that it is out of her face. "not my fault that you decided to give up on that."

＂  guess who took care of our people while you were fuckin’ destroying families on the ark.  ＂    the truth of his statement,  had been blurred.    he hadn’t gotten the full story yet,  but that didn’t matter.    his intent is to char the sense of pride she’d traveled with to ash.    ＂  where were you when they kidnapped us—  ＂    emotions crumble,  cave in.    his bottom lip quivered,  trauma pulsed through constricted veins.    ＂  where the fuck were you when they drilled into us,  huh?  ＂    now,  a finger prodded at the jacket,  smudging it with his dirt stained fingertip.    ＂  we didn’t have a choice up there.  ”    cerulean irises scrutinize her.     “  down here,  you don’t have to be this.    and i know you.    you’re not proud of the shit we’ve done.    so what are you hanging onto?  ＂    a half-step carried him forwards,  closing the distance between them.    forcing her to face her demons.    ＂  is it this?  huh?  this fuckin’  piece of fabric?  ＂    he pinched the shoulder with an audible scoff.   

“eeeasy. i didn’t say that.” hands slightly lift up defensively letting them fall by his sides whilst facing the guard. “but if anything went missing, wouldn’t you be responsible?” if someone else is willing to take the blame, he definitely wasn’t opposed to it. silas folds his arms over his chest and tilts his head slightly. scrutinizing eyes settle on apollo before narrowing some. “frankly, i don’t think you’re capable—but hey, you shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover.” in spite of being nearly caught red-handed, he still found the nerve to take a jab. the many valuable items he’s stolen so far lay hidden in a place no one will ever find. he’s confident in his skill, maybe a little too much. “i don’t see the point of playing detective, do you?” he keeps a collected demeanor before looking at the mess he made then at apollo, “it must’ve been someone snooping around. there, mystery solved.” 

eyes  watched  as  apollo  shifted  through  different  items,     her  own  fingers  holding  a  piece  of  metal  from  a  project  as  she  waited  for  him  to  reply.     raven  didn't  push.     she  could  easily  see  how  worked  up  he  was  and  well,     she  wasn't  stupid.     sure,     she  was  sarcastic  and  sometimes  liked  pushing  people's  buttons  but  the  brunette  knew  when  not  to.     ❛  just  working  on  some  stuff.     i  needed  a  break  from  the  chaos.  ❜     there  was  so  much  going  on  as  they  tried  to  figure  out  their  roles     -     including  leadership.     raven  wanted  nothing  to  do  with  the  battles  of  who  had  the  bigger  dick.     ❛  feel  free  to  hang  out  or  whatever.     i  won't  pry.  ❜

for as irritated as he’d been,  her lack of apprehension is a breath of fresh air.    upon finding the spare part,  he finally withdrew from the stack of scraps he’d been searching.    turning to view the brunette,  beaming with curiosity.    ＂  yeah,  everyone’s just so fuckin’ exhausting,  you know what i mean?  ＂    even now,  he’d found himself teetering on edge.    civilized conversation had grown increasingly rare.    ＂  are you sure that’s supposed to go there?  ＂    truth be told,  apollo wouldn’t have known any better.    especially not when it came to mechanics,  there’s a teasing nature to his tone.    ＂  i’m not an expert,  but my name is apollo.    so i gotta have some type of knowledge on this shit,  afterall.  ＂  

hands run over his face, fighting the urge to laugh, knowing that what might spill from his lips could send them in the opposite direction if he wasn't careful. "i've been your shadow for years. everywhere you went, i tried to go. everything you did, i wanted to be a part of it." so how could apollo not see what that meant? was it his own baggage, because of the father who didn't deserve him in the first place? oh how luca tried to be that replacement. to be the boost to his ego, the friend always at his side, whatever comfort he needed. "that wasn't just because i was lonely or because you were my friend. it was because of you. who you are and what you mean to me." being loved by apollo was like standing in the sun, luca now knew. that sensation was real to him. the warmth, the glow, it made every day better. "i would never say no. not to you. not then," he paused mid-step, wishing for the other to meet him half way. "and not now."

this time,  he shuffled forwards slightly.    careful steps bring them closer to one another,  in where lapis irises drink in his beauty.    scan across his gently dusted cheeks,  and flutter towards the lips he’d longed to lose himself in for the longest while.    a palm freed itself from his mental restraint,   pressing gently against luca’s side.    trailing upwards along the fabric he wore, until his palm caught the arch of his torso in it.    bringing them flush.    in all the years they’d grown together,  they’d never been this close.    in which apollo could lose himself entirely in the warmth radiating from luca’s body,   bathe in it,  allow it to soothe his aches and worries. ＂  i don’t want you to be my shadow anymore,  not anymore. ＂    his neck craned forwards,  a simultaneous tilt of his head accompanied it. ＂  be—  i don’t know,  my sun.    you’re my sun,  luca. ＂    apollo connected their lips flush against each other,   nipping at the swell of his lower lip.    a kiss with added fervor,  as if it were something he’d waited a lifetime to enjoy.    to savor the taste of his honeyed lips,  memorize them incase they’d never share it again.    

The Summer I Turned Pretty || 2.08

luca remembers everything. apollo's first words to him, how easy he fit into the folds of he and his mother's lives, how talking to apollo always felt safe, how the secrets they shared were his treasures, how jealous he'd been when apollo's attention left him for someone else. all this time luca assumed it was because he could never be seen that way, least of all by apollo. only to learn that wasn't the case. and it never was. a heavy sigh emits as he comes to sit beside the other, noting the tremor in his hand. luca was not the only one who feared rejection. "why didn't you tell me?" he asks, their bodies in a familiar stance: side by side. he doesn't look at apollo when he takes his hand, when he massages the calloused skin of his palm; counting each groove of it like they used to count stars. his voice grows quiet, full of remorse and a sadness that seeps from his touch.

❝  you  come  to  check  on  me  or  something,     @alphastationed?  ❞     raven  was  struggling  a  little,     with  the  major  change  of  being  on  the  ground  -  even  if  it  had  been  her  own  choice.     the  ark  had  been  structured,     with  rules  drawn  out.     there'd  been  no  black  or  white  really  up  there.     but  the  ground?     it  seemed  to  be  a  large  grey  area.     one  filled  with  questions  and  so  much  uncertainty.     no  adults  setting  the  rules  or  making  the  decisions.     it  was  just  them  -  a  group  of  kids.     ❝ or  did  you  just  need  an  excuse  to  get  away  from  everyone?  ❞     raven  smiled  softly.

are you always like this?